About Me

Monday, November 06, 2006

After 7

Where To Go?





Troubled soul.Who is? Myself lah.I was baby sitting the whole night on Saturday.Sunday pulak kena attend birthday party and today,not a even a second to spare to 'mengular-ular' diri kat office.Teramat lah sibuknya.Mind you, I do not hold a 'usual' job.My job depends on the wind blows and sometimes, the moon.Too much psychoanalysing since last Thursday.Manalah jiwa tak kacau Izuan oiii...

The big bang fireworks everywhere celebrating the crucification of Guy Fox didn't help at all.People seems to think the bang only affecting animal.It does the same to human.Especially yang tengah berjiwa kacau macam aku ni.I heard a conversation between 2 builders today, complaining that the fireworks noises is somehow 'disturbed' their bedroom affairs.Ada jugak jantan-jantan yang sensitive yang masih wujud dimuka bumi ni.

Secretary garang is away in Nottingham Forest until Friday that left me the chance to melaram with her Mini.Sedap wo...

I would like to thank you that is ever so concern about me.Frankly, I am in pieces.You remember that feeling where you don't know whether you're going or coming? That feeling is as similar as what I'm feeling now.It gets hard enough to make you feel like switching off for good.I am wearing this protective shield at work where what you feel inside have to separate from what you look outside.But this gear will wear out by bedtime where I will just cry and cry myself to sleep and wake up very,very puzzled.

I'm just doing what 'After 7' advised me to.You know that song 'Til You Do Me Right'?
But I know me better than anyone.There is still a bit in me that is so soft like 'isi ketam'.

I wish to explore the subject of insecurity further.And I'll tell you more about my findings when I found one.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Begitulah resam relationship...ada kala turun ada kala naik..bagi sesetangah org selalunya turun sampai nak naik tangga balik dah tak larat dah... so, I guess it's a good thing to give both of you a good rest from this whole relationship thingy. Susahlah chenta antarabangsa nih...even Avang pun kengkadang susah nak memahami certain things we do!

But I am hoping to seea more cheerful you this weekend, darling :)

Have a great day tomorrow xx

lekiu said...

Relationship macam tu lah. Susah nak manage. I suppose in our search for the right partner to spend the rest of our lives with, we have to be brave enough to suffer heartbreaks with the believe that the search would eventually bear a fruitful and very fulfilling result.

Dulu when I was searching for someone and I had to go through heartbreaks, I used to remind myself that Hitler dan Genghis Khan yang gila pun finally found someone.....

Hang in there Han. There must always be a rainbow at the end ... somewhere. In the words of the wise Master Yoda, Patience my young Padawan warrior..

Belladonna said...

Nok, kita sekapal. Aku pun tengah jiwa kacau gak :(

Anonymous said...

Kan??? let's console each other... mak ni pun nampak ceria tapi masalah berlambak, voley?? :P Oh well, everything can be solved..except death...setiap penyakit/ masalah ada solutionnya except kematian katanya..betul tak?

We have circle of friends and I think we should use it fully to make us lead a happier life, kan?? :)

Take care

Julie said...

Hi Han..

I've been reading your blog from a distance for my daily therapy and can't help it that you're now under the weather. I can always say, I've been there, and know how it feels, but it won't mean a thing to you.

I believe there's always a new door when one is closed. It's just a matter of when we decide to open the next. I'm glad you have great friends to support while you find that path.

Hope this helps in some sort of way..

Han said...

Hey all,
Trimakaseyyyyyy (spit the Alleycat's attitude)

I'm so glad I know all of you.I guess ppl like me,find their comfort in ppl like u.

Marilah kita ber 'comfort-comfort' an.Remember, disebalik aksi aksi seram ganas (Bella), aksi-aksi of a sexual nature (Lee Diva) dan aksi aksi sarkis (Me), ada tersimpan hati yang koyak rabak...

Well, machinist...any takers?