Closure Of The Enclosure?

I wonder if orang-orang lelaki melayu kita ni teramatlah mementingkan semangat perkahwanan lebih dari Playstation 2 diorang tu? They'll do anything for mates and tak kisahlah kalau kena sembur ridsect sekalipun, as they said, 'He is my mate, I'll do anything...' .Well, read on.

If you scroll back, you may have read about how I painstakingly trying to avoid my school friends kerana semuanya mempunyai pertalian air liur dengan ex boifren aku itu. Pertalian air liur ? The needs of bertegur-tegur sapa, bertanya-tanya khabar and berforward-forward email hatta joke bangang sekali pun. Ni lah susahnya bercinta monyet, pasalnya, salah satu dari hobby monyet ni ialah bergantungan bersama-sama, satu kisah cinta, seluruh perkampungan monyet akan tahu.Dah itulah nasibku.

My feelings for that bloody monyet has long gone (I still beg to differ) and he the monyet dah pun selamat sejahtera living comfortably in his sanctuary. He should stay put and jangan lagi menunjukkan mukanya kat I. Late last year, I accidently ter keep in touch pulak dengan another monyet and he is also a best friend si monyet celaka ini. Although I thought, okaylah...kita sama-sama dah tua, jodoh dah tak ada, maka tak ada apa-apa lagi yang patut dikesalkan, I replied his mail and when he was in London for a business trip, I took up the opportunity to meet up. On his email to me, si kawan ni tanpa ditanya teruslah update I pasal cerita monyet bekas boifen ku itu. Keluarlah cerita yang monyet tu dah menduda...(padan muka lu) and that the duda monyet pujaan Malaya tu is keen to keep in touch dengan I. (Eh...kenapa plak cari I, kahwin lah dengan si Sofea Jane & Julia Rais tu) Katanya nak berkawan-kawan. Well, mulut I nak je cakap, gi lah berkawan dengan monyet lenlain kan..tak dapat kawan dengan monyet pun, kawan lah dengan gorilla, cikah, siamang and any similar species. But we human are blessed with the ability to hold the told and untold version of stories. Politely I bagitau si kawan ni, tak payah keep in touch lah...bukannya boleh jumpa pun....tapi, hati ni macam kena garu je nak cakap benda yang tak keluar dari mulut...as in cadangan supaya monyet celaka itu melebarkan sayap perkahwanan nya dengan species-species monyet yang disebutkan tadi.

I was being very honest to tell this kawan that although me and monyet idaman Malaya tu dah takde apa-apa, I will always remember him as a very special person. 10 years bersangkutan atas pokok bersama-sama (walaupun in between dia ada affair dengan monyet lain) mana boleh lupa macam tu saja kan? And because of that, I strongly feel that we shouldn't keep in touch. I'm not sure lah pulak by saying that, I have inadvertantly ter suggest kat kawan ni, that giving him the impression yang I masih ada hati lagi kat monyet idaman Malaya tu.

Sekarang ni, monyet idaman Malaya tu dah ada email address I, thanks to his mate yang that day masa aku belanja dia makan toasted salmon bagel, dah bersumpah demi Allah tak nak distribute my email address. Ni bukanlah tuduhan melulu, siapa lagi yang jadi Yellow Pages nya kalau tak si kawan ni? Something abouts boys, they are not good at keping secrets and doing their female friends a favour. Tapi, kalau cover lubang untuk puak-puak dia tu, jadi saja. And we the girls, selalulah yang terkedek-kedek cover kebuayaan jantan-jantan ni.

Getting email from the man who broke my heart to pieces is something I don't need at this precise moment. Why? Tak suka ke tengok aku happy? Tangan I gatal betul nak reply, sudah-sudah...you made your choices...tak yah lah nak tanya khabar nak apa-apa lagi. Blah lah. Bunyi macam hostile aje. Terlampau hostile kang dikata masih ada hati...tak pun, dituduh meroyan. Ni dah tahun 2007 ni, tak nak lah pulak dapat title Pompuan Tak Vouge kan? Macam mana pun ditinggal laki boifren, we all must lah maintain aksi-aksi, 1 pergi 1000 mari....walaupun hati nak pecah. Talking about getting wiser lah.. But at 34, you obviously can do better than when you're 24....I guess, if I am still 24, my reply to him will be this,

Dear Sam,

Ohoooo....kau dah bercanda dipasiran pantai dengan orang lain, sekarang baru nak kat aku balik ye? Podahhhh!!!

Sekian, Semoga kau mati dilenyek bas METRO. (Perlu ke ni)

But, on the other hand, this man was my rock, my shinning armour and the love of my life. I can't possibly send that kind of mail. But he hurt me so deep that one time, I tak mandi, tak makan (tak makan pun tetap tak slim) and tak pergi kerja. At this age with greener maturity, I may write this,

Sam,

It's been a long time. I am so touched that you have gone for all this trouble. It is nice to know that you are well and I'm sorry about XXXXXX. Well, I guess, something was just not meant to be. Whatever it is, I'm sure you are holding up well.

As much as I love to be in a speaking/writing term with you again, just like old time, I truly believe that our past is best to be left behind where we no longer can see or hear from it. We have both moved on. I have, although it is not the easiest thing to do. I will remember you in my thoughts however I rather not at all. This must come to an end.

Pecah kaca pecah gelas.....(ni memanglah tak perlu....)