About Me

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Tak Bersih...Sangat

Trust that when you bring up the subject of politics...in this case, siapa sokong PAS, siapa suka PKR..siapa menyampah dengan UMNO, maka ramai yang akan muncul dengan komen2 mega kurang hajar, pastu bantai taruk nama Anon. Baguslah sangat kannn?

But when you ask for their time to read and give to something yang adalah makna sikit, semua dok diam aje.

Okay la..since I write this blog and maybe owns it, let me just tell you beberapa perkara yang I tak berapa berkenan dan kalau boleh (memang boleh pun, pasal tu la gunanya privacy setting kan?) memang tak akannya terlepas untuk pembacaan awam.

a) Can I ask that you kalau nak buat comment, jangan gunakan kata-kata carut tahap dewa yang sohehnya takkan keluar kat Kamus Dewan Bahasa & Pustaka tu? Iya, I tahu..I pun mencarut gak..but to be very graphic yang melambangkan peribadi you yang ...eh, kalau dah bahasa ropa itu, apalah sangat yang boleh dibangga kan, kan? So, mintak tolong ye adik2..I tak mintak pun you suka apa you baca kat dalam blog ni. Kalau you tak suka, you gi baca blog lain. Perangai you yang mencarut to the high heaven tu serupalah macam, tak suka masuk Tesco, tapi masuk gak Tesco..pastu gi berak pulak kat situ. However, kalaulah you pesakit sindrom Tourette yang tegar dan dengan cara mencarut aje hidup you lebih bahagia..maka mencarutlah sebanyak2 nya. It is just I know that Tourette's sufferer, idoklah mencarut dalam bentuk tulisan gitu. Dah...syuhhh...syuhhh. Gi main jauh2.

b) What's written in here is an opinion of the writer. You did not subscribe to this blog. You don't have to pay to read this. Tidak ada unsur paksaan disini. Manusia ini lain kepala hotak nya. Benda yang I suka tak semestinya you suka, dan begitulah sebaliknya. Kalau you rasa saya terlebih liberal, terlebih open minded...dan terimalah itu saya. I have said this before, one must learn to accept their own weaknesses before they can accept others. Ketahuilah dalam perjalanan hidup kita ni, kita akan jumpa ramaiiiiiii peel orang. Kalau kita rasa orang tu sewel, terimalah kesewelan dia dan mengingatkan diri kita sendiri, harap2 nya janganlah saya begitu. Saya menerima teguran..dalam cara berdiri, baring dan duduk. Tegurlah dan bersedialah menerima teguran saya balik. Yang baik, yang perfect tu adalah Allah sahaja, bukan you dan bukan I.

c) Kalau you minat blog saya, dan berminatlah kepada blog saya saja. Berminatlah dengan apa yang saya kerjakan. Tak payah private message ajak jumpa. Dan tak payah private message bagitau saya yang you tak tidur malam berfantasy kan saya. Saya sudah tua untuk ter flattered dengan kata-kata you tu. Lagipun saya ni sombong dan memilih kawan. That statement in itself sudah cukup untuk membuatkan you all lari. Kalau you berkeras jugak nak menghantar mesej2 macam tu, apa kata you subscribe saja porn channel?

d) Okay..ni part yang sangat sensitive. Sebagai orang Islam, kita wajib mengingatkan sesama kita. Itu saya terima. Tapi jangan buat andaian kalau benda itu tak terjadi didepan mata sebab itu adalah fitnah. Having said that, fitnahlah saya semahu-mahu you sebab pahala saya pun kurang. You kata saya kuat minum..tak sembahyang..etc etc. You siapa? kawan serumah saya ke? Tak apa...saya bersyukur kerana you tak pernah tinggal sembahyang dan tak minum (agaknya). Terima kasih lah sebab buat pahala untuk saya ye?

e) Fahamkan betul2 apa yang you baca. Then buat ulasan then comment. Jangan baca satu line, lepas tu hati sudah hangat..maka membuat andaian tersasar. Inilah masalah orang Melayu, tidak faham. Bila tidak faham..tak mau bertanya untuk lebih faham. Kesudahnya buat andaian sendiri yang salah. Alaa..macam hal BERSIH tu lah. Tujuannya untuk meminta gomen memastikan yang pilihanraya akan datang ni dijalankan dlm keadaan adil. Baca manifest BERSIH tu. Dato' Ambiga bukannya presiden party BERSIH, dia dan beberapa yg lain hanya orang kuat yang memperjuangkan BERSIH. BERSIH is not Anwar too. BERSIH does not mean you are anti gomen.  Saya berani cakap begini sebab dulu saya pun macam itu. Bila tak faham, malu nak tanya sebab takut orang ingat kita bodoh. Tapi kalau kita bodoh, kan bagus kalau kita belajar? Bertanya malu...buat kacau tak malu pulak kan?

Sekian. Sekarang you, you dan you...boleh pergi. Pergi baca blog Anwar Ibrahim.

Friday, April 27, 2012

Tak Bersih 3.0

I have now return to London. Apasal lah makji...kata nak balik 3 bulan weihh. 

