Boring Stuff

***Entry Ini, Dah busuk***

Owh...saya sungguh meluat betul dengan kes-kes meliwat ini.

Macamlah dah tak ada masalah lain melainkan masalah orang-orang ini aje yang jadi perkara paling penting sampai

a) Budak hilang tak jumpa-jumpa
b) Minyak kereta yang mahal nak mampus tapi takde orang nak buat apa-apa
c) Orang yang kuat tidur tu masih lagi jadik PM

So Anwar sodomised one young bum, what are we going to do? How is he pleasuring himself is going to help our nation? Anwar sampai mati pun boleh mampu isi minyak kereta...he can afford big houses, he travel as and when. He can talk shit from his arse until the cow come home and he is still very well look after.

Yang kita ni? Perlukah nak dilayan lagi orang-orang yang konon nya niat hanya satu, nak menolong rakyat?

Susahkan....bila semua orang nak jadik Boss ni.

Update...Jgn Tak Update

***Entry Ini Pun Dah Basi Juga***

Dua 3 hari ni, hati I memanglah sakit...ni kira kes harapkan pagar, pagar sungguh jahat. Habis komputer riba ku di jahanamkan nya.

Disebakan cuaca kat England sekarang ni macam puaka...although, I misti bersyukur pasalnya, bila I balik Malaysia...owwhh..maafkan statement bongkak ku ini...I sungguhlah tak tahan panas. Betul you..kadang-kadang I malu sungguh nak ngaku hakikat yang I ni dah jadik sombong bongkak and Melayu tak sedar dek untung. Bila I balik KL...siang hari kerja ku tidur dan menjadi Ibu Tiri yang amat garang to my niece and nephew yang sungguhlah berperangai puaka ittew...

Bila malam...bontot ni macam panas nak keluar meronggeng malam-malam buta dan of course lah, activity malaman ku itu tidak direstui oleh Ayahnda dan Bonda. Tapi apakan daya...anaknda ini sudah 35 umurnya dan tak reti bahasa. Nak pulak, niat anaknda berjalan malam disokong seratus peratus oleh adinda-adinda setan yang lain...so, Ayahnda dah tak boleh nak cakap apa, melainkan mendoakan kesejahteraan anak-anaknya yang berperangai syaitan ini. Ceh!!!!

Okay...my laptop was badly affected by Trojan virus. Mak Badak lah yang punya angkara. Tah hapa file benbarang free yang dia accept, habis laptop jadi slow and tak bermaya.

And because I ni kedekut nak mampos, kerja-kerja repair terpaksa diserahkan kepada orang IT kat Head Office yang of course lah, personal laptop ni kurang priority nya.So, entah bila laptop ku akan sembuh, tuhan ajelah yang tahu. I am hardly in the office nowadays and by the time I sampai rumah, I macam dah penat nak mampus.

So, I will endeavour to update as frequent as I can but since orang lain pun macam malas nak update blog sendiri tapi mengharapkan aku aje yang update, maka dengan ini dimaklum kan kat you all...kalau ada update, adalah ye. Kalau takde...tak ada lah.

Selamat membaca you all.

Selamat Balik Kampung...

**** Entry ini..sungguhlah dah basi nya***

Ehemm...dalam pada I nak berlagak riak nak balik Mesia..ghope-ghope nya ada orang yang akan terbang dulu...5 minggu pulak tu.Isk..I dah tak taw apa nak cakap, melainkan ucapan aku benci padamu...hiahhh!!!!

So kepada Puan Zaiton...selamat pulang ke tanah tumpah darah mu...(eh..you ada ke darah yang nak tumpah?)

Tag

Hjh Leemah dah dari bulan lepas dengan kejam nya listed me in one of his tag...kalaulah sebab tak sayang, memang akan ku persetan kan saja tag mu ittew...tapi, kalau kawan-kawan yang tag, misti dibuat dengan patuh nya...nak nak pulak Puan Zaiton pun dah jawab tag nya..and I pung takdok alasang nak mengelak...so, nah kau Hjh Leemah yang dikala tag ni buat tengah berantakan kat Milang nung....

Okehhh....soklang pertama, apakah nama airline yang bakal dinaiki oleh Hjh Esah and Co, bila balik Malaya nanti ? (Ehh...ada ke orang tanya soklang tu?)

Name 4 Things That Need To Be Invented

Susah betul nak jawab soklang ni...ye lah, menda-menda yang I suka semuanya dah di invent oleh manusia.However, I quite like if human can design and invent more useful things like,

a) Bullet train from London to Kuala Lumpur...not many people yang suka naik flight.Pahtu kalau kaki lenguh, boleh jenjalang dalam train tu.Tak payah nak mengharap kat flight attendant yang kadang2 ber mood puaka (ni kes, habis clubbing, tak cukup tidur terus fly kan?) Yang ada pung sekarang...naik lah train sampai Russia nun..pahtu naik that Trans Siberian train sampai China...2 minggu nak sampai Thailand...berak dalam seluar lah kalau camtu...

b) Satellite Navigator (for car) sekali dengan tips-tips for jalan short cut...

c) A portable/wearable navigator untuk orang-orang yang selalu jalan kaki cam I ni...misti ada indicator bila locating anjing garang a mile ahead, or sesapa mugger/pencopet/perogol bersiri/paranoid schizophrenia yang tengah meroyan and anything that can pose a danger to me.Better still, kalau gadget ni juga boleh berfungsi sebagai pistol, so takyah lah nak tunggu polis datang baru nak solve problem.

d) Software from the tape recorder yang boleh transform minute-minute meetings into reports, so tak payah lah aku ni kena menaip/menulis bagai...penat taww...(tapikan..habislah Boss I yang suka mencarut dalam meeting tu....semua eff eff keluar)

Name 4 Things That Should Never Have Been Invented

a) Abdullah Ahmad Badawi
b) Khairy Jamaluddin
c) Akademi Fantasia (no offence lah ye...but surely, how could you have voted for that budak botak to win?)
d) Anwar Ibrahim....not because I think he is stupid or anything alike, but do you really want a Prime Minister yang dari dulu sampai sekarang dok bersakit hati aje?

Name 3 Things That I Don't Know About You

a) I am legally married, but I still live like a single woman...kejam tak I?

b) I am not medically/psychologically trained, but I am part of the Team that care for adult with complex mental incapacity and dysfunction (tu dia berlagakkkkk)

c) I wear my wrist watch on my right hand with the face facing inward. Orang tanya apsal...I jawab, pasal I tak nak calarkan the surface...

Name 5 Snacks You Enjoy.....

a) Karipap
b) Biskut Bantal

c) Asam Kulit Limau
d) Twisties
e) Kuih Coklat Bertatah Kelapa...(hapa ke nama nya Kiah!!!!)


Sekian.....I tak nak tag sesapa....sebab orang yang I nak tag


a) Tengah berpantang
b) Akan berpantang...tapi sekarang ni dia dah delete blog dia, jahat tawww....
c) Tengah cari tempat nak express susu anak kat opis dia...so, I tak nak lah menambah stress dia nah?
d) Tengah menjerang air, nak minum air putih punya pasal...so saves her from having to pronounce nama-nama minerla water yang susahsangatanaksebut tu.

