Maka Kita Bukanlah Orang yang Berkuasa

I can be really, really wrong in this. But yes, I welcome all form of freedom of expression, opinion etc etc. And I must say, whilst you are granted this freedoms, you must also take some responsibility with it.

I read many Facebook entries, notes and what ahve you about people being so stressed with their weight and depressed over their newly 'balloned' figure. Some went to slimming centre tah pe benda but always comeback with perasaan nak lempang orang yang suruh depa start makan benda2 yang dalam list.

Apakah? You went there and just because they tell you don't do this and this and this..ko rasa nak lempang? Habis tu siapa yang kena buang lemak dalam badan? Amoi tu ke? No. Instead of taking the amoi seriously, we go and moan about how the beauty of life is being deprived from us. We cannot eat nasik lemak berkoyan, mengunyah jajan and minum all that extra fats ice blended haaramzadah shakes. Then mulalah buat statement yang menyedapkan hati dia macam..takpelah biar aku gems tapi aku bahagia. So, okaylah..ada ke orang kacau you kalau you gems? You jugak yang pi komplen kat seantero dunia ko rasa dah macam badak Farouk kan?

Then of course yang menyalahkan keadaan, lalu keadaan lah yang menyebabkan dia makan. Ohh please lah. Semua nya salahkan keadaan kan? Laki buat hal, kalau tak makan hati..kita bantai makan nasik (dan sebagainya)

You stress, you eat. As if I eat all my derita away. As if, if I eat more...things will get better. I will feel better. Yes, you felt better that your weighing scale will beg to differ.

Tu bab makan/stress/gemukgedempuls.

Then of course those yang merana jiwa dek chenta, relationship or anything that menyakitkan hati. Punya luahan jiwa yang kenkadang...ish, dah tahap meluat gua baca.

Some of you know that apart from kerja soSIAL ni, I am also a trained to deal with gravely depressed people. But this is not something I do fulltime. And I think I must tell you, people like us, we don't give advice. Because we are not suppose to.So sesapa yang stress and depressed gila yang rasanya kalau jumpa therapist/councellor lalu berfeeling segala masalah akan selesai, maka itu adalah permulaan yang salah. If your counsellor start giving advice, you need to stop your session immediately.

But of course dgn kawan2, I am ever ready to talk tak kira masa...yelah bila orang dah sebal kepalahotaknya dgn masalah ataupun ada something dalam hati yang takleh nak keluar, terbangun lah tengah malam kan? Honestly, orang yang mengadu tu sebenarnya tahu yang kebanyakan masalah mereka adalah disebabkan oleh mereka sendiri.

Err, macam infection control...host nya ada, tapi yang membuatnya jadi critical, kita lah kan?

Ada kawan I ni yang sedang bermasalah dgn lakinya. Hari-hari dia mengadu kat I. To the extend sampai I nak kesian kat lakinya. Wouldn't you, kalau orang dok ngata laki dia macam2..kadang2 benda yang dia cakap tu..something she can tell the husband herself but of course women never want to accept that telepathy is actually not working with jantan. We always assume...ye lah, kalau kita baik dgn orang, maka orang kena baik dgn kita. We think that this should be the rules of friendship where if we are good enough to share secrets, maka we can oversee any other practical things. Macam dgn laki, just because kita tido sekatil dgn nya, maka kita berpendapat bahawa, kalau kita demam secara automatik nya dia akan bawakkan sup ikan merah untuk kita. Where we will do exactly the same for him kalau dia pun dah nak mati. Ado? Nan hado. Sometimes we think we know people...but we actually don't. Just because you observed them day in day out, you know everything at the back of your hand.

Then another one, sokmo sakit hati dgn Boss nya. Dia ni bekerjalah bermati-matian untuk membuktikan dia tu pekerja cemerlang terbilang. Memanglah dia pekerja cemerlang terbilang but just because the Boss overlook some practical and vital things, dia kecik ati and marah2. Benda yang dia adu kat I semuanya, I think..had she directed it to the intended person, she would not got herself so wounded like that. I asked, did you tell her, jawab my friend ni, she should know whatt....

See...assumptions rules!

* Okay, ada ex schoolmate I yang semenjak dua menjak menjalin balik ikatan dgn I ni, berusaha bersungguh-sungguh untuk membawak I kejalan yang benar. Apa yang benar dan tak benar nya tak tau lah. One thing very obvious to her, is that I tak pakai tudung. And that I ni semayang pun...kalau balik kerja, I can qada' all prayers to Zuhur to Maghrib in one go. Now and again, she will send me all the link2 yang menunjukkan the azab I am about to get for tak pakai tudung. Dalam hati I cakap, kalaulah menghantar I link2 macam ni membuat dia happy, maka biarlah..dan semoga Allah bukalah hati I nak menutup aurat. But she just didn't stop at that...another text syarahan she sent me was, we have to pkasa ourselves to do things we don't like because at the end, akan timbul keredhaan. Like, kalau tak suka semayang, paksa diri tu semayang, paksa diri tu pakai tudung..paksa diri tu macam2..in the end, akan redha dan ikhlas.