Boleh tak bagi alasan, I tak tahan nyamuk? Ish...apart from my relative menakut-nakutkan I supaya jangan naik bus katanya ramai orang indon yang keroje nya sokmo memandrem kan orang---hish buruknya sangka kann? , the one that I cannot stand is the nyamuk. Heeshhhh.

Okay, contrary to the legend and I so like to prove Kiah and yang lain-lain wrong, is that the rapid KL and Metro Bus juga dinaiki oleh penduduk tempatan. I was one of them. I took a bus from Kota Damansara to KL Sentral and from Bangsar to Kota Damansara. It take ages to get from one point to another and mengikut citarasa drebar la nak berhenti kat mana. Itu aje sore point nya.

I am not admitting defeat. Belum lagi. But my health have take turn for something slightly worrying that my GP summoned me back here. Bukan sebab putus chenta jua. Kita semua tahu...chenta itu macam coklat. Lupa taruk dalam fridge, dia cair. Taruk dalam fridge, dia beku..taruk sepah2, orang makan. So, makan boleh bertahan lama? I will talk about chenta but not in this posting.

So let's talk about something else..like Bersih 3.0 thing. Tak habis2 kan?  Macam mana nak habisnya kalau benda yang logic dimintak oleh puak2 Bersih tu tak nak dilayan oleh gomen. Of course for the disgruntled UMNO yang dah jadi DEfacto Presiden lain party tu, ni lah platform nya yang akan digunakan untuk menjadi batu api supaya orang sokong dia.

Tapi secara zahirnya, banyak benda tak bersih dalam gomen kita sekarang. Salah satu darinya ialah Kementerian Pembangunan Wanita yang menjadi payung kepada Jabatan Kebajikan Masyarakat. Saya diberitahu, orang sakit mental baru dapat status OKU last year. Dan kerajaan dengan eksyen nya bagi allowance RM150.00 sorang sebulan.

Saya tahu ramai yang akan kata sakit mental di sakit yang dicari sendiri. Ataupun, sakit yang dibuat2..takpun...rasukan syaitonnn gitu. 

Apapun definition kamu tentang sakit ini, sakit ini wujud. Ada orang inherit dari pakmak nya. Ada pulak yang terganggu gugat chemical dalam badan nya, ada pulak..yang tak boleh nak dinafikan..diganggu syaitonnn yang menyebabkan mental mereka rapuh. Cara perubatan dan baik pulih tidak ada yang specific. Kalau ada pun, nak cari orang yang sanggup membuat ibadat ni adalah amat susah sekali. Macam2 masalah nya kat Malaysia tu.

Kenapa Makji Esah berkempen sampai nak sakit belakang mintak you all support orang yang sakit mental...sebab sakit ini boleh berlaku kat sesiapa saja. Didalam pesbuk, ramai sungguh tanda-tanda nya. Orang yang menunjukkan tanda-tanda sakit ni mungkin tak sedar yang dirinya sakit. So, berapa ramaikah kengkawan you all yang dalam status pesbuk nya

a) Meghoyan yang bukan2
b) Membuat tayangan koleksi peribadi berupa barangan yang kononnya berharga orang lain takleh beli setiap masa..sampai kita pun bertanya, eh..ni aje ke kerja kau Temah?
c) Mengeluarkan ceramah kearah jalan akhirat dan selang seminit pastu, mengutuk bini Perdana Menteri?
d) Melancarkan perang sesama sendiri dalam pesbuk itu

Ohhh ramainya. Dah la orang sekarang kurang nak bersenam. Dah la kita ni sekarang senang betul nak naik marah. When we got angry, we don't want to let go. Menyimpan dendam etc etc. Err, bab menyimpan dendam ni..atas kebijaksaan masing2 lah ye. Nak kata tak bagus menyimpan dendan..adakalanya dendam disimpan untuk keperluan motivasi..yelah..kalau kita berdendam dengan seseorang atas sebab2 tertentu dan kita ni cuba sedaya upaya nak tunjukkan kat orang tu sebagaimana teruk nya orang tu menganiaya kita, kita takkan jatuh selepuk ketahap dia..gituh. Tapi janganlah berdendam set2 nak gi hantar santau, hantar kaki pukul ye, tuan/puan.

Makji ni naik turunlah ex opis Kak Jat tu....kemain cantekkk betul opisnya. Tapi mentality pegawai2 Kak Jat?

Sedihnyaaaa....maka siapakah yang nak membela nasib2 orang yang tak berupaya ni? Kita semua tahu Kak Jat lebih nak menjaga hal ehwal lembu nya. Nak tak nak..terpaksalah Makji dan kengkawan Makji di Help & Hope meminta anda2 yang baik hati untuk memanjangkan initiative ini dan memberi sumbangan seberapa mampu untuk menolong kengkawan kita yang mengalami kecelaruan mental tu.

Bagi sesiapa yang dok mintak Mebeng tuyu ke, tu mi ke etc etc, Help & Hope Special Project Funds takdak account dengan Mebeng To You & Me, maka dengan ini, silalah men transfer duit you alls yang berkepuk tu kepada account number dibawah...

 12300 1080416 690  Al-Rajhi Section 9 Shah Alam Branch. 