Updates

I need to say this....

a) To those who was born in 1972...let's get this fact very,very straight yeah...beranak lah kau bulan berapa pun...when we are in 2008, you are now officially 36 tawww!!! Masuk je tahun baru...umur pun bertukar la...ni tak, dah 2,3 entry, tetap jugak aku nampak umur dia tu masih 35. Jeles kat aku yang 35 ni ke?

b) Ni lagi sorang....lagi sekali dia kompang dia balik KUL macam travel dari USJ ke Sunway Pyramid naik Rapid KL, even dalam comment box aku pung, siap mung!!! Sungguh sensitip taw...mung tak pe lah..mung tok payoh baya tambang pung...kami-kami ni? Dah dapat naik Sri Lankan Airlines yang £517.00 (haruslah nak bagitau orang berapa I paid for the flight kan?) sungguh lah bersujud sahwi nya....(tapi kan..disebab kan mung berkompang sokmo..mung jgn lupa tapau VCD haram, tuna chilli dalam tin and sampoerna ijau)...macam siyall kan? Marah..tapi dalam kemarahan sempat jugak nak mengambik kesempatang...

c) Tahniah kepada Mak Datin yang baru beli DSLR camera tu...(nak ambik gambar siapa tataw....gambar janz-janz yang membeli belah kat Netto ke?) Bangang betul amazon bagi free gift yang tak perlu tu kan? Apa kata free gift tu di free gift kan kepada I yang memerlukan ni? (hehehe...kesempatang lagi)

d) Selamat berjalang jugak kepada Ratu ELeeZabeth yang akan menerokai ruang udara Milang itu...nervous ye? Gigih sungguh nak berjalang noh...dihangkutnya jugak Putera Phillip walaupun Putera Phillip baru jatuh tersembam...bila nya mung nak samang Cambridge City Council tu???

e) Good luck on planning another escapade to Sue Typhoon...(ingat lain kali bawak peta taww..tak pun, invest in Satelitte Navigator)

f) To Elviza....Selamat berpindah rumah besar bagi kemudahan anak untuk melompat (dan jugak mak bapak untuk bercakaran) Eh..since anak kau suka melompat, apa kata kau beli trampolining...mana taw, dah besar dia boleh jadi Gymnast ke hapa...

g) Kepada kengkawan ku yang tak boleh nak pronounce nama brand-brand mineral water....(adakah ni untuk penayangan kepada Diva yang terasa dia bagus tu?) well, Volvic is one of them...(tapi Volvic is so cheapo brand lah here...) kalau nak lagi glam..Pfitzier, Perrier,Evian...tak pung, cakap ajelah air putih....semua waiter tau.Dah lah uols...give it a rest..anak dia comot!!!! Larikkkkkkkk...

Have a nice day.

It's Not You....It Is Me....(Fade To Black)

I agree to see this ex client/patient of mine...(yang sebenarnya terpaksa, because we bumped into each other when he was at the centre having his Depo injection) I saw him last year and I ended our work together as I feel at that time, Pakcik ni dah recover from his issues. ----Pakcik was having a nervous breakdown you...bila his wife left him------

But jantan is still a jantan...bila nak ditinggalkan, masa tu lah ada nervous breakdown...tapi bila dia dah dapat release kan his wife from his system, tak tunggu siang terus dapat pengganti.I looked at his file and that kira-kira nya, dia dah in a new relationship for a 8 months githoo...I can still see his red eye, ayaq mata and ayaq hidung yang berchuchuran...dek tak sanggup ditinggalkan.But in the end, kena jugak tinggal...yelah, siapalah yang tahan berlakikan jantan Manic Depressive kan? Hari ni okay, besok serabut, lusa sayang menyayang, tulat macam nak dibunuhnya kau bila kau lambat hidang kopi...

He told me that he met his current gf during our work together.He said that knowing her made the moving on process lot easier (eleh...memanglah, kalau dah ada yang baru, haruskah kau terus nak mengenang orang lama? Lain lah I ni...)

Since Pakcik ni only nak chat-chat dengan I...I pun okaylah...tapi sebenarnya, tak boleh tau...but, tak kan aku nak cakap NO kang buatnya dia datang gila, tak ke susah? I asked Pakcik the first time I jumpa dia, 2 days ago, if he want to be referred to other support worker? Pakcik cakap, alah...nak chat-chat saja, tak yah ikut protocol, lagi pun katanya dia tak sakit (see..first sign tau, org macam ni selalu cakap diorang tu okay...tapi, satu dunia tahu dia tu tak okay)

Psychiatrist cakap dengan I, kalau Makji nak ada casual chat dengan dia..takpelah, tapi jangan commit because Makji kan ke dah kerja lain department? (Hah..meh nak kompang..Makji dah masuk Dept. Substance Misuse tawww? Tunggulah sikit hari lagi, pasti akan slim lah diri ku hisap dadah)

Pakcik ni cerita kat I yang gf baru dia ni macam dah distant githoo...and last week, they have a heart to heart talk together and she wants sometime alone...maka Pakcik sudah gundah gulana...takut pisang berbuah for the 2nd time and gf baru akan break off. His gf cakap dengan dia yang she think that it is not working...it is me. It is not your fault. Berderai dunia Pakcik ni. So Pakcik ni tanyalah I..what do you think, Makji? Is she cheating on me ? Cehh..typical jantan kan...kalau pompuan need time off, mulalah pikir yang ada jantan dah menunggu...

I must share with you...kita ni kalau nak nasihat pun kena hati-hati...not many people will hear things they way it is, nak nak kalau dah deluded sangat dengan segala prasangka.While we had hope dengan maju moden nya Malaysia bersama Pak Lah..(eh..tetiba aje) we just can't expect people to feel like we do...

Ada opis mate dedolu, datang kerja dok cerita keburukan laki dia aje...tak leh tahan lah, tu lah, nilah..sampai kita yang terpaksa mendengarnya pun rasa naik menyampah.What I did was...offer her the bestest solution I can think of for her at that time...kalau dah rasa tak tahan dan menyampah, bercerai aje lah kan? There's a limit with patience...we can try but some people will work things out and some just don't know how to change....and how I wish, I tak bukak mulut sebabnya, after that her laki bila datang jemput her from work will give a the dirtiest look you can ever ask for.Lepas tu, one of the Sr Manager cakap kat I..eh Makji, betul ke you suruh si dia tu mintak cerai? Dah..aku pulak yang kena dah...but wouldn't you, kalau orang tu dah hari-hari cerita hal laki dia...kalau cerita part laki malas mandi ke, pengotor ke tak apalah..ni pi cerita kat seantero opis betapa laki nya ku ada problem dalam adegan konket mengongket ni....hish...well, maybe I shouldn't say anything.

We always think that the other person easy way out of a relationship is by saying 'It's not you, it is me'.I used to think that. Although in a way, it is an easy way out...when you think about it, we just don't say thing we don't mean.Yes, it is me who maybe feel a bit different now...but why do I feel this way? Because of you lah kan?

It takes 2 to tango.People fell out of love sometimes because of obvious reason. You lost interest...dah lama sangat and dah rasa boring.Unless you are diagnosed with Complex Aspergers and tanpa ada perasaan, you can just tell your the other person..eh, aku dah bosan lah dengan kau.Because that is how you feel.

It is you who contributes to the way the other person think about you.It is only normal people can just get fed up.

While we can just cry ourselves a river after the other person dah mula menampak kan sifat-sifat kurang prihatin nya, maybe we like to ask ourselves if he/she is worth wasting your tears for? We may think that we are the best, we are worth fighting for, but are we really?

I'm not the best example alive.My ex dumped me twice and I think, it was my love that keep him alive in my heart...although he professed his love, I am not the one he chose to marry...isk..isk..isk...

So tak banyak sikit, akulah yang jadi penyebab kenapa chenta tak sampai ke penghujung...

I told this Pakcik, I honestly don't think it is advice that he is after...men hardly asked for advice because they always think straight...a man will make a straight decision although it is not always a good one, lainlah kita pompuan-pompuan ni...berpikir panjannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng sangat...pikir apa akan jadi kat orang tu lah, pikir apa akan jadi kat orang ni lah..tapi pasal diri sendiri tak pikir...

Pakcik went into another relationship right away after his wife left him. The obvious reason is that he can't cope with being empty.The ego side of him is that he needs to know what is wrong with him...but maybe it is just nothing.I just said to him...it is good now that you have time to think whether this is what you want or not.

Having someone by our side is almost habitual.Human function better when they are more than 1. But sometimes, things are not meant to be. You can still function as 1, maybe not as good as 2 but bearable.

I just hope Pakcik will not start stalking his estranged gf....he was doing that with the wife before...aduhh!!!!

Marilah Kita Makan Keledek....

Menurut sumber yang boleh dipercayai, Pak Tidollah telah menyarankan rakyat Malaysia supaya makan keledek just because recently ni, ada rice crisis. Makan keledek ye?

The Leaders...as they like to call themselves kadang-kadang bercakap tak serupa bikin and what is obvious is the contradiction.

