About Me

Thursday, June 07, 2012

Maka Kita Bukanlah Orang yang Berkuasa

I can be really, really wrong in this. But yes, I welcome all form of freedom of expression, opinion etc etc. And I must say, whilst you are granted this freedoms, you must also take some responsibility with it.

I read many Facebook entries, notes and what ahve you about people being so stressed with their weight and depressed over their newly 'balloned' figure. Some went to slimming centre tah pe benda but always comeback with perasaan nak lempang orang yang suruh depa start makan benda2 yang dalam list.

Apakah? You went there and just because they tell you don't do this and this and this..ko rasa nak lempang? Habis tu siapa yang kena buang lemak dalam badan? Amoi tu ke? No. Instead of taking the amoi seriously, we go and moan about how the beauty of life is being deprived from us. We cannot eat nasik lemak berkoyan, mengunyah jajan and minum all that extra fats ice blended haaramzadah shakes. Then mulalah buat statement yang menyedapkan hati dia macam..takpelah biar aku gems tapi aku bahagia. So, okaylah..ada ke orang kacau you kalau you gems? You jugak yang pi komplen kat seantero dunia ko rasa dah macam badak Farouk kan?

Then of course yang menyalahkan keadaan, lalu keadaan lah yang menyebabkan dia makan. Ohh please lah. Semua nya salahkan keadaan kan? Laki buat hal, kalau tak makan hati..kita bantai makan nasik (dan sebagainya)

You stress, you eat. As if I eat all my derita away. As if, if I eat more...things will get better. I will feel better. Yes, you felt better that your weighing scale will beg to differ.

Tu bab makan/stress/gemukgedempuls.

Then of course those yang merana jiwa dek chenta, relationship or anything that menyakitkan hati. Punya luahan jiwa yang kenkadang...ish, dah tahap meluat gua baca.

Some of you know that apart from kerja soSIAL ni, I am also a trained to deal with gravely depressed people. But this is not something I do fulltime. And I think I must tell you, people like us, we don't give advice. Because we are not suppose to.So sesapa yang stress and depressed gila yang rasanya kalau jumpa therapist/councellor lalu berfeeling segala masalah akan selesai, maka itu adalah permulaan yang salah. If your counsellor start giving advice, you need to stop your session immediately.

But of course dgn kawan2, I am ever ready to talk tak kira masa...yelah bila orang dah sebal kepalahotaknya dgn masalah ataupun ada something dalam hati yang takleh nak keluar, terbangun lah tengah malam kan? Honestly, orang yang mengadu tu sebenarnya tahu yang kebanyakan masalah mereka adalah disebabkan oleh mereka sendiri.

Err, macam infection control...host nya ada, tapi yang membuatnya jadi critical, kita lah kan?

Ada kawan I ni yang sedang bermasalah dgn lakinya. Hari-hari dia mengadu kat I. To the extend sampai I nak kesian kat lakinya. Wouldn't you, kalau orang dok ngata laki dia macam2..kadang2 benda yang dia cakap tu..something she can tell the husband herself but of course women never want to accept that telepathy is actually not working with jantan. We always assume...ye lah, kalau kita baik dgn orang, maka orang kena baik dgn kita. We think that this should be the rules of friendship where if we are good enough to share secrets, maka we can oversee any other practical things. Macam dgn laki, just because kita tido sekatil dgn nya, maka kita berpendapat bahawa, kalau kita demam secara automatik nya dia akan bawakkan sup ikan merah untuk kita. Where we will do exactly the same for him kalau dia pun dah nak mati. Ado? Nan hado. Sometimes we think we know people...but we actually don't. Just because you observed them day in day out, you know everything at the back of your hand.

Then another one, sokmo sakit hati dgn Boss nya. Dia ni bekerjalah bermati-matian untuk membuktikan dia tu pekerja cemerlang terbilang. Memanglah dia pekerja cemerlang terbilang but just because the Boss overlook some practical and vital things, dia kecik ati and marah2. Benda yang dia adu kat I semuanya, I think..had she directed it to the intended person, she would not got herself so wounded like that. I asked, did you tell her, jawab my friend ni, she should know whatt....

See...assumptions rules!

* Okay, ada ex schoolmate I yang semenjak dua menjak menjalin balik ikatan dgn I ni, berusaha bersungguh-sungguh untuk membawak I kejalan yang benar. Apa yang benar dan tak benar nya tak tau lah. One thing very obvious to her, is that I tak pakai tudung. And that I ni semayang pun...kalau balik kerja, I can qada' all prayers to Zuhur to Maghrib in one go. Now and again, she will send me all the link2 yang menunjukkan the azab I am about to get for tak pakai tudung. Dalam hati I cakap, kalaulah menghantar I link2 macam ni membuat dia happy, maka biarlah..dan semoga Allah bukalah hati I nak menutup aurat. But she just didn't stop at that...another text syarahan she sent me was, we have to pkasa ourselves to do things we don't like because at the end, akan timbul keredhaan. Like, kalau tak suka semayang, paksa diri tu semayang, paksa diri tu pakai tudung..paksa diri tu macam2..in the end, akan redha dan ikhlas.

