Tuesday Thoughts

Kalau tak silap I, last week when I was at Weymouth, terbongkar lah kisah si Tua bangka from Austria tak sedar diri kubur kata mari rumah kata pergi kambing gurun bangsat..eh, cukup-cukup lah.Kang tak habis pulak posting ni dok nak menyumpah aje kan? Alaa..you know, that story about 73 yr old father who kidnapped his own daughter, forced her down into the cellar, persistently raped and abused her leading to the birth of her 7 children, dah mati sorang tapi dah kena buang masuk incinerator for the last 24 years.

For the life of me, I can't even begin to comprehend how it happened.Kalau boleh imagine pun tak nak.Begitu kijam nya.

Sekarang ni Si Tua tu pandai pulak nak kata yang kepala nya tak centre itulah yang menyebabkan dia jadik begitu (committing all these offences). Sakit betul hati I mendengar nya. Jantan memang macam tu lah kan...bila dah menyetan tu, mula la kata kepala ada sikit biol la, tak centre la...likened it to his manhood yang centrally positioned tu, macam lah takde excuse lain kan?

In my work, without given a choice, I have to work with a convicted paedophile yang kalau boleh jangan kata muka nya, yang itu-itu pun rasa nak ku potong masuk food processor.But my hatred for them will not beat my disgust to the puaka who melantak darah daging sendiri.Mana perginya perasaan kau pundek oi??!!!! (Hish..ni emosi gila babi ni...)

I think in Malaysia some years ago, adalah satu generation Datuk,Bapak and Abang dok merogol cucu,anak and adik kandung.Kalau lah si 3 beranak ni masih lagi tak kena gantung, patutlah justice system in Malaysia tu dilontar dengan telur busuk aje.

I have plenty of clients who was abused and raped by their own father, brother, uncle or apa aje segala sedara mara jantan they all.The effect on them as a person sungguhlah menyedihkan and I really salute those who emotionally has risen above it, sebab nya, susah sungguh nak move on apabila digasak oleh the love and the dependable one.

Rape is always about taking control for someone who unable to perform so emotionally.That seems always is the case.The predator always know the effect this may have on their victim and that bring ultimate satisfaction.

Boleh kata 9 out 10 jantan tak centre kata kat I dalam session-session teraphy they all, yang the best way to show frustration to woman is by raping or killing them.Ni yang tak centre, yang separa tak centre pulak akan membuli dan menyeksa bini or girlfren memasing cukup-cukup.Kalau boleh, 20 jam sehari tu perlu dihabiskan untuk stalking pompuan-pompuan lemah ni.Jantan, tak dapat control directly, remotely pun jadik.Puaka sungguh.

The children affected by the abuse is very much a damaged goods.Their mother was raped by the man they thought were the father but is actually the grandfather, in front of them.She was shunned away for 24 years, made to give birth alone 7 times and now, facing the world carrying her father's sin.How is she going to cope emotionally, tuhan aje lah yang tahu.

When I was working with the one of International Carrier, one of the office girl was raped by her father.Obviously, she was the topic of the relatives hot gossips.She moved away, father was sent to jail.She told me that her mother blamed her for her father's inprisonment.Already disheartened by the where the loyalty lies, she build herself slowly away from them.I can only imagine that being a victim of a sexual crime is not easy.It can scar you for life.Being done by the supposed protector is the hardest truth to swallow.This girl developed hideous attitude and wasn't well liked by the people at work.

If I know what I knew now, I would have different attitude towards her and maybe, I would try harder to be her friend rather than sympathising unconsciously of her tragedy.Because of how we were, she may never recover from that ordeal.

People always say that you can run, but you can't hide.But I think the truth is, you must hide your pain and keep on running from it.

If this make sense.