Before, we have this kempen Melawat Malaysia...berchotti lah dalam Malaysia while all the cabinet leaders akan membawak segorombolan adik kakak pergi melawat oversea.To make matters worst, all their overseas holiday snaps will be published in Jelita/Wanita and tah hapa-hapa lagi magazine yang majority nya dibeli oleh mak-mak kita yang takdelah nak mampu bawak anak-anak gi makan angin kat Disneyland...(even Disneyland yang kata nak buat kat PD tu tah hapa jadi tatau)

After that, mulalah masing-masing buat kempen makanlah buah-buahan tempatan...I'm sure mak Datin would rather die with Gala Apple in their hand than buah deghoyan kan?

So, Pak Lah nak kita makan keledek? Kita kan ada ladang padi kat Kedah nun...or is that just to cater Pak Lah and Co?

What are they going to do now with the new high rise petrol price? Galakkan rakyat naik public transport yang penuh dengan sexual predator tu ke? And The Leader is ferry around in their Merce...or paling koman Protong Perdana...

Tony Blair pun naik train lah Pak Lah...that Conservative Leader pun naik beskal...

Kesian nya orang kat Malaysia....

Big Bother....

MB cakap dengan we all (I dengan MB2) yang dia tu kunun nya tahun depan nak masuk Big Brother.Eh..tetiba aje kan?

I have not been active with watching BB this year...well, salah satu dari sebabnya ialah kerana perperangan dingin dengan Orang Tua tu. See, we both BB mad.Because of what I do for a living, watching BB is like shadowing all the patient in their secure unit.Si Tua tu pulak...erm, let me think...Si Tua is a writer and that watching this sort of program kiranya bagi idea lah kat dia...plus, I actually never really asked apsal dia suka nengok Big Brother.

When I finally sat down in front of the telly, watching the eviction last Friday, tengok muka sekor-sekor...tuhan aje lah yang tahu if I can like them all in person, let alone living with them. Lainlah Puan Zaiton dgn Makcik Hjh Leemah yang memasing bercita-cita tinggi nak mengorat si Dale tu...eh, apasal you all tak taste dengan Mohamad yang rambut macam sarang tabuan ittew?

So, kami cakaplah dengan MB, yang kau nak masuk sangat Big Brother tu kenapa...kau tau tak kau terberak pun masuk dalam TV.Knowing MB yang sungguh kureng sense of vanity, maka kalau dia masuk Big brother next year, habislah arang akan terconteng kat muka keluarga nya...

When I was doing my CBT course, we used BB as a study tool (yang benarnya, student2 lain used it as a study tool tapi aku ni, tah kemana lah study nya...) We discussed every contestant...(teruk kan? Kerja cakap pasal orang aje kami ni)

For whatever reason masing2 nak masuk BB...hanya mereka yang tahu.What I can't stand (because it is simply pure shit) is when people say things like..I'm going into BB house because I want to learn more about myself....erm, like what eh?

People just don't learn about themselves in 13 weeks....counselling session pun 15 weeks, tu pun kena yang kepala lembu, 15 weeks belum tentu lagi menjanjikan kebahagiaan mutlak.Have you heard about people yang gi kompang serata alam yang katanya..I've been to counselling...and dengan tetiba aje terasa segala wayar dalam kepala yang bersimpul macam rambut mak gagak dah jadi lurus dan senang di urus.....

The beauty of counselling is...(unlike counselling Jabatan Agama demi menyelamatkan rumahtangga) you can talk about anything without being judge.That is how it is suppose to be...you are given a space and it is all about you.

You are likely to learn about yourself more in a quiet place like that (the counselling room) and bukannya dalam BB house.Nak nak pulak kalau housemate you yang berjenis mulut super puaka macam Alex tu...

I think, what it is about BB house is more to a desperation for exposure.It is easy to watch than being watch.You are constantly conscious that every step you make is an open view and it is very hard to keep up.We always think that we know what we want...but quite often, when we got what we want, we can't cope with it.

So, berbalik kat MB...I cakap dengan dia...takyah lah nak masuk BB.Knowing her...after 2 hari dia akan start meghoyan..pasal malaun-malaun tu pengotor and MB, janganlah kau berani nak kumpul pinggan dalam sink....

Not to mention some religious police who will pick on every little thing like...gelak kuat2 tak mencerminkan nilai keislaman or berjoget lambak sangatlah meruntuhkan moral pompuan melayu...

Tapi kalau Puan Zaiton & Hjh Leemah berkeras hentak kaki nak masuk Big Brother tahun depan...I janji, I akan undi sampai bill Vodaphone I naik sejuta, boleh?

Arkib Seminggu

Let's see....kalau ikutkan hati, rasa nak tidur.Takde masa nak update blog.Kerja banyak...Big Brother pun tak ber tengok-tengok. Unlike orang yang tengah ber maternity leave bagai tu. But, I did have an interesting week, takdelah se interesting orang lain but good enough to become my latest blog entry.Takdelah nak cerita pasal psychopath aje...

1. Musim Panas Di England
Elviza bertanya, syok ke musim panas? Ohh..panas ke? As far as I can remember, panasnya adalah 2,3 hari but being a Melayu tak sedar diri that I am, I can no longer appreciate the sun, maklumlah kan ke aku ni datang dari negara kutu-listiwa tu? While orang putih macam tak sedar diri nak menepek-nepek sun cream sun block diorang and berjemuran diatas padang...(and you Malaysian man are thinking...alangkah indahnya dapat menyaksikan segala neka size chest fruit) I pulak, rasa nak berpayung aje kulu kilir...puas taww nak putih kan kulit!!! But after 2,3 days of berpanasan, tetiba hujan and kesejukan...Summer hapa kebenda nya ni?

2. The Apprentice...Final
Many people macam tak syok aje bila si Sir Alan Sugar tu decided to hire Lee McQueen...(Hjh Leemah..you taste ke dengan Pakcik banyak parut jerawat ni?) Well, I can understand kenapa orang tak puas hati...pasalnya the runner up tu, si Claire debab tu is far more capable.If I am allowed an opinion, si tukang-tukang komplen tu kena ingat...The Apprentice is not like Britain Got Talent ke, Big Brother ke where you have to call and text to vote. So..viewers don't decide. Si Alan Sugar tu yang decide, pasalnya itu kompeni dia.As I am train to watch people people menggunakan teknik-teknik emosi...I think Sir Alan Sugar selected Lee McQueen for a very obvious reason...that is he is the one who deliver. Si Claire debab is capable, very capable but halfway through...she missed the vital point in the process. She is more interested in focussing her emotional relationship with Sir Alan and not being herself. The last 2 episodes shows clearly that she prefer to be in Sir Alan good book and not using her expertise to win the task. Kesimpulannya, kalau you sibuk nak menjaga hati and tak buat kerja yang sepatutnya kena buat pun tak bermakna jugak kan? Kena buang jugak...

c) Story of a man and his crime
I was travelling on the Picadilly Line to from Finsbury Park to Hammersmith. A good 40 minutes. If I am not mistaken, si Pakcik ni appears from Green Park.The seat next to mine is vacant and dia pun melabuhkan kan lah pungkok nya. What is it with men and the need to mengangkang luas-luas when seated? Pakcik is violating my private space and because of his kangkangan yang mencapai almost 45 darjah, I had to reposition my knee. Not only his knee trespassing my seating area, he used up the arm rest with his bagak arm and I had no choice but to shrink.Sial betul. The next crime of his ialah...oit..tak reti ke nak pakai deodorant? As Capt Lukmag rightly pointed out, this type of men smells like minyak bijan...I am trying very hard not to give out his ethnicity away, kang dikata racist lak...but I kid you not, the bijan smell (ni busuk punya bijan ni) is so distinctive and annoying that I had to swerve my nostril towards this young lady seated next to me, unbeknown to her that I actually sought comfort in her smell...I had no choice you, Pakcik Bijan BO really is a leathal! Pakcik Bijan crime didn't stop there. He was wearing...red collared long sleeves shirt and strippy light brown trousers with a very loud drawings on both back pockets...a trouser that only suits gay man. Mesti dia rasa lawa sungguh...but I know for sure, most reasonably dressed man would not wish to be found dead in that trouser....sungguh lah tak kena nya...