Account ini dikendalikan oleh MESSRS M Nordin & Co, so tidak ada (insya allah) akan timbul syak wasangka yang Makji Esah akan gunakan wang sumbangan anda kearah beli beg chanel ye. Manalah tahu kann...

Adalah uang-uang ini bakal digunakan untuk membiayai tempat perlindungan pesakit2 mental yang tidak menerima jagaan dari hospital dan juga pada para pesakit yang tidak mampu untuk dijaga oleh family masing2. Setakat ini, jumlah wang yang terkumpul, belum cukup untuk membayar sewa sebulan pun..iskk nya. But I would like to thank to those donors as far as Canada...

Mana yang sudah menderma, silalah pujuk kengkawan anda yang lain menderma jua. Siapa yang bapaknya kaya, mintaklah duit bapaknya barang seratus dua...siapa yang keroja nya membeli henbeg dan kasut tak habis2 tu, cutilah barang sebulan membeli barang dan salurkan duit anda yang banyak tu. Manalah tahu pengorbanan anda itu akan mendapat pulangan yang lebih banyak lagi...

Terima kasih....nanti saya mintak lagi.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Politi-Curse Part 2

Okah...this entry dah tak delah nak cakap pasal siapa2. Tu hari nak cakap pasal Pak Asang tu aje...yelah nak tahu, apasal Pak Asang dah stoop so low sekarang kann? Elok2 dulu jadi motivational speaker, now jadi penyidai kain kotor orang. Caitsss la sangat.

But I feel the need to write about...the penyokong2 berani mati baik hamnoh mahupun parti Bang Nuar. On the last entry, adalah anon penyokong Bang Nuar yang marah kat orang yang membuat pitnah kat Bang Nuar nya. Kesudahnya sampai jadi berbalas-balas pulak comments yang aku tak kuasa nak mempublish nya bcos he/she is getting personal.

Macam ni lah ye Anon Abang Nuar oii....since you asked, I think Abang Nuar deserved whats coming to him. Fitnah dia main jantatino, ada anak harems etc etc...hanya dia dan orang2 yang terlibat aje yang tahu kebenarannya. Abang Nuar pun dulu kaki tabur fitnah gak...fitnah yang macam mana, mungkin orang nak kategori fitnah ni dalam bentuk skandal seks aja. Lupa kah you fitnah yang dia buat kat Ghafar Baba masa dia nak portfolio orang tu dulu? So sekarang orang sudah fitnah you, rasakanlah macam mana sakitnya menanggung fitnah kan? Yang you dok sensitip dia main jantan, ke dia main jantan I ke, apa kes you? Ke you kecik ati dia tak difitnah dgn you pulak? So lantaklah dia. Secara logik nya, you rasa..patutkah kita semua kena susah hati Bang Nuar kena fitnah? Dia okayyyyy aje...pergi road show lagi. Lantak lah dia.

So let see and discuss why people entered politics. Mula2 aje..nak tarmac jalan..nak bagi tu..nak bagi ni. We know when Najib was the portfolio minister, he upgraded the standard of living for the army. Ni bapak saya cakap naa...bapak saya sokong opposition but he acknowledged la jugak kerja2 Najib tu. Chua Soi Lek, albeit his under blanket story, kawan saya yang doktor tu cakap, merasa lah mereka naik gaji sikit...setimpal dengan tanggungjawab mereka.

Anwar was the Education Minister when I was in MRSM. He threatened to shut down Teknik Cheras only after budak mati kena bully. What was he really good at, remind me? I only managed to remember his konon nya impressive way of presenting belanjawan...I came back from UK, he was the FM, and we were under recession. So, silalah maafkan saya kalau saya takdelah sangat nak menyokong Bang Nuar tu ye? Setakat masuk ABIM idoklah menjanjikan dia tu baik budi pekertinya. If you want orang alim in UMNO, appa saya kata Syed Hamid is orang alim.  That ex minister yang recently meninggal yang scholar Al Azhar tu orang alim. 

Have we really see anyone who is passionate about making changes? What we see and immediately take a quick fancy is to those yang pandai berkata-kata. Oh yes, Anwar can talk...I give you that. KJ also can talk. But talk aje lah pun. 

Every politician must have a policy, I think. I believe so. Bila nak bertanding, apa misi,visi and policy you...then convince the nation. Ni tak, asal berceramah aje fitnah. Asal fitnah aje, ceramah. Bila nak repair jalan nya? Bila mengurangkan masalah jenayah, anti social dan macam2 socio economic problem nya?

So, do we sokong amno because we think things will get better? Or must we depend on Anwar to topple amno and let him run the country? Ada ke calon PM yang lain? Will their coalition work? Ni pun dah nak gaduh sesama dia...

Yang nak memimpin ni pun...conscience tarak ka? So, adakah kita menyokong orang yang kita suka ataupun kita menyokong policy yang mereka perjuangkan?

Sakit hati kannn...cakap pasal ni. So to those yang passionate and rasa nak berlari amuk sebab Bang Nuar nya kena pitnah, saya galakkan awak janganlah baca blog saya ye...kan ke saya ni liberal?