Then of course those yang sungguh obsessed nak mengumpul pahala untuk dia selamat masuk syurga. Buat itu, buat ini. Some even take charge on some mission and enforce it on you. Some years ago, ada kawan I mintak I sedekah duit kat this mission to selamatkan orang Islam kat mana tah...and she said, by doing that I will build a jambatan emas for me in syurga. I told her, tak apa...I don't want that jambatan and I will not contribute.

I have never supported rumah anak yatim, bina masjid ke apa or sekolah pondok. Forgive me but I have less compassion for that cause. If the goverment boleh bina KLCC, Tower and tugu to remember all them people, I am sure they can build mesjid and suraus too. Katanya nak jadi negara Islam, kan? To me I have always maintain that those who deserve my help are the disabled, because my help would enabled them. This is my opinion.

The problem I encounter in Malaysia and orang melayu ialah, all the pesakit mental are syaitan-infected and dgn doa kepada Allah aja lah yang boleh menyembuhkan nya. My friend's relative was sent to some Islamic Centre for the mentally ill. Yes, this place exist apprently. So off the man went ito isolation, dibawak sembahyang and mengaji and all those pengisian rohani stuff. I went to see him. He is as paranoid as hell and in his own words, he was told that there are no such things as sakit mental dalam islam and he needed to do what he is asked to do. His illness was neglected and ignore and what was picked up was his weirdness. Macam haram. Who would think Ustaz will tell such vulnerable man that his tangan and lidah will be maimed? And was the Ustaz thinking to tell an ill man that Allah hated his guts? Where is this Ustaz compassion let alone kepala hotak nya? If you nak bukak pusat jagaan 'orang yang disesatkan setan' ni kan ke patut you research dulu apa 'setan' itu? Then of course you say that the beauty of your effort is everything about you and your treatment is Islamic. But the Ustaz forgot the most important bit in the process, the patient itself. Macam Dr lah, kalau heboh sangat nak suruh org masuk syurga but lupa nak bagi treatment kat orang tu for his illness. mana person-centred nya? But in Malaysia, religion sells. *

Let's just sums up all af the above. The asteric bits. I may not look or sound religious. I have always said that religion is the way of life hence, it is a choice. No paksaan. My first religious teacher said that and I believe him. (I believe everything my appa said)

I think you can impose 'force' and 'informed choice' up to certain age. I was forced to do everything at the very young age. I needed to be forced because I can't think for myself. I think had appa forced me to cover up like all the anak orang Arqam, I may be a different ppl today. 

I think it is good that kita menyeru orang berdakwah. Menyeru and memaksa is two different things. Yes, tidak ada paksaan dalam Islam. Al Baqarah explains that and of course its is counter statement by through ayat Al Qahfi. Ada banyak ayat dalam Quran tu, but situkang sampai akan sampaikan mengikut definition dia. A friend told me, although takde paksaan, it will hurt our chances to masuk jannah if we don't try to spread the good. 

Malaysia has come out with fatwas dan ada yang tak masuk akal pun ada. Okay, some said, siapalah kita untuk mempersoal kan ke terrer an orang yang belajar agama ni sedangkan kita pun hit and miss. But, bukan kah kita juga boleh berfikir?

So all those yang against majlis muda-mudi..konon nya dgn adanya majlis yang takde nilai islamic tu, maka terjejaslah aqidah. You tak fikir kah, orang yg terjejas aqidah tu, dah mmg dari azali tak kuat aqidah nya? So are we saying that Muslim in Malaysia aqidah tak kuat lah? So in order to menguatkan aqidah...apa yg perlu kita buat? Melancarkan kempen paksa memaksa, buat fatwa yang tak masuk akal, interfere in people's life or hounding people's facebook wall dgn macam2 nasihat and asking people to change they way of life?

Does it work?

Maka berilah peringatan, kerana sesungguhnya kamu hanyalah orang yang memberi peringatan. Kamu bukanlah orang yang berkuasa atas mereka. (Qur’an Surat Al-Ghaasyiyah ayat 21-22)

Let's just try practical things.....kind words helps. 

psst. pengisian rohani is good for stressed out people. The ill need proper help. Just like the fat people on the top and the buta celik above, the nasihat for them to do good will always dibalas dgn the thoughts of rasa nak lempang. You came to my wall asking me to wear tudung, to sembahyang (eh..adakah kau duduk serumah dgn ku?) and beribadat like I am the most obvious sinners, is annoying. I believe I still have akal. Yes, I have been given peringatan and terima kasih, and the rest, let me talk directly to Allah. (Yes before you ask, I did private messaged this friend of mine to tell her this, armed with all ayat I lifted from the Quran)

I am sure Allah will reward you...all those dakwah you buat. Teruskan lah but never, never think that orang yang you rasa hidup mereka kurang makna agama tu, kosong.  

7 comments:

Boris Johnson said...

makji,

saya selalu confuse dgn malaysian. tak pakai tudung is like the biggest sin ever! tapi pakai kredit kad, which is obviously riba', ok lah pulak, kan? kan?