Then of course those yang sungguh obsessed nak mengumpul pahala untuk dia selamat masuk syurga. Buat itu, buat ini. Some even take charge on some mission and enforce it on you. Some years ago, ada kawan I mintak I sedekah duit kat this mission to selamatkan orang Islam kat mana tah...and she said, by doing that I will build a jambatan emas for me in syurga. I told her, tak apa...I don't want that jambatan and I will not contribute.

I have never supported rumah anak yatim, bina masjid ke apa or sekolah pondok. Forgive me but I have less compassion for that cause. If the goverment boleh bina KLCC, Tower and tugu to remember all them people, I am sure they can build mesjid and suraus too. Katanya nak jadi negara Islam, kan? To me I have always maintain that those who deserve my help are the disabled, because my help would enabled them. This is my opinion.

The problem I encounter in Malaysia and orang melayu ialah, all the pesakit mental are syaitan-infected and dgn doa kepada Allah aja lah yang boleh menyembuhkan nya. My friend's relative was sent to some Islamic Centre for the mentally ill. Yes, this place exist apprently. So off the man went ito isolation, dibawak sembahyang and mengaji and all those pengisian rohani stuff. I went to see him. He is as paranoid as hell and in his own words, he was told that there are no such things as sakit mental dalam islam and he needed to do what he is asked to do. His illness was neglected and ignore and what was picked up was his weirdness. Macam haram. Who would think Ustaz will tell such vulnerable man that his tangan and lidah will be maimed? And was the Ustaz thinking to tell an ill man that Allah hated his guts? Where is this Ustaz compassion let alone kepala hotak nya? If you nak bukak pusat jagaan 'orang yang disesatkan setan' ni kan ke patut you research dulu apa 'setan' itu? Then of course you say that the beauty of your effort is everything about you and your treatment is Islamic. But the Ustaz forgot the most important bit in the process, the patient itself. Macam Dr lah, kalau heboh sangat nak suruh org masuk syurga but lupa nak bagi treatment kat orang tu for his illness. mana person-centred nya? But in Malaysia, religion sells. *

Let's just sums up all af the above. The asteric bits. I may not look or sound religious. I have always said that religion is the way of life hence, it is a choice. No paksaan. My first religious teacher said that and I believe him. (I believe everything my appa said)

I think you can impose 'force' and 'informed choice' up to certain age. I was forced to do everything at the very young age. I needed to be forced because I can't think for myself. I think had appa forced me to cover up like all the anak orang Arqam, I may be a different ppl today. 

I think it is good that kita menyeru orang berdakwah. Menyeru and memaksa is two different things. Yes, tidak ada paksaan dalam Islam. Al Baqarah explains that and of course its is counter statement by through ayat Al Qahfi. Ada banyak ayat dalam Quran tu, but situkang sampai akan sampaikan mengikut definition dia. A friend told me, although takde paksaan, it will hurt our chances to masuk jannah if we don't try to spread the good. 

Malaysia has come out with fatwas dan ada yang tak masuk akal pun ada. Okay, some said, siapalah kita untuk mempersoal kan ke terrer an orang yang belajar agama ni sedangkan kita pun hit and miss. But, bukan kah kita juga boleh berfikir?

So all those yang against majlis muda-mudi..konon nya dgn adanya majlis yang takde nilai islamic tu, maka terjejaslah aqidah. You tak fikir kah, orang yg terjejas aqidah tu, dah mmg dari azali tak kuat aqidah nya? So are we saying that Muslim in Malaysia aqidah tak kuat lah? So in order to menguatkan aqidah...apa yg perlu kita buat? Melancarkan kempen paksa memaksa, buat fatwa yang tak masuk akal, interfere in people's life or hounding people's facebook wall dgn macam2 nasihat and asking people to change they way of life?

Does it work?

Maka berilah peringatan, kerana sesungguhnya kamu hanyalah orang yang memberi peringatan. Kamu bukanlah orang yang berkuasa atas mereka. (Qur’an Surat Al-Ghaasyiyah ayat 21-22)

Let's just try practical things.....kind words helps. 

psst. pengisian rohani is good for stressed out people. The ill need proper help. Just like the fat people on the top and the buta celik above, the nasihat for them to do good will always dibalas dgn the thoughts of rasa nak lempang. You came to my wall asking me to wear tudung, to sembahyang (eh..adakah kau duduk serumah dgn ku?) and beribadat like I am the most obvious sinners, is annoying. I believe I still have akal. Yes, I have been given peringatan and terima kasih, and the rest, let me talk directly to Allah. (Yes before you ask, I did private messaged this friend of mine to tell her this, armed with all ayat I lifted from the Quran)

I am sure Allah will reward you...all those dakwah you buat. Teruskan lah but never, never think that orang yang you rasa hidup mereka kurang makna agama tu, kosong.