Friday, April 20, 2012

The Politi-curse

I spent many weeks in Selangor and days in Kaybee. I didn't go to Kaybee this and the last trip but I sure get the news that I wanted to hear and the contraband I want to seludup balik UK. This trip I decided to tapau the buns I discovered in that bakery in Kota Damansara that wins the approval of MB1. I will tapau the kaya, the red beans and the kelapa ones. Chances are, halfway through the Alps, the buns will vanished. Dimakan tikus.

I read plenty about Dr Hasan Ali. Not that I want to but for some reason he is the centre of the news nowadays. On the way to MC's office, there's this banner bearing his face with his palms facing his face, ala ala berdoa gituh.

The Hasan Ali I first heard of was a motivator. He organised camps for the youngs and supposedly after they youngs tamat kem motivasi, the little satans will now be anak2 soleh solehah. My little cousin attended one of his camp. During that time, those who can afford camp or program like Dr Hasan's are of those who makpaknya banyak duit. Nowadays everyone can go to any motivational camp. There's learning how to solat camp, want to be orang alim camp etc, etc. In my time, I only went to OBS camp. Tu pun bukan apa you, my eldest brother sungguh berperangai that appa feels that the camp is good for him. His last resort before he kill him with his bare hands I supposed. My brother will not go if no one teman him, so I was the mangsa paksa. I was only 10. Please parents, unless your child tells you in advance they're into outdoor amazing race kind of activity, janganlah memandai nak hantar. Because of that I seriously think that I developed many phobias. My brother of course enjoyed it after few days, but that OBS experience did not deter his spirit to continue being a setan. Until now.

I think my aunt decision to send her daughter, my cousin, was because she is a single mother and she probably wanted her daughter to be taught by a pious male father figure cikgu and of all reasons, Dr Hasan Ali was perfect.

After that, years later...from my father's Harakah, I learnt about Dr Hasan Ali joining PAS. I wasn't a pro PAS then and now, not because of their mission of an Islamic state but my early experience of PAS is a cassette player playing syarahan of Hj Hadi and the now deceased former leader, in the mesjid crucifying Dr Mahathir and Amnoh. If I am not mistaken the deceased was Fadzil Nor. Entahlah...I was very young. At that young age, I know it is wrong to talk bad about another person especially in a mesjid. I told appa, they had just pray and doa, then they continue kutuk2 orang, teruk lah. My appa just laughed and since then calling me orang amnoh. Ishhh...but at that time, there is nothing not to like about Dr Mahathir.

Of course when Dr Hasan become the PAS, the normal thing to do is to speak ill of the amnoh. It is difficult to separate the thought of one excellent motivational speaker to kaki kutuk kaw kaw. But that is all normal about politics. You talk bad about your opposition and what best is you and your mission. But Anuar Berahim makin kaya....

Back in Malaysian politics scene again, here comes Dr Hasan Ali with his colourful news and speech. He is now sacked. From PAS. Good job he didn't create another party like Nuar Berahim...ahh don't speak so soon, entah entah malam ni he come out with one.

I think Dr Hasan looks better with his moustache on. Without it, he look weird. Seeing him on the banner near that proton showroom, does not make me want to vote for him let alone come to his ceramah. Plus, my idea of ceramah is always good stuff, bukan nak dengar so and so bagi bini dia kena kongkek dengan boss and now challenge that so and so to carry out the DNA.

Where have the power of the good gob gone, Dr Hasan? While they were together, tak pulak benda2 ni keluar kan?

So why do people enters into Politics then? All this ceramah talking about so and so hal dalam kelambu, does it really attract listeners? Isn't Melodi or Propaganza enough?

The job we do, sometime make the person we are. In the olden days, when you loves teaching so much, it shows in your nature...that you would love to dispense knowledge. Nowadays the cikgus? Do they really like what they do?

Dr Hasan Ali should stick to being a motivational self help facilitator. That suits him and his demure. Talking crap (although he will differ) and speaking of someone else private matter in public, really doesn't suit him. In fact, it makes him even or lower than the person he is slagging.

We have enough politician with the right face and attributes to talk about other people hal dalam kain. They are Nuar Berahim, Ibrahim Ali and Azwan Ali. Oops, is he a politician?

Pstt...I think I prefer Guan Eng. Too bad the picture didn't do him any justice. Oh..of course Nik Aziz. Who can wronged him, however silly statement he made?

Sekian, cakap2 politik untuk hari ni. Saja.

Sent from my iPad

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Degree In Being Interesting

Apakah makna topic nih? Entah...Kiah bbm'ed me. Update lah...I miss you. Ptuihh...I have updated twice. So, 2 nafkah batin in 2 days. Still tak cukup. Ohh this scandal of mine loves to read anything but things she needs to read.

So okay...what scandal want, scandal will get. But please do something about the safety belt okay?

A lot of interesting things happening in KL now. From the resignation of Kak Jat to the recent demonstration by students who is protesting the student loan. Apakah nama nya tu? PT something-something?

