About Me

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Kelab Jiwa Luka

Macam-macam perkara berlaku recently ni....

1.Can You Forgive And Forget?
Kadang-kadang boleh forgive tapi takleh forget.Ada pulak yang dah forget tapi takleh forgive...(ada ke macam ni?) Ye mmg ada...especially dalam kes hutang-hutang lapuk ni.I'm quite generous with my money...ni bukan kes generous yang asyik nak menderma aje tu.I am blessed with cepat kesian heart...plus I tak pandai menipu terang-terangan.If orang nak pinjam duit, I tak reti cakap I takde duit...duit takdelah banyak..tapi ada lah.I am not cut become 'Ah Long' either...selalunya bila I dah memberi tu, harapan dalam hati..macam mana ikhlas nya I memberi..macam tulah kena bertanggungjawabnya you bayar balik.I tak reti nak tuntut-tuntut, ugut potong tangan or sending over heavies.And sipenghutang selalunya...bila sipembagi hutang nya bangsa yang macam I ni..(menuntut gaya telepathy) mulalah akan diserang amnesia and worst bit, dissapear from the face of the earth.I saw a familar face recently and tup-tup, I teringat yang sipolan ni ada berhutang dengan I...dek kerna lapuknya hutang tu, I pun dah lupa and dengan muka-muka sipenghutang tu pun I dah ingat-ingat lupa.Tapi..hati tetap panas dan tak dapat nak memaafkan...so, itulah example nya forget but can't forgive.Sewel kan aku ni? One of this blog reader mengemukakan soklan..camana nak melupa dan memaafkan..I nak aje cakap, apasal la you tanya I soklan ni.Bukannya apa, I takdelah pandai nak bagi jawapan..pasalnya I ni pun set-set pendendam juga...kalau hati panas mau ku bakar rumah orang yang menyakitkan hati ku.But I ni, cakap aje besar...habis-habis pun takdelah nak commit arson attack...penant mengumpat sampai mulut keluar super busa aje lah. I think, best advice would be...to let go of past hurts and mend the broken relationship...tak kiranya lah relationship dengan orang ataupun dengan diri sendiri.Try not to get hung up on why.You can forgive someone without understanding why they hurt you.Demanding explanation can be pointless as they may not know the reason themselves.Maybe what you can say is that 'I don't know why you did that but I can accept that it happened and try to move on'. However, I can't be sure if this applies to kecurangan laki/bini/bf/gf. I for one cannot just move on from kena tipu just like that...or can you? It is not as simple as you kena tampar dengan pakwe/makwe masa tengah-tengah angin...you can passed that as the moment of temporary insanity, don't know what get into me stuff like that.Kalau kalau dah pandai and dalam keadaan sedar committing adultery or aksi-aksi lucah, what else can you blame it on apart from nafsu buaya mu ittew? Another thing you can do is to let go of the blame. Forgiveness is a contract between 2 people, sorang janji taknak buat lagi and sorang lagi janji tak nak ungkit.However, there will always be trigger points that remind you of that pain.Establish a way to discuss how you feel at those moments, without bringing up what happened.If you're upset, you may suspect someone of faking an apology...or kalau yang dah tertangkap tu, terus bersumpah demi Allah bagai...you know lah some people will just saying the words to get things back on track.We have to have clear mind..kalau nak maafkan, maafkan saja...takyah gi pikir sipolan ni sajaaa je cakap nak bagi I sejuk hati.Kalau dia menipu, what can you do? Try to accept their apology without suspicion, think of the crucial platform for further communication.Once they know you accept their regret in genuine, you can start to rebuild the relationship.The hard part of forgiving is feeling vulnerable to future betrayal,as there's no guarantee they won't hurt you again.Restoring trust is tough but vulnerability is the key to intimacy.Try to see it as a necessity towards mending the relationship.Kalau dok what if, what if aje, susahlah you nak get close again.

