Girls, We Really Have To Move On

I, with my pacar baru

Wan Leha

I have checked, there is no such thing as crash course in swimming...if there's any, that sort of lessoon will only qualify you to swimming duck in the childrens pool and you are required by law to have a safety jacket or that thing you lekat at your arms.Kalau dah swimming itik tak lepas, apa guna tanya if I can qualify nak jadi rescuer?

Neither do any University here (Nottingham jangan cakaplah) that will offer Chemical Engineering degree course that finish before 17th May.

And finally, I have no power to change my parents.They will still be who they are and they can't change into becoming Davidson's overnight, let alone declaring themselves a royalty.Tak pasal-pasal, kena buang negeri.Kalau kena buang negara to country like USA or UK, okaylah jugak.Tak payah jadik asylum seeker.Automatic dapat their nationality.

As far as I can see, there's nothing much we can do to stop them love birds marrying each other.You girls (that are non-swimmer) can learn how to swim as good as Zara Davidson sampai lemas pun, Raja Nazrin will still go ahead with his plan.

Here comes the motivation speech.If we can get over Jordan Knight,Anuar Zain when he was singing kain pelikat lalalala...or Tom Cruise (before he turned out to be faintly weird), maka, if we try harder, we can get over him.If Wan Zaleha can, we also can.

We must never try on our luck with him just because we have the complete range of collection of that barangan sakti Ann Summer...it will never work.Maybe he is not into that.So Kiah & Bellabedot, utilise your sakti stuff to your beloved husband and it is so true that aku takde collection menda-menda tu kat rumah.I am a dead catalogue shopper, orang suruh beli, aku beli.So, Kiah, sudah-sudahlah nak invite aku dalam game bondage kau tu...

On a personal level, I have finally got over my cinta agung with that horrible monyet. Yes tuan/puan, at 34, 18 years after meeting and loving that creature I called man, and after hatiku dah dipenyek-penyek kannya, maka I am am now able to walk free without any ounce of love for him left (cakap besar nya...tunggu lah bila Mamat ni bantai hantar email ke ajak kembali kepangkuan) I now have to do the same with Raja Nazrin.It is hard.My ex masa dok active menipu aku dulu, at least he is getting married, he extend me an invitation.Raja Nazrin, jangan kata nak invite I, berterus terang pun tidak.Ka lau yak dek kerna Kiah kaki gossip yang bagitau, sampai matilah I tak tau yang my ex boyfriend yang ini dah nak kahwin.

So, Raja Nazrin and Zara, get married in peace yeah? Although, I am anxious to ask, rumours has it that the reason why you tak jadi kahwin with Wan Leha dulu is because your mom tak suka (yelah, Wan Leha tu kan commonners, but so is your mom kan?) But now, suddenly you can get the go ahead pulak? Well, although she is partly royalty, nama takdelah Tengku-Tengku kan? Maybe your mom dah nampak cahaya kebenaran...nak memilih sangat, tak bercuculah pulak nanti...tak gitu Bang Nazrin? (This will make me kena buang negara...dah lah that day Sultan Perak marah kat Utusan Malaysia)

Sesiapa yang ada DVD recordable player, sila record his wedding ceremony and hantar kat I, so that I, for the last time, can have a good cry, sambil minum kopi 434 I, yang dekat nak habis tu.