d) Perlukah aku berkawan dengan miewww?
JT sent a friend request to me on Facebook . I'm sure semua orang dah tahu apa masalahku dengan si Badak Berendam ittew...Let's cut the long story short. I am quite picky with mates...therefore, aku ni takdelah banyak kawan.Dah le aku ni perilaku buruk. I sometimes question people's motivation to get acquainted with one another...do we just want to know people for the sake of 'yehh..aku kenal dia....hahahaha' like that. JT, to begin with, bukanlah lah kawan dengan I pun...bahkan, I doubt he know that I exist masa dia puas ber chentaan kulu kilir dengan gofren nya kat MRSM dedolu.I made my feelings very clear to him...pandai pulak lepas kena maki hamun tu me low profile kan diri, kan? Tup-tup..munchullll piula kat facebook and I bet, if I add him, mula lah adegan cocok mencocok akan berlaku. If only you can stab rather than poke...

e) Sri Lankan Airlines
Nak balik Malaysia dimusim panas and dekat nak raya...sungguhlah sengsara nya. In the end, setelah puas ku google segala mala website tambang murah, Sri Lankan Airlines proved to be the cheapest...hajat hati nak berlagak naik Emirates bagai...this flight will take us to Colombo before adjourning to KUL. I can imagine my snooty sedara mara yang selalunya berterbangan naik 1st class itu menyindir...'apo? kau naik patobang koling tu?' (ahhhhh) 'namo yo dok London...' (aik..apa kena mengena duduk London dgn SL Airlines?) See, people always associate duduk London dengan pitih belana. Cilako!!!!!

Entry Kepala Serabut......Nombor 2

Kawan-kawan yang dicingtahi....mekasih kerana sudi membagi comment yang sungguh therapeutic untuk diriku yang dah stoing-stoing ikan ini....

Speaking of ikan...Puan Zaiton, ikan emas wanita asia itu ditemui mati dalam keadaan tergolek gelantang dalam balangnya pagi ini.Sebab-sebab kematian, takleh nak dipastikan tapi 2,3 menjak ni, perut ikan emas yang sekor tu telah mengembung tanpa sebab. Menurut Cik Putih Lou, dia menyedari kematian ikan emas itu ketika dia sedang mengisap rokok dipagi hari.Tambahnya lagi...antara yang memilukan dirinya (pilu konon...tah tah ikan tu mati kanser peparu kan?) ialah ikan yang sekor lagi tu dilihat sedang berhempas pulas cuba menyelamatkan mangsa. Ikan emas itu juga telah selamat dikebumikan dibelakang rumah dengan bacaan Bismillah...oleh Cik Putih Lou, katanya.....

Patah tumbuh hilang berganti kan? Like any other majority jantan yang baru mati bini...MB telah bercadang untuk mencari pengganti ikan emas tu hari Khamis ni.

I have had an eventful day today...although I was blamed for causing acute constipation (padahal dia yang makan telur dadar hari-hari) tapi takpe...tuduhlah aku.

One of my patient was having a relapse....mulanya bercakap sensorang...pastu ketawa mengilai-ngilai cam Suster Ngesot and pastu boleh nangis cam nak rak macam John Terry missed penalty...and pastu terus naik hantu, stormed out from the unit and bergasaklah kitorang mengejar dia...

Nak dijadikan cerita, tah macam mana, she escape from the unit.Tau tau pukul 1.30 am last Saturday, police telephone we all nak bagitau yang si patient ni ada kat balai, buat report yang dia ni dah kena rog. Alamakkkk....but listen to this, katanya, dia kena rog when she was 8. Tak ke 32 years too late ni? Because she was too disorientated and in schidzoid state, police tak leh lah nak buat apa-apa melainkan suruh makcik ni balik rumah saja...

So, makcik returned back to the unit.Still hallucinating and I thought, she is way to vulnerable to be allowed back into the community.We can't hold her back...against her human rights pulak..but if I don't do something...makcik akan berjalan serata alam and akan adalah nanti allegations-allegations yang org ni rog dia lah...org ni pukul dia lah.Habis satu Kensington kena tuduh merogol nanti....

I pun suruh lah si Demoted Manager ni (ala...pompuan Nigeria yang hobi nya mengugut I tu) contact Duty Psychiatrist...pasalnya, to get someone into secure care, you must be medic professional yang boleh buat scientific analysis...tak cukup dengan 'Oh I think she is not well' aje...so, basically, I am not certified to have her locked up, I do not have a medical background to diagnosed that she is unfit. So, I pun bagilah instruction kat si DM ni...dengan harapan, kalaulah makcik ni masuk sepital, maka secara tak langsung, selamatlah manusia-manusia lain and not to mention, to protect this lady herself.

No surprise...si DM not only tak buat apa yang ku suruh...malah disuruhnya Psychiatrist tu telephone I...and what am I suppose to do? I wasn't there...kiranya macam ni lah...you ada maid jaga anak you..anak you jatuh patah tangan...and you are far from home.Obviously you tell your maid who to call as she is physically there to see the severity of the incident.Ni tak...si maid tu bantai suruh nurse or doctor to call you.What can you say...Nurse, anak saya patah tangan...tolong lah ubat kan...but do you know is the tangan really patah or just tergeliat? DM tak cukup dengan tu, dia boleh suruh pulak Psychiatrist ni telephone police.Apa ke hal nya?

So, makcik yang berhalusinasi gila babi ni, bukan aje not getting right treatment, malah dibiarkan aje keluar rumah...

Cut the story short, cari punya cari, kami pun (I dengan jantan-jantan hensem yang kerja dgn I) jumpa makcik ni...in such a bad state...kotor,serabut,hancing...and menyanyi-nyanyi riang.Maka kami terpaksa pujuk dia pi spital and of course, to dealing with someone who has no concept of what is right and wrong is a real struggle...makcik telah menyerang beberapa pedestrian kiri-kanan...nasib baik sorang pun tak buat police report...all the way I had to apologise to the beaten up public....

After 6 hours waiting...maka makcik telah di sectioned.....and besok, siaplah aku kena interrogate dengan segala mala Officer dalam Social Services tu....aiyoooo....

Do you want my job?

Entry Kepala Serabut.....Lagi

Pernah tak merasa bila bangun pagi, or bila-bila masa tidur pastu terjaga and start thinking....

What am I doing here? Why do I bother?

Macam tu lah rasanya hari ni. For over a week, I was forced into attending 'Positive Practise In Behavioural Support' training kat Bristol sinun. I don't carry my laptop, kununnya, tak memerlukannya sangat.Ye lah tu...plus, ada 2,3 manager lain yang pergi, so Makcik2 ni misti pakat bawak laptop memasing, so kiranya, bolehlah I ni menumpang guna gittew...

But in the end, I was the only person that the company sent. To make matters worst, bawak mobile phone..pastu charger nya tertinggal. Merasa mencatu-catu bar battery telepon.Sengsara sungguh hidupku.

Before I went, I bergaduh dengan orang tua tu. Tak ingatlah pasal apa....always like that, bila bergaduh, we fought hard like adalah gross misconduct ala-ala I was caught having an affair ke tapi after a while, tak ingatlah piula pasal apa punca gaduhnya, tapi yang nyata, HATIKU INI MASIH SAKIT YOU ALL!!!!!!!

I am not happy at work. I am now decided not to take up the promotion, walaupun dapat naik over £3k gaji (bongkak kan..siap cakap dalam blog lagi pasal gaji)...I emailed Boss my decision and the reasons behind. In fact, I am thinking to leave the service all together and to find work in more non-profit environment.

I realised today that I desperately miss my family.I haven't call my parents for months...I sent them postcard but I'm too, not sure if malas or malu to call.

Leaving me alone on my own if my father's greatest fear. I have let him living in fear for the last 9 years. Sihat ke, selamat ke...

When you feel like shit, all you can think of is that, it is the consequences of all your bad doings,to your parents.

I bought my flight ticket home yesterday...and yes, I will telephone home soon. My mother is a calming influence. And I desperately need to feel calm.

Take care all.

Entry Sesak Kepala

It took such a long time to have this published...kan? Apahal nya? Busy...that's why...