Dulu masa akak study, takdenya PT,PT ni...kalau pandai sikit dapatlah duit MARA or JPA. Petronas is still new that time. Kalau tak dapat, perahlah duit FAMA. Tu pun kalau FAMA ada duit. I took a part time job when I was at PPP. I know a lot of students take up part time work. They were poor, anak nelayan, anak pekebuns etc. I was a anak orang gomen. So sebanyak mana I menyampah dgn gomen sekarang, duit taxpayer lah membayar gaji makpak I dulu.

A lot of people form their own opinion about this. Yang sudah dibagi pinjam pun ada bagi komen jua. Majority is orang Melayu. Orang Melayu mudah dapat kemudahan...itu kata kengkawan cina india saya. Nak beli rumah pun dapat discount. Still, orang Melayu lah yang paling ramai sekali gigih nak participate dlm kerja protest memrotest ni. Hish..adik, banyak nya masa lapang? Zaman2 I puak2 yang kuat protest ni mostly adalah yu-em. Asal ada concert aje, bergasak budak yu-em buat demo. Nak tunjuk pandai lah tu kot...(ni kata2 senior saya kat ITM) ye lah...siapa yang tak suka tgk concert kan? Lagipun..apalah salahnya tengok concert? Its a private concert where people go voluntarily to buy the ticket. Bukannya kita kena paksa tengok. Budak yu-em time tu punyalah anti concert, sampaikan Sudirman nak buat concert pun kena bantah. Err, bukan ke Aruah tu student yu-em gak?

So, kalau dah dibagi pinjam...bayarlah. Ada pulak yang pertikaikan terms pembayaran sampai kata puak tu makan riba. Like, kalau pinjam seribu, nak bayar seribu gak. Ni akak nak cakap sikitlah ye...akak punya study background berkait dgn money management ni. The corporation diadakan untuk memberi kemudahan pinjaman untuk adik2 belajar. Bila kita tubuhkan badan peminjam, untuk badan tu beroperasi, kenalah ada overhead kan? So, bagilah pinjam 10 ribu. Process fee and admin, dalam 2 ribu. Untung tak ada langsung sebab tidak ada time limit. Kalau ada pun untung, ianya di accumulate untuk memoerkembangkan funds untuk bagi pinjam lebih ramai orang lagi. Cuba cakap kat akak, bab mana riba nya? Siapa yang kaut untung disini? Tak ada. Kalau nak pinjam seploh ribu dan bayar seploh ribu, silalah pinjam dengan bapak sendiri ye? Risk pinjam dgn makpak ni ialah kena reminder constant yang berbunyi 'ko hengat..kalau takdo lah duit den, tak kan dapek ko masuk unibositi do...' gitu.

Adat berhutang, bayar lah. Jangan dok suka menerima aje. Juga, kalau keluar dgn kawan2, sekali sekala bayarlah bil. Ni tak, dah le keluar banyak kali pandai order aje pastu time bayar buat tatau...pastu bab mengomplen kat tukang kedai tu kaw-kaw la sangat kan? Citsss...

Okay, now I must focus. I told Kiah today that after my meeting with puak2 bijak pandai.I feel the need to further my knowledge. Kiah kata...alaa, having degree/masters/PHD doesnt proof intelligence. This I agree, but my intention is to increase knowledge and for some other personal reasons. Then I told Kiah about my observation of those who think that being well equipped with so many educational papers shows their degree of intelligence.

I would love to write about this guy who has learning disabilities but, masters in fish pathology. He didnt even finished high school but he read about fish. He played mastermind game. I find him interesting.

This person I know (if you think this is you, then it is) often talk subtly about her level of intelligence that she thinks men find her a challenge to take up. Hence she is still single. She told us that her quest of a man must at least ada first degree. We laughed...not in her face though because this person clearly lives in oblivion. Bak kata Ani BNS, kalau dalam open discussion, sokmo ceritamu ceritaku that she must be the centre of this universe.

We women often assume to know what make ourselves appeal to the opposite site. We think men prefers beauty, sexy bods, brain etc etc. We tend to generalise too. Org Melayu camni...orang tak Melayu camni.

If you fancy yourself so much to the point of nauseating, no man will find you interesting. Having all degree in the world will not make you desirable either. So janganlah rasa jantan takut kat pompuan pandai. There is a chance they just malas to buang air liur. Takyahlah buat statement bunyi macam gampang kononnya dirimu itu sesungguhnya terlalu bagus sampai orang pun takut nak dekat. If you ask me, your level of sensitivity sucks.

I met a lot of interesting men and not all of them have a degree. Kita suka cakap jantan melayu tak sensitive. Hish, tak sensitive apanya kalau benda kecik2 pun boleh jadi bahan gaduh laki bini kann? Tu tak masuk yang asal gaduh aje, lari dari rumah. Jantan bangsa lain pun sama jugak...so I think we should really rule out a race case here because mana2 jantan yang tak mature suka lari dari problem.

Most single women are single because they choose to be single. They can say that they are not the memilih type but if you set your own standard, aren't you the one who limit your choice? Men prefers interesting women. Of course they need to like what they see but after a while, superficial things worn out and at that later stage of relationship, being able to interest one another is essential.

If you think you need to tone down your 'intelligence' try being normal. What is normal? Normal is when everything does not revolves around what you think. Other person life stories are interesting too...not only yours. Normal person is not desperate to be heard. In your quest to become interesting, pick up some normal sense of humour. Don't overdo things. People will like you more if you are plain boring.