Mak Ngah Jijah said...

Mak Ji.

You have summed up what I feel inside. Kdg2 I rasa malu tgk these ppl dgn kotak donation ke hulu ke hilir esp yang make used of children. I am very sure there are may ways we can raise funds for the purpose selain drpd "meminta sedekah" ( as opposed to minta sumbangan).

Secondly, I always believe that iman, taqwa dan aqidah is set deep inside you and that nobody can take it away from you. Case in point, I visited a close(non-muslim) friend yang appa nya passed away, I visited them during the wake at the church. Itu kali pertama I masuk dan menyaksikan upacara mereka.

Does that experience make me a lesser Muslim? Hell, no. I am as steadfast in my faith before and after that. Bak kata pepatah, ular menyusur akar tak akan hilang bisanya.

IMHO, that is what is very wrong with (some of - lest I sound as if generalizing) our society. Sebab (for some of them) "iman/taqwa" mereka hanya for "show" disebabkan ikut-ikutan dan "tampalan" belaka - hence they cannot absorbed the true "working" , for lack of better word/term.

I have known, and in some cases thanks to blogging - the inside stories/pictures of these so-called serbanistas...they are no better, in fact in some cases they are worse.

In conclusion, as you said Islam is a way of life...but how many people understood it. My appa said kalau Rasulullah masih hidup lagi, he'd dressed up in suits as a businessman and fly Concorde to conduct his business...jubah and unta doesnt make up a Muslim persona. Itu culture...

Makji Esah said...

BJ rambut cantekk...dosa tak pakai tudung and dosa riba keledek card lain lah deknon. People do whatever that suits them.The alim one can declare that we should all live by Quran's teaching but choose what they want to emphasise and what to downplay. I think my point is, orang yang mengambil tanggugjawab nak berdakwah, tak boleh ambik satu and neglect the other yg sesuai utk dia. Macam kawan I ni, its okay for her to point out my dosa of tak tutup aurat when she constantly moan abt betapa dirinya jarang diservis oleh laki nya..eh sangat kan?

Mak Ngah Jijah ehh...
Sorry to say lah, majority of us org Islam yg melayu ni, kononnya guna Quran tu untuk imitate saja, bukannya nak interpret. Maka org lain salah, dan dialah yg betul nya.Macam when ppl quoted verse of Surah Al Taubah, bab bunuh-membunuh tu orang press lah kuat2, tapi tak nak baca context of the ayat, apa sejarahnya. Ni tak, they pick and choose what they want to know and read. They manufacture consent in Allah's name.

Anonymous said...

makji,

i remembered those days kat TI during orientation week, the first thing kakak seniors did were holding tudungs for the freshies to wear sblm masuk dorm. And told us its only for the suaikenal weeks and avoiding abg2 seniors kacau. I was like..omaigod? am i in a religious school or wat? i was a bit culture shock then, as someone from ex konben girls to mix ones.

Bila kita free hair lps that week, depa dok pandang2 me n the likes as rebellious aliens, pakat ramai2 boikot n called names. To me, bab tudung ni adalah personal matters dan keikhlasan. When we sincere and we know why we wearing it, we will respect others to make their own choices. Something u can't force people to follow what they oredi knew.

I do believe, people changed. They can change from bad to good and vice versa. As long as we know where we stand as a human and the faith we kept as a Muslim since birth. Nowadays, many like to playing god than human. Religion could be a good business too the way they see it.

ps: best taww u selalu update blog lately. i might not agree with some points but i like ur critical thinking n provocative mind. Thats the beauty of you. Cheers...

makorang

Makji Esah said...

Mak Orang...expressing thoughts over onslaught of persistent negativity should not be viewed as 'critical and provocative thinking'. I write what I like and think, it may not be right too. What exactly am I critical and provocative about? About ppl who has excessive self-righteous? Hmmm...musykil ni.

Anonymous said...

makji, what i meant was, you have ur own independent thoughts and mind which is good. Either way, it can approach a healthy discussions here.

Your readers may agree or disagree with certain issues you brought up. But, we tend to debate about it rationally w/o reasonable doubt. Different views and freedom of speech.

Bleh giteww, makji kusayang? :)

makorang

Makji Esah said...

mak Orang weh..then it be said...u got yr own mind la, tak? Because ppl dont just hv 'provocative and critical' mind over nothing. Say which, if we are talking about how karipap should be made, maka isu itu tidakklah menimbulkan kemarahan sejagat yakni, siapa suka kentang, they choose kentang, ayam ikan dsbg. I can be critical and get my thought provoked over issues I feel passionate about like..mental health and believe me, Islam. Hence I macam terperanjat la jugak uols kata kita 'critical and probokatip'. I enjoy gossips so things like that never though provoking me but I am so critical of retis yang masuk amnoh pun nak annouce, bunting pelamin pun announce...

But, I really do appreciate yr comments. I tend to choose my word carefully and delicious though, because who knows, I might end up eating it..kan?