Peperangan mulut dan emosi antara puak-puak berhaluan kiri Jamaica & Nigeria yang berkerja dibawah arahan supervisor nya yang didatangkan khas dari Paroi Jaya, Seremban semakin berlanjutan and menyesakkan kepala. Hish...kalau kepala diorang yang sesak takpelah jugak...ni kepala aku yang jadi mangsa...speaking of which...their kepala is literally sesak tau..with their rambut. Sometime you don't know what sort of pesen rambut they arrived with when they come to work...ada yang macam tocang lipan...and pulak yang macam kena karan...but let me tell you, gagak don't wash their hair for weeks...mana yang good hygiene tu,takdelah berbau...mana yang dah le BO nya dah tak boleh nak tolong, kalau yang lain dah tak berbasuh berkurun lamanya...harus kau boleh mati keracunan toxic tawww....

Their attitude at work aggravates the hell out of me. Hari-hari I datang kerja, I kena ugut. Kalau kena ugut dengan patient tak pelah kan...because selalunya dengan patient ni, kita dah mentally and emotionally prepared...tapi kalau dengan kaum yang tak di officially diagnosed ni, payah jugak.Bagi arahan sikit, ada ke dikatanya aku cuba nak threaten dia? When you try to rationalised...dijawabnya dengan kata-kata 'hey, I'm not deaf'.

I started to employ my own team in that unit. One Australian guy and another cockney guy. Very efficient...and Boss is very happy. We got this massive complaints from other unit of Social Services (the unit that pays) and now, dengan pertolongan jantan-jantan yang efficient (dan hensem) ni, maka terlihatlah sinar-sinar positive dalam pesakit-pesakit mental dalam my unit ni.

But, last week, the guys..my new guys dah berura-ura nak berhenti.Katanya, mereka menyampah sungguh dengan puak-puak hitam neraka sisa tu...(amboi..emosi lah ni) The treatment they received from puaka-puaka tu sungguh mematahkan semangat.

Some may ask, Makji, you kan Boss they all...apasal you tak nak sack aje 3 ekor burung gagak tu? Okay...I think, yang sorang tu bakal dipecat middle next month...sebab selama 3 bulan ni, puas I mengumpulkan bukti-bukti kukuh yang dia tu sungguhlah tak berguna nya. Bukan senang nak sack orang...especially kalau orang itu orang hitam. The common (and boring) consequences ialah mereka-mereka ni will then counter attack you dengan racial discrimination. Tak kuasa nyah..nak berlawan-lawan dalam court!!!

To be quite honest, I find this task...eliminating people off their job is very depressing...maklumlah kan..aku ni sensitive.

I am really struggling here...so, ni nak mintak jasa baik orang-orang yang tak berapa hitam yang tengah berpantang tu...kalau blog ni tak active, janganlah nak meroyan macam orang kena Paranoid Schidzophrenia Tahap 3 pulak....kang I suruh DBI prescribe Risperidal Consta injection, kau nak ke? Terus kau diam 2 minggu kan?

To Puan Zaiton, yang kembali semua kealam blogging setelah di Pushing Daisies oleh Abg Leeds (matilah tatau cerita tapi nak nompang sekaki), selamat kembalian...kamek mauk visit kitak dia sia kelak.

To Hjh Leemah...yang tak tau as we speak ni kat Europe ke, kat Scandinavia ke..kat mana-mana crusing or cottaging ke (matilah mulut ku yang jahat inieew) akan ku laksanakan Tag mu ittew...after I balik from training nanti...

To Bini Mokhtar....ghaib terus nah? Apahal?

To Lokmang............mano nya Samperna Ijau?

Cya soon.

Must Have Bad Streak

Tadi I bukak blog kat opis and terkantoi....

Takdelah major sampai nak kena disciplinary ke apa, it is just that my opis mate notice the 'It's Too Late' yang secara automatic will come out when I'm on the page. My opis mate tanya..eh Makji, you suka dengar lagu ni eh? Ada apa-apa ke Makji?

Because my opis mate ni baik ati,I takdelah rasa nak menyumpah dalam hati 'mind your own business' githoo...sebagai meng cover line, I pun cakaplah 'Ohh..I just like Carole King'.I think masing-masing in the mood ber gebang...maka teruslah bercakap pasal music and how it affect our lives...boring tak tempat kerja I? Hajat hati nak jugak bercerita pasal laki orang tu ada affair dengan saikoteri dia or bini orang tu ada affair dengan drebar taxi bla..bla..bla..but really, there is no one of that kind of occurence to be gossiped about about, Hah!!! Lagi boring kan? Like I said, orang putih ni kalau ada masalah-masalah cam tu suka gi kompang dalam daytime television...biar satu negara tahu.I think it is better like that...alang-alang nak bercerita sangat hal kain dalam, buat lah terang-terangan aje...semua orang pun akan tau and there will be no such thing as 'I or you talking behind our back'.

My opis mate ni, on work placement kat opis I...dia ni lagi experience from me you...in terms of qualifications nya...compare to I yang qualifications ala-ala hidup segan mati tak mau ni, bila nak buat decision aje, kena refer buku.Si Makcik ni, segala info ada dalam kepala, fresh from the oven githoo...

Opis mate I tanya...is that song about your current partner, if you don't mind me asking? I pun cakap...I'm not sure, maybe yes and maybe no. Hmmm...interesting.

Tapi bila I thought hard...the song was about arwah my ex...maybe it is 10 years too late, tapi aku bukan ke ada syndrome delayed reaction...kalau orang buat joke semalam, hari ni baru I bantai gelak sensorang...

Opis Mate I terkejut gila bila dapat tahu yang pakcik ni baru mati and that we actually separated over 12 years ago...apa ke bangang benau kau ni Esah...dah 12 tahun? Orang mati laki pun dah kawin baru tau...

I ada dengar-dengar orang kata..to be good at mending the broken subject, one must have been badly broken too.Kiah reckoned I'm a psycho...of which, aku dengan hati terbuka nya menerima kejian nista kau itu...but, kalau lah aku tak psycho, kau pikir, aku boleh ke bekerja dengan MH patient ini? Or shall we re word this as, the professional with the highest passion on his/her job? To be a lawyer, I believe the person have got to be manipulative...I said this to my lawyer friend yang pastu terus dah tak nak cakap dengan I.

It's nothing personal lah...it is just an adaptation of a character, ada orang boleh bawak, ada orang belajar sampai 3rd pastu fail...siapakah orang ittew?

I am an avid fan of Alan Sugar's 'The Apprentice'. To become a successful businessman, you have got to have that domineering streak and shrewd. But orang business often mistaken shrewd for criminal. My point is, yes, lawyers is manipulative...that is how you get things done...but although manipulative will remain a character, what you believe is totally different thing. If you believe bad is bad, then it is bad.Take tukang gantung...person specification...muka and character kena garang and believe that silahabau yang akan digantung memang patut kena gantung...but they can always be a good family man and friend with a kind heart.

So, salah ke ada bad streak?

But, apa kena mengena nya dengan 'It's Too Late' ni? Takde apa-apa...

Come Clean Solution

Cik Kiah, ibu beranak dua yang femes di Lembah Klang itu, remarked in my tag board about the previous post.Apakah moral dari kisah separa sedih I ittew?

Well,Cik Kiah yang dikasihi oii...semenjak bila pulak posting-posting dalam blog I ni bermoral? Boleh dikatakan semuanya mempunyai unsur-unsur hasutan, enough for the cybercop to detain me under tah hapa-hapa ISA act.Takde satu pun boleh dijadikan iktibar. But since you asked, I think the slightest idea of suggestion from the posting is that...kalau hati dah terluka,sakit.benci ataupun yang sewaktu dengannya, maka buatlah keputusan mengikut kata hati and bukan nasihat orang.Sebabnya, hati sakit, sendiri yang tahu.Although nasihat-nasihat berguna will not go amiss, yang kena menanggung consequences ialah diri kita sendiri sendirian berhad. So, is that good enough for you, Ma'am?

