About Me

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Berbagi Suami, Boipren Dan DOT DOT DOT...

Boss I memang kejam....tak panas pun pungkok I kat my opis, sedap aje I disuruhnya pergi ke Dorset..about 2 to 2.5 hours drive dari tempat I ni.I memang dah agak dah..memang ada babi disebalik kuehtiau betul bila I telepon dia 2 hari lepas,telling her yang I dah masuk opis seperti sediakala. Boss kata..wahh..welkam back Makji...we missed you.We? Ceh..mestilah kata guna 'we' kan? Kang kalau cakap 'I' missed you, tak pasal-pasal kena whistleblow sexual harassment kan?

Sebagai pekerja yang menurut kata...I pun cakap okay lah.Kang nak melawan nanti dia ingat kita dah besar kepala pulak.Lagipun I ni terhutang body jugak pasal Boss that day approved cuti I yang short notice tu.Dah lah short notice, 5 straight weeks lak tu.

I got an urgent message from one young desperate hoswipe.Apparently kata secretary tak rasmi I...a.k.a. orang yang tukang ambik message kat DL I,masa I on holiday, ada 2,3 kali jugak dia mencari.Sebelum I pergi Dorset semalam, I pun telephone lah si adik ni. Adik ni is a high funsctioning autism.Very able bodied tapi kepalanya sungguhlah senget.Orang kata A, dia nak B jugak.She was in my case last year but after 30 weeks, I decided yang dah takde apa lagi nak difollow up however I ni kadang-kadang bermulut gatal pi cakap kat dia, kalau you ada problem..janganlah malu-malu contact opis I.

She wasn't a desperate hoswipe when I was seeing her, but she sure is one desperate case. Masa mula-mula I kenal dia, dia ni frust sebab takde orang nak kat dia.Hari-hari nangis...her low self-esteem made it worst.I remember how I wish not only her self-esteem is low.Macam-macam program my department buat untuk dia demi menghilangkan ke 'desperate' an dia ittew. Si adik ni pulak, demand nya boleh tahan...jantan-jantan available tapi bangsa terpeleot macam dia, tahu pulak dia tak berkenan.It was a murder for us.Imagine muka ghope dah lah macam Joyah..tapi ada hati nak kawan dengan Brad Pitt aje.Susah...susah.Nak berterus-terang dengan dia kang..janganlah jadi pungguk rindukan bulan...kang dia frust sampai bunuh diri..aku jugaklah yang susah.

Tapi Allah itu maha kaya...agaknya tuhan tahu betapa sakitnya jiwa I menasihatkan dia, alih-alih Cik Desperate Hoswipe (CDH) ni bertemulah dengan jejaka idaman kalbu nya.Jejaka idaman kalbu, taklah cun sangat, tapi boleh lah.So after a whirlwhid romance pegang-pegang tangan (and tah pegang apa-apa lagi) kat Day Centre tempat they all ni memadu asmara, they both decided to get serious, as in jumpa hari-hari, you datang rumah I, I datang rumah you..you kongkek I..I kongkek you that kind of arrangement. CDH semakin bahagia and kuranglah sikit challenging nature nya and for her accomplishment, I decided to closed her case last year.

When I spoke to her the other day, I reminded her that I'm no longer her caseworker and dia kenalah jumpa Duty Caseworker kat area dia.Tapi CDH kata dia nak cakap dengan I jugak sampai nangis-nangis dalam phone.Boss I kata, okaylah Makji, kalau you nak jumpa dia but make sure you report kat Duty Caseworker area tempat dia tinggal.

I told CDH yang I ada kat Dorset masa tu tapi I akan balik London for the weekend and dia bolehlah datang jumpa I kat opis besar.

See, from desperate woman to now desperate hoswipe.Masalah CDH sekarang is that she feel very distressed about her partner's sexual rejections.I wanted to transfer her case to a sexual therapist, but bila pikir balik, case dia ni bukannya case sexual tapi case emotional maka nak tak nak, kenalah aku dengar cerita nya.

Masalah CDH is way too common even to people who function normally.In your mind, it's perfectly alright for you to refuse sex whenever you're tired, stressed or have a headache.We often expect our partner to be understanding.Satu dua kali..okaylah.Tapi kalau dah 2 minggu ke berbulan-bulannya sakit kepala la..penat lah...haiyooh! Haruslah mati kegersangan kan?