Kan, Kiah? Maka saya rela untuk dikutuk bertubi2. Like I told you Kiah, the statement about my adik ipar tak jadi tu menyentap jiwa raga. But this is all my own opinion.

Percayalah, only Kiah finds me interesting. Tu pun sudah cukup.

Sent from my iPad

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Saya Pun Pandai Buat Rojak Jugak...Bukan Kiah aje....

Pemandu di Malaya ni sangat obsess dengan honk. Tak tau la pesal. Kalau orang nak keluar dari tempat parking kena honk, macam lah perbuatannya itu satu dosa kan?

Orang nak adjust gear and bergerak slow bila lampu hijau menyala pun kena honk. Wahhh...does few seconds make any difference?

I now think that as a driver, I am not allowed to make any pittance mistake but unfortunately, this can't be helped as I am new to the road here.

I have twice witnessed accidents with one involving seeing a black bag on the road. Why on earth do the JPJ allow the cyclist on the motorway? HGVs are all equipped with numbers to call if you think they're being driven dangerously but seriously, katalah if I call them now and quote so and so plat number of lorry bawak macam haram jadah, what will be next? My call will likely be answered by tekan butang satu untuk bahasa jawa etc etc...

In the recent years, I now believe that Malaysian drivers loves spending money in the kedai ketuk, hospital bills and funeral expenses. The ultimate achievement would be the kereta succumb to total loss and the driver have their nyawa spared. Its okay to wait months but lepas tu dapat kereta baru. Because of that, life after total loss crash, the driver automatically have rights to brag about near death experience nya. Macam pundek!

In KL now it seems like semua orang ada kereta. My rented car was once blocked by this Myvi that belongs to one orang gaji assigned to fetch one little amoi. Waaaa....orang gaji also got car meh? I asked my friend who has to send and fetch her kids daily to school, kenapa budak tu tak naik bas? Ohhh, dia tak suka. Wahhh....since when kids got to rule the household management? One say..bahaya...nanti budak kena colek. Laaa, have we heard a stand off of school bus taken hostage by some perampok? The bus pick up depan sekolah and hantar depan rumah, just ask the drebar to make sure budak tu masuk rumah and then set off. Kurang la risk nak kena colek kan?

Ohh ye lah..nowadays Malaysia ramai yang dah kaya gila-gila. Pusat mempromosikan kekayaan makpak dan anak2 itu pun dah melambak dalam pesbuk. Its a trend now, your amma bought you a beg sekolah jenama elbi, and the anak must acknowledge it in pesbuk...dgn ucapan, tengkiu mummy for the elbi bag..you are the best mum in the world. That got you thinking, ehhh...must do that kah? Kalau anak melawan cakap makpak, masuk tak pesbuk? Ye lah, anak nak pi concert jastinbibah and mak tak kasi lantas keluarlah statement, I hate you mummy...how uncool is this?

The only choice my appa allow me to make when I was in primary school was to decide if I want to travel on the same transport as my big bro, that was because he knows my brother would bully me into carrying his bag so that he can play with his friends while aku menjadi penunggu bag nya. Apart from that, everything is being decided for me. Once in a blue moon Appa will send me to school in his car, but that was hardly.

My niece and nephews nowadays can tell their parents what they want to eat, where they want to go for holiday and what sort of bajus parents should buy for them. I would have thought with our upbringing, my sister should have known better not to allow kids to overrule parents. Ishh...good jobs I takde anak and my niece and nephews don't have me as their mother. Mampos budak2 tu ku rotan!

Go back to overpupulations of cars....because I live outside Malaysia full time, I like to think that the road ruling in UK are far far far better than Malaya. Making rules and enforcing it is one thing, policing it is another. There is no such thing as kepimpinan melalui teladan in here. The PM want us to do this and this and this...tapi dia nya?

So if the curent government macam tah hapa2' should we switch allegiance to the pembangkang? I told My friend, let's just all vote for PAS and DAP. Not the Nuar Berahim. I still wonder why and what is so appealing for his pengikut to ikut him. He was a disgruntled UMMO member. He preaches about against nepotism and cronism, and everything bad about UMNO. I have nothing against his sexual preference or how many kids he fathered or how many time he sondols, but what do you actually want to achieve lah Bang Nuar? Bang Nuar is already rich...kena pecat from gomen and masuk jel banyak tahun pun, he can still erect his new large bungalow atas bukit tu. Nik Aziz apa ke boleh duduk dalam surau...orang nak tuduh songlap duit pun segan wehhh.

Then this mamak yang dok berapi api mintak balik tanah mesjid org melayu yang konon nya da kena juai. Wehhhh....mesjid yang ada pun tak penuh kannm? So what if the tanah mesjid was sold, dapat tanah lain kan? Kalau nak sembahyang, mana2 pun bley sembahyang. Dah dah lah menjerit pasal tanah.

Is there a proposition for the ministers to start living like their voters? Ye lah...after all, ministers are government servants. Being a minister is a hard work in the office itself kan, so yang nak oi part time kerja bela lembu kambing buat apa?