My patient at the new workplace asked for a private chat with me today. Pakcik ni suka lari dari rumah pi ngisap ganja katanya...and akan hanya kembali kepangkal jalan (ermm..meaning the house) bila dia terhoyong hayang tepi jalan and kena angkut dengan Police.So, kami-kami nilah yang kena pergi menjamin sebab kalau tak dijamin, maka ke hospital bahagia lah jawabnya...but lately ni, semenjak I selalu buat pep talk dengan dia, jarang pulak dia lari.I cakap kat dia, kalau you nak hisap ganja hisaplah..tapi jangan hisap dalam bilik you nanti bilik you terbakar pulak.I think, he is so used to people judging him and when comes to me, I selamba je kata...nak hisap ganja, hisap lah...and that psychology works...because dia dah start

1) Mandi

2) Makan and

3) Bersosialan dengan patient lain.

Si Pakcik ni tak kasi I take note, takut I gi report kat psychiatrist katanya...but I cakap dengan dia, I need to take note anyway so that I can remember things better.

Dia tanya I how to come clean about a guilty secret (mak datukk..part ni paling lah I tak gemar tau...pasalnya, most of the guilty secret yang aku dengar semuanya kejam-kejam belaka that I have to report...but be mindful jugak, kenkadang secret they all semuanya buatan sendiri as in karangan sendiri...so, buang karan aje kan?)

So, I decided to play it safe. I let him talk but selalunya, jantan kalau ada rahsia, dia akan simpan sampai mati...lainlah kita pompuan ni kan....kalau boleh iklan dalam Berita Harian cerita kain dalam, harus kaya NSTP. Si Pakcik kata he can't take it anymore as the secret is killing him but on the other hand, confession can mean more trouble ahead, so dia nak mintak pandanganlah ni. Selalunya I will ask...'apa rahsianya, bang...cerita la kat I'. But I think 'I raped my own mother' tu enough to put me off mendengar confession-confession gila babi orang-orang ni.

My suggestion to him was not to be selfish. Dia tanya..kenapa lak Makji cakap camtu? I pun explain la..no matter what is your transgression, the first thing to decide before you decide to confess is whether it will help anyone apart from you. Think about how it will affect people who is involved, sebabnya..clean conscience isn't always a best reason to confess. I know this guy from school, he forced himself to this girl yang dia syok gila. This girl pulak dalam benci-benci tapi rindu githoo...so, it happened. This girl was shattered but didn't reported it sebab malu or for whatever reason. Years later, this guy, agaknya dah join Al-Arqam and terus lah nampak cahaya kebenaran...pergi la confessed dia rog pompuan ni. Hah!!! Enough said...sampai bercerai pompuan ni dengan laki nya and it caused a lot of hurt feelings to plenty people. Kesimpulannya, pengakuan dibuat atas sebab nak clear kan conscience....so, kalau nak clear conscience, bukankan kau patut mintak mahap kat pompuan tu rather than mengompang kat orang ramai yang kau tu perogol bersiri? Ciss..sel pish sungguh!!!

This lead to another suggestion to confess quickly, and tak payah lah kau nak tunggu 40 tahun or sampai kau dah kena throat cancer or dah tertelan ikan pari baru nak ngaku...'ayaaa..unuhhh...ia....uhukuhukuhukuhuk...' pwekkk, terus muntah darah and kena cardiac arrest!!! It is best to come clean quickly as possible, however terrifying it may be.Very often it is not the deed itself that's upsetting, but the deceit that followed it. Confessing quickly also keeps the situation in your control.You might not want to hurt the other person, but imagine how much worse it would be if they found out later on through someone else. (Aduihh..terasanya diri ini...)

Another we might want to consider ialah tatasusila.Practise lah what you're going to say...gunalah ayat-ayat yang macam lengkong.Bear in mind that grand announcement might not be the best approach.Takde guna organise family dinner, panggil the whole family and announce that you fell in love with your adik ipar.Kau ingat ni Eastenders ke? If you're not sure how the other person will respon to your confession, introduce the subject gently and see how they feel.They may be far more or far less sensitive to situation, which will affect how you handle it. Don't ever do this at your sister's wedding ke, majlis adik bersunat ke...'Abah...6 bulan lepas, kak Long and boipren Kak Long buat project kat dalam reban ayam belakang rumah...Kak Long bertobat Abah.....'. You may feel that honesty is best policy and owning up is grand...tapi, tengok tempat lah ek?

I think we all should be prepared that semua pengakuan ada consequences nya.Saying sorry might ease your guilty conscience, but it may not be enough to truly make amends.If you confessed to your flat mate that you ate her Cabdury Whole Nut giant bar...bersedialah, maka that is probably the last time you'll be eating her chocolate and be prepared to be accuse of the same everytime ceklat dia ghaib dari dalam fridge. You far more better off cakap kat your flat mate yang tikus bawak lari...semua orang bahagia.

Sekian.

Bila Hati Dah Patah...

***Cerita ni ada kena-mengena dengan orang hidup and orang yang dah mati***

I was reading the Sun newspaper today...(alaa...suratkhabar yang ada model Page 3 tu la..semua pompuan pakat-pakat tunjuk blow up breast masing-masing tu) Tah macam mana, tiba-tiba hati tergerak nak baca the Dear Deirdre column tu, yang ala-ala Cik Sri Siantan.Problem mat salleh ni semuanya ganas-ganas belaka,ada affair dengan mak,nenek, makcik or adik kakak girlfriend sendiri lah, affair dengan receptionist or secretary kat opis la...bini jiran sebelah la...selagi ada pompuan/jantan yang sedia rela untuk di kongket semuanya boleh jadi and the day after, mulalah rasa gundah gulana and terus tulis surat kat Deirdre ni.

The problems and questioned asked is all so similar, like whether or not si mangsa penipuan ni patut maafkan and terima balik si pemangsa yang masa kongket tak ingat dunia.I think 8 out of 10 will forgive tapi tak forget and 2 out of 10 will fuck off the relationship for good. The number of people that forgive ni selalunya ramai, chenta lah katakan, walaupun hati membara.The one that fuck off and forget selalunya akan berdepressed lah sepanjang zaman mengenangkan nasib malang, why me? why me?

Sebagai mangsa penipuan kekasih lama yang sangat ku chenta...2 kali pulak tu, this subject remain the hardest for me even offer my opinion, let alone nak advice orang.

The first time, ramai betul yang nasihat supaya lupakanlah si Shamsul tu...ye lah, masa tu I makan pun tak lalu.Friends reckons that it is a clean cut case, he married another woman, good enough reason untuk kau ctrl-alt-del kan from your kepala hotak.But he was my first love, although takdelah perfect nya...and bila pikir2 balik, all the years together, aku ni yang sebenarnya macam a stagnant perigi and he is like a wheeled timba and bebas mengambik air kat perigi-perigi yang lain.

But, trusting my own judgement that I know him too well all our years together, there goes our 2nd attempt together, only to be hit with more heartbreak.

In 35 years, I only ever loved one man...(Raja Nazrin tak kira okay?) he is dead now but towards the end, I know that despite all the penipuan he committed, he still feel the same about me.Things just didn't happen the way we want it.

Ada gak orang tanya, Hjh Esah oii..you dok cakap pasal dia aje, nampak sangat still holding a torch.Jawapannya, memanglah...lampu suluh memanglah dah terpasang since zaman MRSM lagi...ada zaman malapnya...tapi lampu tetap menyala.He was single before his death, which I have known for a while.Kiranya, bolehlah nak mencuba kali ke 3.

I guessed what it is, is whether or not I can live with my conscience, dengan jantan yang kata chenta kat I, tapi dalam chenta-chenta, tergamak sungguh menipu diriku yang suci ni.Ciss!!!

You often read about a person emotional struggle, whether or not to give their relationship another go, for the sake of it.This is not something accidental like, Diet Coke kena spike pastu berlaku lah segala perkara yang curang, or secretary super gedik yang jenis will come on to your husband gila-gila punya.You are able to consent an affair, be it emotionally or sexually.So, sudah-sudahlah nak bagi alasan 'I don't mean it like that'.You damn right know what it mean or what it can lead to in the first place.

Understandably, we can't cope with loss.Especially if its orchestrated.It makes it harder.I think, the moment we realise that is not quite right and we started to fell different about it, as a human, we should really start grieving.Part of the grieving process is saying things that you've never said.

