I Think I Know Where This Is Coming From...

Selepas puas bergundah gulana sensorang kat office sampai sakit badan, I decided to do some retail teraphy.So, dengan bongkaknya, after doing long day at work yesterday, I walked to Curry's and I bought myself a new steam iron yang ada kuasa magic and also boleh bertukar colour macam traffic lights. Wah, sungguh impressed nya.Tapi, gosok baju malas lah pulak.

Thank you all for the kind words. I wish I can say more about what's been bothering me, tapi memandangkan masalah ini masalah dalaman yang bakal mengecikkan hati orang-orang yang penting dalam rumah I, I kenalah diam-diam...walaupun hati ni macam nak menjerit-jerit.

On the other notes, I was a bit annoyed with Miss Nigeria, now when I come to think about it. I received her email, casually macam takde benda yang berlaku, and I was like, you are not at work still, with no valid reasons and you are still vague about whether you're coming back or not? Ni lah masalahnya, I take this too personal, masalah orang pun jadi personal issue to me sampai people can take advantage of me knowing how I would normally personally function.Thus making the act of professionalism hard to achieve. I tipu my boss kata dia demam and padahalnya, dia kena kurung pulak dengan bapaknya (katanya lah) and sekarang ni, will see if she can convince them to let her return to work. And I am expected to be this understanding person who care what the hell happened but apparently, the last to know. What about the personal responsibility? Tak ke mengambik kesempatan kat aku yang lemah ni? Why can't she just say, I need more time off ? People need to run a business here...and aku lah yang terkedek-kedek cover orang punya masalah sampai diri sendiri pun merana...celbed sungguh!!!

I replied her mail with the piece of my mind (that sometimes can be frankly vicious, although trying hard to get a point across) Harus dia kecik ati and akan berfeeling nak munuh diri lepas ni. Working and personal relationship works about the same, tak boleh commit, jangan commit.It is so unfair to string people along, giving them hope and provide uncertainties.I must admit, I applied a friendly relationship with my work colleague and in the past, it was more trouble than gain and there's always the dishonest one who takes advantage and manipulates.

I was critisised by Frankie for doing that, although upset, I do see the point and how wrong I was allowing personal feelings to cloud my professional action. Being a partner, I was rather upset to be critisised in such ways, yelah..kan ke nak bermanja-manja and mengadu-ngadu...and knowing that you wrong, how many more telling off can you take? Dari si chenta hati? We always have this thing about confiding in our love ones about our worries and problems.Because they care, they may say something that is true and it hurts, but as we see them in a loving lights, we will somehow, want to hear the truth, but hoping that the truth will come in a more alluring ways, like 'Oh..you are wrong Darling...but it's alright, I love you anyway'....something like that. But some people can't help it with their natural capabilities to make others feel like shit.

But, there is a lesson to learn, how we really should separate how we feel about the person...as a person we love and the things they do and say...like looking at David Beckham, thinking of him as this gorgeous person and separate the disgusting thought of his squeaky ducky voice. Boleh? People that we love the most selalunya banyak idea yang menyakitkan hati...tapi dek chenta, they are the same person we love and the same person who is annoying and deserved to push in the bath with a running hairdryer. Hambik kau!!!

My father, I honestly think that he is a nice person...a good son to his parents and a good father. However, whenever his angry, I can't help to think I am the one he hated the most.So is my partner.Some people are just not blessed with the good filter and good things that meant well can come out horribly.But nevertheless, the love is there and I, just have to take it. And I also realised, the more I talk about my father, the more I see him in me, yakni, bermulut puaka. Haiyoo..sorrylah Abah.