Okaylah....akhir kata, adik yang bawak keta proton savvy kat Giant Shah Alam tadi yang rasa macam bawak Ferrari, boleh tak sedar diri tu sikit...awak tu dah la kecik, tin milo kalau kena himpit dengan keta Alphard tu boleh leper tau. Harapkan enjin je macam bunyi kapalterbang MAS, takdelah laju pun...nampak bodoh nak mampus lagi ada dalam car park pun nak racing.

Sekian.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Berita Terkini....Disana Disini....

Asal mencarut aje, musti ada puak2 yang kata I lah Tok Ustazah nya. Tak baik tau...makpak I takpernah ajar I mencarut. I belajar mencarut dari blog Azwana....(iskkk...)

Okay, my last entry was written in such emotional state. Minta maaf. I shouldn't have done that. Macam paksa orang sedekah their hard earned cash pulak. Nak menderma kan misti ikhlas? Buat apa2 pun mesti ikhlas. Menulis dan menghapadate blog pun musti ikhlas....errr, ikhlas nak berkata-kata. Ikhlas untuk mengingatkan orang yang membaca (juga yang menulis) yang kesilapan, salah perkiraan dan keterlanjuran perbuatan dan kata-kata boleh dan mudah berlaku dan sedar akan consequences nya.

Still, if you have cash to spare yang bukan dalam budget you nak beli elbi,gusik etc, bersedekahlah. Kepada yang meminta mebengtoyu method of payment, I am not sure about mebeng, but soon I will publish the local account number makan, sila lah beri tanpa malu-malu ye?

To those who offered to hand over the donation to me, well, I ni pemalu...makan pun banyak..usahlah offer to take the tab as for your tab will never dry. But boleh juga...tapi saya bawak bodyguard, bleh? Private msg me lah...I can pass on your donation to the Bendahari and I can enjoy the free food you offered to pay...muka taka malu sungguh!

Polis & Saya
Hampir sepurnama yang lalu, saya telah ditahan pak pulisi yang tidak ganteng malah ketiak berbau (ohh, tak pernah ke kau mendengar rekaan masakini bernama deodorant, cik abang oii?) What seems to be my biggest offence was...berhenti ditempat yang tak sepatutnya. Iya...I stopped in the middle of a motorway heading to NKVE. Pandai kan I? After a month, I am now familar with SKVE,Kerinchi Link, Sprint,Duke,MEX etc. Two Pak Pulisi apprehended me straight away. If I am Karpal Singh anak didik, I will also question them...so, I am not allowed to berhenti tengah jalan tapi Datuk berdua? There have to be one rule for all, kalau aku takleh, kau pun takleh lah kan? But twisties tongue I am not and I know Pak Pulisi is not Mak Pulisi. Pak got ego as high as KLCC skybridge. Lagi rendah rank, lagi you takleh melawan. Plus, I was alone at 11 close to midnite, plus...if I got arrested kerana melawan Pak Pulisi, I no longer have the 'immunity'. Please don't get me wrong, by immunity I mean...dulu masa aruah appa ada, I get away with lot's of thing as Appa seems to have good friends and relatives all over Jabatan Kerajaan. Also, I have left hotel industry many years now, so the power that be yang selalu dapat makan tido free kat hotel chain majikan saya, agaknya dah lama pencen dan bertaubat dari mengambik ras**h.

The Pak Pulisi traveled in a small Kancil labelled Bandar Sunway. I think they are not the criminal chaser one, ye lah..bila nak cekup penjahat nya dgn kancil tu? The two stopped just ahead of me, came out of their sedih patrol car..and I voluntarily wind down my window.

Kenapa berhenti ni?! Tahu tak kat jalan ni tak boleh berhenti?!

Sebab ada motor depan saya.

Cik tak boleh berhenti atas high way ni, kalau nak berhenti..kena pergi lorong kecemasan...

Saya tahu..tapi Tuan nampak kan tadi, ada group budak2 motor. Seorang sudah corner betul depan kereta saya, kalau saya tak berhenti...nanti accident.

Cik ni tak paham, highway kereta tak boleh berhenti suka suka.

(panass betul hati I) Tuan..saya faham apa tuan cakap..tapi Tuan dengarlah apa saya baru cakap, ada motor belok depan saya, kalau saya tak berhenti..nanti dia mati pulak. Saya ni nak bagi tahu tuan kenapa sebab saya berhenti (Kiah, i spoke in bahasa baku, okay?)

Ni dah malam, apa buat atas jalan malam2 ni? Ada lesen tak ni? Ni kereta pinjam ke kereta sendiri?

(adakah soklan atuk tu relevan?) Saya baru habis kerja. Ni nak pulang lah...

Kerja apa malam2 tak habis ni? Perempuan tak elok kerja sampai malam...ada lesen tak?

I handed over my drivers licence. I was crossed. He refused to listened. I looked at his tag and looked at another guy. Equally tak hensem. They both looked at my licence and bisik2 and look about.

Ohhh it's okay. You can go now madam...no problem.

What?

You can go...good night okeh...

They both ushered my ride away and wave, tetiba dgn muka friendly nya.