When Shamsul cheated on me the first time, I know I can no longer feel the same about him.I just follow my heart because I loved him.I have another lifeline when I agreed to have a second go with him.That in some weird way made it bearable.

My current partner knows how much I love my chenta agung.It seems unfair emotionally.But when your heart is shattered, it really takes your feeling to a different place, where love will stay but whether it will be strong enough to withstand the complexity of the relationship,only your heart will tell.

Susah...bila hati dah patah ni.

Pesanan Kemanusiaan

Sebelum Makji berkompang dengan panjang lebar nya, ni nak le mengucapkan takziah kat all the Chelski/Chelsea supporter, atas kebangangan Drogba kerana dia dengan tak malu nya gi menampar tahsapasapa MU player tu and dapat red card dan menyebabkan si defender nya yang gaji dekat sejuta sebulan tapi nak gi hairdresser pun tak mampu, si John Terry yang kaki pengkar sepak penalty pun tak lepas!!!!!

Sebagai penyokong Arsenal dan juga kekasih sulit Emmanuel Adebayor, I tak heran la siapa kalah ke, siapa menang ke...tapi sebagai tanda simpati kat sorang lagi kaki pengkar penalty tak lepas Frank Lampard yang baru 2 minggu menjadi anak piatu pasal mak nya mati, it would be nice if Chelsea win, for Frank Lampard.Tapi, dah takde rezeki kan?

Actually kan, I ni nak buat pengumuman plus peng kutukan kat certain-certain orang yang kononnya live above board githoo...laki kaya raya...shopping setiap masa.Tapi tak jadilah, takut nanti naik syok pulak I kutuk sedar2, ada yang sakit ati and tetiba, aku pulak yang kena santau.

Tapi macam nak kutuk jugak lah sikit2.Orang kata, style one must possess and can never be bought.So, with hubby earning 30-40k sebulan, shopping nak rak kat segala mall dalam dunia ni pastu siap kompang kau-kau lagi kat orang.You can wear $500 worth of shoes but still tak jugak transformed into Girls Aloud.You can dressed your baby of segala mala designer kit tapi tetap gak budak tu comot macam baru lepas main tepi longkang...

See, Victoria Beckham pun tak cerita kat orang anak dia pakai baju brand apa...or how much DB made monthly.

Shall I say, over berlagak not allowed la kak oii...sungguhlah desperate hoswipe nya!!!

Lastly, sesapa yang suka pinjam duit kawan tu, ingat-ingat lah nak bayar balik ye?

Taraa...(eh..aku cakap pasal siapa ni, Kiah?)

Facebook Response

Ni nak bagitau kat orang yang baru lepas beranak tu...udah-udah nak buat demand tak menentu ye, tak baik. Dah le akhlak masa mengandung macam Britney Spears, ni dah keluar anak pun, akhlak macam Amy Winehouse.

Tapi, nasib baik lah chenta kan? Maka ku turuti kehendak mu yang rakus itu. Nak hapdate sangat...ni hapdate lah ni. Since kau pun tak pernah bertanya apa khabar diriku, ni nak bagitau lah yang aku ni tengah ber demam.Sok sek sok sek githoo..sambil menunggu kopok bantal yang tak tiba-tiba dari Post Opis Putrajaya...

Disini jugak, I nak ucapkan selamat menjaga kesihatan diri kat Budak Convent Seremban kat Negara gagak tu.Sakit tekak tak leh nak menelan katanya..tapi, telan benda lain boleh kan?

Cik M kita, dimana jua awak berada, this is the answer to your question....yakni, macam mana cara nak mengatasi and how to cope with a pathological liar and kaki kebas kat opis you.I have to say that I am no expert but hopefully, my thoughts make sense.

Pencuri ni biasanya mencuri because they really wanted the thing that they have stolen. Ni category pencuri berhemah pasalnya, they don't strike that often and they will only steal if the desire to own what they can't afford presses their naughty nerve.Long time ago, my brother was apprehended (ni tak termasuk kena terajang macam nak mampos dengan my father) because dia telah mengebas Game & Watch (permainan mahal nak mampos yang femes di tahun 80an, sebelum wujud nya playstation bagai) our neighbour.

Kesian my brother.Game & Watch that time cost about $48.00. Boleh katakan budak-budak jantan kat Taman Perumahan yang kitorang duduk tu ada Game & Watch sebutir sorang.Papai lah, Miki Maus lah, Oktopus lah...many types of games. I can only suspect that my parents thought that spending $48.00 for a game is way too expensive when they can easily buy Snake & Ladder game for $3.00, plus alasan klasik mak bapak taknak beli dango** (Lizs, kitak tolong explain apa makna dango ya) is that nanti lalai tak nak belajar.

My point is, his motivation to steal is because he wants it and in normal circumstances, he can't have it. So he resort to steal.Macam ni pun bahaya jugak, because it show an abnormality in a person behaviour.Yes, you have reason for the action but the failure to understand this is still wrong and criminal is highly questionable.My brother carry out his abnormal thoughts, which at that age is forgivable since kau pun budak lagi, cannot comprehend the consequences (but I am sure he has after kena belasah dengan father) But still, if you still can't understand why certain things is unjust, maka adalah ketidak seimbangan chemical dalam badan.

Cik M is experiencing an office thief, yang before dah kena tangkap and lepas tu dah bersumpah demi Allah tak nak re offend tapi tetap jugak mencuri.What can we make out of this? It is very obvious that this thief is not a kleptomaniac, since dia dah mintak maaf and bersumpah bagai. Kleptomaniac selalunya tak boleh register what they do in an instant but shortly afterwards, baru sedar yang dia dah mengambil barang tanpa permission and had to carry out still because they just can't cope with the consequences being caught.

For the non-kleptomaniac orientation ni, the obvios reason ialah they know what they're doing and they're aware of what is expected of them bila tertangkap and masa tu, dengan automatic nya, dia akan bersumpah mengalahkan Comissioner Of Oath promising sun and moon yang dia tak kan mencuri lagi.It is pathogical since there's no way of stopping and it's kind of built in their blood stream.The only way to stop them is potong tangan aje...as that will be the indication to them psychologically and blatantly to stop stealing. Although this is not a guarantee yang mereka-mereka ni will no re offend. Takde tangan, boleh mencopet pakai kaki pulak nanti.

I am afraid, until they have comprehensive psychoteraphy that will make them realise and rationalise, si pencuri-pencuri habitual ni tak kan berubah. So Cik M, my advice to you ialah, bila you keluar lunch ke hapa, silalah kunci pintu opis, all your cabinet drawers and jangan lupa bawak handbag sekali. Simpan ayat kursi ke hapa tak kan menjadi, pasalnya pnecuri-pencuri yang macam ni telah men brainwash diri masing-masing yang they all tu masih ada masa nak bertaubat nasuha.

Sekian. Hope this helps.

Agony...Part 2

Maka Dr Mahathir pun dah keluar UMNO sebagai tanda protest to tiDOLLAH. What should I say...,entah lah.I don't know why tiDOLLAH bother, the job is very stressful and he is certainly not very good at it.If there is an opportunity to blah and still get hefty pension, pergi ajelah kan?

Then came the loyal supporter...or shall I say, the ardent boot licker.Nak tunjuk taat setia pun berpada-pada lah...si loyal supporters ni bukannya under educated macam I ni, semuanya pandai but is this just an act of desperation? Semua bangsa duduk atas pagar.Waste of space betul.

The situation in my other work place pun begitu jua.This Demoted Manager, walaupun tak pernah lagi kena tangkap tido dalam opis, she might as well be labelled as sleeping on the job, hypothetically speaking.Dah le pemalas, kebijaksanaan nya sungguh diragui (and this made me sound like super duper bongkak)

I tried to make connection with her emotionally but kesudahannya, I yang rasa macam nak pengsan and geram sungguh dengan kebodohan melampai batas nya tu.

I really don't feel good about this. I'm sure if my nature contributes to how I really feel or this is just a bad thing to do.I took over her job.The resentment from her is so clear.I told her that this is not personal, I shouldn't really said that but somehow, I feel I should because for some reason, I am consumed with guilt...padahal pada dasarnya, she lost her job because she is not up to standard.