I have a friend who told me yang dia punyalah dress to kill..(ni I tak paham...I thought, apalah susah-susah nak dress to kill...bukan ke bila you went into a kill, it is much better tak ber dress langsung?) tapi laki dia boleh buat tak heran.Puaslah member tu catwalk lah..dogwalk lah..tup tup Pakcik nya pergi tengok bola sambil mengangkang. Obviously after a while, my friend ni mulalah pikir yang bukan-bukan...she put two and two together - and came up with 17: His laki is having an affair, he's addicted to internet porn or he is no longer attracted to her.It is as if, she want his dick to stand to attention whenever she command and if it's doesn't, she catastrophise. Inilah case nya dengan si CDH ni....

Why is sexual rejection usually so much more devastating to women than for men? And when it happens, what can you do about it?

I think what it is, men are far more accustomed to rejection.They become used to it from their earliest teenage approaches,so it's no big deal for them jantan and they bounce back very quickly.Or, kalau you reject dia...dia dengan sukatinya akan cari lain. Perempuan ni aje yang have to get comfortable with a man that they begin to take the risk of being the initiators, finding that their forward gestures are gratefully received.But when his customary eagerness disappears, we woman begins to get a dose of our own medicine.

Unless if we are rule by our bottom head...sex can be affected by macam-macam hal.I am no expert however there's a type of people who have their head rule their body.

That's what I told CDH.I am only hoping that pakwe nya tu takde awek lain but is just having a bad day. I can't fix her problem but all I can do is to calm her down.

Men generally are more direct with their partners dalam hal ehwal macam ni.They can either tell you verbally that you are no longer mencapai kelulusan SIRIM in bed with him or he will tell you indirectly by berkawin lain dengan pompuan yang umur sama dengan Mak Kucing.We women, boleh kira dengan tangan lah siapa yang brutal boleh cakap direct kat laki...while the rest memendam rasa lah sampai ke tua..hoping that si laki nya tu mati cepat and kalau getah dibadan masih banyak, boleh lah kawin lain.

For consolation, remind yourself that his ocassional lack of interest is probably nothing to do with you.Don't pressure him or grill him about what's wrong.Instead, gently and supportively help him to de stress, relax and rest.If you suspect that he is withdrawing because he is passively angry with you, initiate a non blaming conversation to air your differences.Keep your petulant streak well under control.

Kalau dia memang dah ada pompuan lain with you discovered bukti-bukti yang kukuh...maintain your dignity (walaupun ayaq mata berchuchuran) dengan meng offer sijantan puaka tu..you kawin lah dengan pompuan itu.Anak,rumah and kereta bagi pada I dan tell him that you tak rela dimadukan.But it is up to you lah...kalau bermadu pun takpe jugak.Janji handbag berat.

Sekian nasihat puaka dari saya.

3 comments:

Manal said...

Ade gak possibility that its her man that has lost his interest to kongkek2 ni...Esp when he's not doing well in his work, his football team dah nak kena relegate awal2 lagi, his footie mates fell apart or went into their ways and mcm2 hal ehwal jantan yg dia malas nak discuss sbb selama ni, its all about his madam potpetpotpet pasal sale in Argus and so on la.

She shud get some lady friends too...bawak2 la diorg ke umah and chat over tea and shortbread ker ape ke kan...mesti laki dia heran tgk bini dia dah busy dgn kawan itu ini, and diorg siap nak kua pub bersama2 gitewww...(so typical eastender/corrie style). Mesti laki dia naik curious gak esp bila si bini asek nak plan home parties and stuff and he was only asked whether he wud be around that time or not. Lagi dodgy, bila bini join those church goers on sunday morning and come back with buncha books to read and stuff to do like gardening, etc. Her being too normal might give some senses into his head. Or ask her mother/sisters/sape2 in her family to come during weekends. That'll make her some typical social wife thats gonna bother her hubby.

Or let her get some tips from that sitcom : My Family

Get busy la that woman. Ni asek2 nak ajak in bed jer, sah la frustrated!

JoKontan said...

Alahai Mak Ji,

Lama tak singgah sini, dah ada 3-4 hapdets. Yahooo.

Kejaaaaaap ajer udah balek Landen.

Iron Butterfly said...

janji henbeg berat? Kak, you are evil ;p