Why lah? I told my friend the next day of that incident. She said....oiii...polis takut kot tengok kau punya UK driving licence.

The Bini No.3
I got introduced to this young lady....and her husband. The husband is obviously older than her and although he is older, he is not the tua patut dok rumah ajelah type. He is still steady. After a while, The lady told me that she is his 3rd wife. No, she is not the perampok laki orang type. I genuinely think he is her jodoh. She looks happy and he, of course la...jantan banyak bini, ada ke yang rupa stress nya?

From her, I got to know another man 2nd wife. Hmmm..it is like a club of 2nd and 3rd wives club la pulak. But this wife ada crisis dgn madu tua nya.she told us, he madu sent her some hantu that is currently terrorising the flat. So the 3rd wife asked me if I fancy teman her to this 2nd wife flat and watch the ustaz performing the exorcism rituals. I tanya, why susah2 nak panggil ustaz segala, suruh lah bini no dua tu ngadu kat lakinya kerja bini tua nya ni...untung2 laki naik angin and terus bagi notis 24jam kat bini tua nya. Maka boleh lah no.2 naik takhta kannn? My fren the 3rd wife said, ehhh...hubs dia tak caya and in return, laki dia tuduh bini no.2 yang hantar hantu kat madu nya.

Laaaa.....

I refused the offer to pergi nengok upacara halau hantu tu, taka pasal2 hantu tu dah homeless then ikut I balik rumah MC pulak. I told MC,and seperti biasa dia idoklah berminat hal2 duniawi yang berunsurkan gossip dan cakap kat I, you janganlah nak cari penyakit ye...

That...the whole thing about berbagi suami thingy got me thinking....perlukah kita nak menyusahkan diri menjadi bini no 2,3 and 4 jantan kalau hidup kita akan sentiasa kena berjaga2 apa the madu plotting nak buat kat kita? We thought that this is year 2000 plus plus...okaylah, jantan nowadays kalau dah nak menyundal sangat, bagi ajelah dia kahwin lain, asalkan jgn menyusahkan kita, kan? But I think hidup berpoligami ni, not only that his other wives is our potential risks, our husband is also one..kalau dgn bini pertama dia boleh menyundal lain and kawin dgn you, you think after awhile, dia tak nak ke menambah cawangan?

Macam2 tau...nasib orang sana sini.

Nak jadi pompuan simpanan aje, setakat dapat duit aje lah kann? Hak tak ada. Now, everything is about security. But it is obvious, orang pompuan suka menyusahkan diri. Jodoh is one thing la, but setakat nak berlaki and pastu sokmo kena dengki dgn madu, buat apa nya?

Extra Marital Affair
Hmm...if you think this is about you, you're wrong. I friend told me recently dia tgh ada affair dibelakang lakinya. Erkkk. I asked, affair ada tido-tido ke or setakat, you and him syiok2 dibawak ke tidor malam fantasising abt each other in their own husband/wife embrace? Ohh no. My fren cakap laki ni bujang lagi. (seriously, bukan you)

Yes, they are sleeping together and its current. Husband my fren of course la tak tahu. Sibuk sangat ke kerja sampai tak tahu? I know the husband. Masa diorang kawin I pergi. My fren ni from sekolah adalah bohsia...err our definition of ramai boifren. She claimed, husband is cold. Centa dah lama kering...ish, tu jelah alasan kan...tak cukup kasih sayang etc. orang tu berkerja la siang malam nak mencukupkan kasih sayang dalam bentuk material.

I asked her, if he is cold and you cant stand it, blah la. This new chap of yours supposedly bagus lah kann ? My fren said with the scandal, she feel deeply love. Dengan laki you? Ohh, the sparks dah hilang. Husband tahu tak kau tak centa? He should know...tapi dia buat2 tak tahu kot.

After that I malas nak layan si kawan I ni. See, I am all for centa sejati. When centa is fading, the two should talk. Surely, tak banyak sikit ada centa. We can love the smallest thing about our partner, despite perangai nya yg serupa syaitan. But to punish the partner for the lacking in the marriage by having another sexual encounter, is for what? Will it bring the spark?

My fren noticed that after knowing her sexcapade that I shied away...she asked if I think she is a bad person. I said, no. You obviously have calculated this risk. You dah ada anak. You both got joint mortgage,loan etc for the life you built together with your husband.

But you are not in my situation...no one will ever understand...

What do I need to understand? This is very straightforward. You cant have both. Kalau you centra dgn scandal, end your marriage la. Kahwin la dgn scandal.

Too much is at risk...

You can get caught....

I am being careful...

So that makes it okay lah...so, janganlah dok cerita kat orang laki you dah cold etc etc...you yang nak ada affair belakang dia, leave your husband out of it lah. Tu yang I tak suka dengar. I am not taking sides ye...kalau kita jahat, kita yg rela nak buat jahat, dont lah use others as an excuse kejahatan kita. How you conduct your life is non of my business, but gloating about it...you think that makes you cool?

Kesimpulan nya, PDA in facebook...kalau dah terlebih2 tahap muntah kayap tu, musti ada babi disebalik keuhtiau kannn?

Sekian.