Things get really difficult each day, I hounded her like a wild animal, pointed out her mistakes blatantly.I keep telling Boss that this made me feel bad.Boss cakap, if you ask them to do their job then, that is not wrong.Betul lah tu, Boss tapi I started to feel like a big bully, knowing that DM ni takdelah sepandai mana (mak datuk..terserlah kebongkakan ku) but keep on expecting that DM will do wonders.

CPB kata, let find more evidence to get rid of DM. This is business, when you can't deliver, there goes you.DM cannot deliver and I agreed with CPB that she should be sacked. Tapi, I pulak rasa bersalah...everytime I look at DM, rasa nak cakap aje...sudah sudahlah, janganlah nak melawan Boss lagi.Do yourself a favour and step down, your standing ground is wobbly.I heran betul, setelah si DM puas mengadu domba kat CPB katanya I ni tak pernah berpuashati dengan her work dan tak termasuk gossip liar yang ditaburnya untuk memburukkan nama I, I still feel so kesian and hoping that CPB tak sack dia, transfer her to another level and just let the able one work.But si DM ni, arrogance nya boleh tahan...

Betul lah orang cakap kan...your greatest enemy is your own conscience.I am struggling and I don't know if I can live with it.Semua orang cakap kat I, kalau si DM tu kena pecat, tu salah dia sendiri...tapi tah macam mana, aku pulak lah yang terasa aku nilah penyebab utamanya.Adoiii!!!!

I strongly believe in retribution.Takut jugak bila memikirkan kalau lah Makcik ni berdendam kesumat dengan I, maka suatu hari nanti, aku akan dapat balasannya.We never know...hari I ada kuasa, besok segala-gala boleh ghaib dari mata.Siapa tahu?

How I wish I don't accept the challenge in the first place.Emotionally I am so very weak.Dia ada anak kecik pulak tu...

CPB asked me to decide if I want to take the promotion.Mula-mula macam nak jugak...tapi bila pikir balik, duit banyak hati kelabu asap pun tak guna juga...

Macam mana nak masuk The Apprentice ni, Hjh Leemah oii?

Agony...Part 1

Ohh..hari guru kan, hari ni?

Well, to my sister yang mengajar kat Sekolah Budak-Budak Bohsia kat Shah Alam nun...Happy Teacher's day lah hah? Padan lah muka kau..siapa suruh buat TESL dulu...kan ke dah kena jadik cikgu?????

I am a bit liat dalam update mengupdate blog ni...bukan apa you all, first nya...laptop MB dah kena hantar service.Sudahlah sidua orang tu tak ber laptop,maka I yang baik hati ni kasilah pinjam laptop I.Maka, I pun terpaksa bergantung harap kat office computer.Ni lah padahnya browsing internet sambil ber hisrok kan? Puas dah ku nasihat...jgn hisap rokok masa pakai pc...but towards the end, bagi nasihat kat MB serupalah macam bagi nasihat kat Amy Winehouse or Pete Doherty supaya jangan isap dadah...bak air lalu aje laa...

Ni nak cerita lah kat you all.Sebelum I gi berchotti that day, I pun buatlah lawatan muhibbah sekejap kat workplace number 2 kat Harlesden, area gagak tak bertamaddun tu, Manal oii...tak kan kau tak tau? Kurang ajar tak I? Ada unsur-unsur racism lak kan?

If I'm being honest, which I am..brutally...I always find gagaks is a racist git themselves.Talking about being discriminate by the Putihs...yang obviousnya, gagaks always made themselves stood out for a wrong reasons, pastu tuduhlah orang lain unfair la..tu la ni la....

Adalah sorang council Registrar ni...job description kata Registrar ni one of the responsibility nya kenalah mengahwinkan sesiapa aje yang nak kahwin kat Registrar Office tu.Civil Partnership ceremony is included.Tup-tup, The Registrar, wanita gagak yang boleh tahan jugak la religiousnya, refused to perform the Civil Ceremony for 2 mamat ni....(ayo..kesian kan...jantan selalunya liat nak diajak kawin...bila dah nak kahwin sangat, tak dibagi kebenaran gitu...cesss) Kata wanita gagak ni, as a Christian, harammmmmmmmmmmm !!!! And because of that, she refused to do her job yakni me register kan civil partnership kat 2 jantan ini. Nak jadikan cerita nya (nak jadi cerita apa...memang dah jadi pun) kawan-kawan se opis pompuan gagak ni, macam dah tak happy la...(katanya sigagak ni lah) and she claimed that her work colleague treated her badly, singled her out...dah tak nak minum kopi sesama gittew....

So, wanita gagak ni rasa ter pressure sangat (pressure hapa nya..kalau orang tak nak minum kopi dengan kau..kau gi lah minum sensorang) maka she had no choice but to leave.And now she is suing the Council (surprise..surprise) on the ground on discrimination based on religious belief.

Okaylah....look at her point of view, as a Christian, same sex marriage haram lah kan.But this is a job.Religious belief aside la..she could have been more subtle...tak yah lah terang-terangan discriminate si jantan 2 orang ittew.After all, this is UK, same sex marriage is already legal.Lainlah kalau kat Paroi Jaya kan? But knowing the gagak...to get their point across (especially dalam part-part homophobia ni) kalau satu dunia boleh tahu, lagi bagus.Talking about discrimination kan?

In line of work, our hands are tied sometimes.But there is always a choice.

Okaylah...since I dah melalut sangat (janji nya nak cerita pasal my trip to the other workplace kat Harlesden tu) let me tell you what happened to me on that lovely Saturday, 2 days before I jet off to Isle Of Sicily.A day earlier, hati I memang dah panas ni pasalnya I dapat tahu telepon opis dah kena potong (pasal HQ lambat bayar bil) and si Demoted Manager (DM) ni boleh buat McDonno and tak report kat I pun.Berhempas pulas lah I gi buat call sana sini and kesudahnya bayar bill telepon dengan my own money and si Puaka DM, boleh buat tak tau, padahal I dah put her in charge.

So bila I jumpa dia that Saturday, I pun tanyalah...kenapa you tak bagitau I? You tau tak, kalaulah ada emergency, macam mana orang nak call you? DM masih lagi menunjukkan muka McDonno nya kat I.Dalam pada dia tahu I tengah hot/bengang tu, boleh pulak dia buat last minute request nak mintak balik awal.I pun kata, apsal you selalu buat request last minute? Dia boleh kata dia tak nampak rota...padahal benda tu dah terpampang atas dinding.So, I pun start la cakap..eh, you tak boleh buat macam ni..blablabla...and selamba badaknya, dia blah je from the opis.I pun cakap la...don't walk away when I'm talking to you.Nak tahu dia buat apa? She kissed her teeth at me...gagak silent way to say PakYu gittew...

Wah..bertambah panas darah ke...I cakap balik, Don't kiss your teeth at me.Terus dia menjerit kat I, why are you quarelling with me...(eh, siapa yang cari gaduh ni?) Terus dia cakap kat I, I'm older than you, be careful when you talk to me. Boleh tak, melawan boss macam tu?

I left earlier than expected that day...it must have been 5 minutes after I left and I was told, laki si DM ni datang kat unit, sambil menjerit-jerit cari I.Katanya, mana Hjh Esah ni? Apasal dia suruh bini aku kerja lebih-lebih ni...ohh!!!

Boleh tak? Panggil laki dia serang I kat opis.Nasib baik I dah balik, kalau tak...haruslah aku berperang mulut.But knowing me yang penakut sungguh ni, ada yang mati sakit jantung kat opis nanti.

When I came back, I terus bagitau Boss si CPB tu.CPB punyalah marah...terus bagi dia warning.Dia sekarang ni ada sebulan to shape up.Or else, she will be ship out.

Ohh Bosss...aku chenta padamu.

I was really shaken after that...and I think that is why, I haven't been writing. I do feel uneasy about the whole thing.But I'll tell you about it soon.

Tarraaa....

Untuk Tatapan Hjh Leemah

Mak datukk...ada ke orang nak makan kat kedai ni?

Ferry to Gozo Island,Malta

Mediterranean Sea from the Catamaran

Island of Malta from the Catamaran