2. I got very angry 2days ago...the pressure of work dicampur pulak dengan perangai-perangai Boss-Boss besar yang macam puaka.As a foreigner...(or is it just me) kadang-kadang terasa jugak diri ni dipergunakan...mentang2 lah I ni tak pandai nak menjawab cakap Boss...tak kisah attitude...all Malaysia boleh thingy.So pada satu malam yang hening...selepas hati luka membaca email-email Boss yang akin to email majikan kepada hamba abdi...I sent out my resignation notice.Hari ni tadi...my assistant telephoned me, katanya CPB telepon dia cuba nak korek-korek apa halnya sampai I nak resign ni.Dalam hati I...ohh..dengan I tak nak tanya...my assistant cakap CPB is worried about me (hah..baru kau rasa..) and my other colleague dah dari semalam memujuk. Tapi apakan daya...hatiku dah terluka.I am so dissapointed with the way I was treated.Sampai hati sesiapa yang kasar dengan I tu....

3. I keep thinking about my dead ex lately ni.....tak tahulah kenapa.Like I said earlier...forgive and forget, ikut orang jugak.I think I am grieving...tapi apa ke hal nya? Bukannya baru kena tinggal semalam.Dah berzaman....

9 comments:

l!zs @)--- said...

ala sedihnya baca entri ni sambil dgr lagu rossa.sabar ya han..

Anonymous said...

Makji kalau sebut pasal ex-ex nih misti tgn gatal nak komen momen ni....*sigh*...

Monkeys are hardest to forget...and forgive...

*double sigh*

-noraini bukan nama sebenar-

Anonymous said...

Esah, I just wish at this time Dentist and I can bawa you keluar makan rojak and minum cendol just to cheer you up. Aiyo, Im so not good with words.

Takpe, aku tau ko always persevere.

Hugs.
Miss AA

Manal said...

In another twisting plot (diikuti dgn bunyi drum eastender masa ending), they dont see what the problem is like we and most ppl see them. They do not see it the same way as most ppl do and then mula la bersedih hati , murung, and ala2 satu dunia benci diri ini....and plak ade alasan ala2 lawyer malik imtiaz sarwar (karpal singh suda tua, not so the it loyar anymore except for those tua ppl like him like tun-tun and such) that all those problems happened because of somebody else/under pressure/parents upbringing/blaming saper2 la termasuk la kerajaan.

What can we do?

And those penghutang2 sana, pls la bayar IOUs to makji...Sbb makji ni mmg tak mengira. Ko masuk neraka nanti tak pepasal sbb tak langsaikan hutang orang!

Anonymous said...

i bersimpati... kalau u asyik teringatkan Mr Dead 2... mayb he's asking for something from you: your kemaafan dan doa...and betul2 ker dah buat keputusan muktamad nie nak bercerai ngan CBP? you merajuk jer tu....and biasanya merajuk pada yang sayang..dan pada some1 yg amek berat...

captlukman said...

ermmmm bab kekasih lama ni, ana tataw nak komeng camana, sometimes cuma bersandarkan memori je lah yg membuatkan kita tersenyum kan???

Anonymous said...

tokonang kan cinto lamo tu biaso lah tu makji ooii..tapi jangan sedih2 sangat, kalau rasa sedih sedekahkan je al fatihah utk dia..pasal resign dari keje tu, inshaAllah i doakan makji dapat keje lain yg lebih baik ok :)

yatie

OOD said...

1) owh, kok ado masalah problem , buleh ngadu kek kau ko?

2) tompek den ado kojo kosong. kalau kau nak, den buek surat sokongan. Kok dapek surat letterhead tulih jawi kaler merah, lagi afdal

3) kau sabarlah.. hikmah banyak, tak nampak yo gak eh..

Hjh Esah Jolie said...

Lizs, Noraini Bukan Nama Sebenar & Miss AA, Terima kasih...if only masa-masa kemarau hati ni, aku boleh melantak rojak mamak kat Pelita tu...

Manal...apa kata aku factor kan hutang2 tu...biar org lain yg jadik Ah Long nya...ngam tak?

Anon, Lukman & Yatie...ayoyo kadawale....

Ood, ado kojo kosong? Kojo hapo? Boghi ceghamah ko?