Is This Really Chenta?

You often heard...

That after many,many yonks of marriage...the wife/husband will confessed that they have stopped loving their better half years ago. Some would say, I stayed on because of the kids. Ye lah...sometime, kalau bukan kita yang setan jelmaan, partner kita pulak. You dislikes your husband....his attitudes even his attributes, but he is this loving doting father yang kalau kita jadi anak dia pun kita bahagia. Tapi nasib malang, rezeki kita jadi bininya. I know someone yang kalaulah tak pasal anak2 nya, semalam lagi dia dah lari tinggalkan lakinya. But kita ni manusia yang tak banyak sikit ada jugaklah perasaan belas dan kasihan, cuba gak cari space dalam hati kita supaya sayang kat laki kita tu dan menghargai kelebihan-kelebihan nya yang seciput ittew.

But is it fair to say after we decided to stay on, that kita sebenarnya taklah chenta sangat kat Mamat tu? Chenta kan comes in a different shape and form. Kalau tak chenta sejati, chenta yang tolerable pun boleh kannn? Chenta lah tu..walaupun tak banyak.

As someone who firmly believe in retribution, I think..kalaulah kita tak suka sangat dengan laki or bini kita tu...cakap ajelah terus terang. I remember the days I was preaching about the importance of being a good husband and man to JT, to let go of his materialistic ego and to come clean about his feelings. I am happy that he is now a happy man and he is a lot happier with his ex wife are now are on good terms. He called me to wish me hari raya and sempatlah bagitau ex bini nya nak kahwin lain. Lagi dia happy katanya..sebab dia tidaklah rasa guilty sangat sebab menceraikan bininya.

I asked JT have he ever cheated on his wife? JT cakap he was tempted but he admitted that the stress he put on for not loving her anymore occupied his thoughts. Come to think of what he said, I know some would excuse commiting extra marital (kalau tak kahwin lagi boleh ke dipanggil extra marital affair, Kiah?) affair sebab rasa chenta dah takde. Terpikirkah kita, maybe we are the only one who is out of love but not the partner?

So I cakap kat JT, ohh kalau tak stress, you pi ada affair lah dengan pompuan lain ye? He said..tak jugak. Wife is a nice woman walaupun tak menepati criteria nya. He said that divorce would be a lot easier if there was another woman tapi masa tu takde katanya.

Having been cheated before (by 2 people yang ku chenta-chenta pulak tu) I find all extra marital affair very disturbing, especially bila yang kena naya tu set-set yang baik-baik. One thing that I profusely questioned MC masa kita nak rekindle dulu is that..apasal la you tipu I? Tanya banyak kali ni sampai orang tu fed up...last last I kata dengan kita, lepas ni takyah susah2 tipu lagi tau..cakap aje kalau you rasa nak pi kat orang lain. (dan dia jawab..nanti kalau ada, I bagitau ye? Ohh...I was expecting dia pun buat drama pariah jugak)

Nowadays, you will be lucky if your mangsa penipuan cakap kat you, semoga Allah aje lah yang akan membalas perbuatan you. I am not at all suggesting balasan Allah tidak setimpal but knowing betapa terpeleotnya kepala hotak orang masa ni, god know what anger can do a person.

Tak payahlah kita nak tegakkan benang basah...err, you ada affair dengan laki orang yang dulu laki you, and you excuse your doing because orang tu pun buat camtu kat you. Well, no disrespect lah but in the end, where do you stand? POMMM..matilah orang marah pasni. Something bad had happened in your marriage and the good is to learn. Tapi kalau kita pun nak rendahkan diri kita sama macam orang yang kita kutuk2 tu, yang sakit hati nya kita jugak, kann?

Tapi kan..kalau partner kita set-set bapak/mak ayam, silalah sakitkan hati nya dengan mengadakan affair luar rumah ye? -----nasihat songsang penulis.