Abang Ajuwan

Okay...do me a favour ya. If umur I tak panjang..bagi yang mengenali diriku, silalah khbar kan pada Ajuwan Ali yang I mintak mahap la pasai suka tulis pasai dia dalam blog I ni....hik hik hik.

 

Cannot help it lah uols. I rasa, sama jugaklah macam follower dia, the reasons we still follow is to see level kerosakan otak nya.

 

But do you really think dia tu manusia berotak rosak?

 

Ajuwan Ali sungguh pandai mencari perhatian. Dalam IG nya ada ja benda provocative dia buat kat orang. Dia dok kata orang sebok hal dia..tapi part dia pi kutuk orang walaupun secara tak terbuka tu apahal kan?

 

Dia kata dia tak heran masuk TV sebab tanpa TV pun, dia masih kaya raya. Katanya. Then you want to ask him, bang, kalau abang tak heran awat abang dok kata pasal benda tu ja...dah tammo kluaq TV biaq pi la melingkup, kan? Tak. Ni hari hari cakap tak heran.

 

Kalau tak heran...awat nya yang dok cakap pasal tak heran, tak heran tak habih-habis?

 

Pastu si Ajuwan ni suka benau mempromote kehalus mulusan wajah nya yang berseri-seri dek air wushu..ehh wudhu gittew. But kalo ko sambil mekap pakai pondeseng pastu pi announce muka ko jernih bak Puteri Frozen, bukan kah keshantikan tu milik bedak bertepek yang ko baru sapu tu?

 

Then ko posing depan Kaabah la...pakai ihram etc. Pastu sumpah seranah haters neraka jahanammmm. Ya haaaa...nak ja Tanya, bang, boleh ka menyumpah depan Kaabah..or boleh ke menyumpah dalam unipom suci tu?

 

Of course nobody can get through to him. Sebab the moment ko tegur, ko akan kena block. Bila dah kena block, ko akan di maki hamun kaw-kaw dan si Ajuwan ni bley lak cakap..eii apasal ko tak jawab? Eii apasal ko diam?

 

Hek elehh bang..dah ko block orang tu, manakan dapat dia menjawab lagi kan?

 

Kerjaya abang Ajuwana kita sekarang ialah memasak rendang. Yang best in the world katanya. Kalau uols order, dapat lah kluar muka dalam IG nya and dapat lah label melayu sorgaaa. Hik hik.

 

You crossed his path, habislah dia akan seru seluruh followers nya pi maki u. U maki haters dia, u dapat rending free. Yeah..berkat sungguh rezeki kita dan rending yang nak masuk dalam dan jadi darah daging tu.

 

Belum pun habis penyepit dia hilang dicopet oleh tah sesapa, dahh dia telah amukan dalam IG dengan BFF dia. Kisah nya dia marah la orang famous tu tak sound peminat dia bila peminat dia tu pi lahar Ajuwan Ali ni.

 

Hek elehhhhhhh. Ko ingat ni playground?

 

Of course lah si BFF famous dia tu got better things to do kann..so orang tu tak la melayan Ajuwan ni. So Ajuwan pun masih la tetap meroyan, panggil orang tu retis fake la...sangkak la..hanjing la...

 

Of course, Ajuwan Ali sedar apa yang dia buat. How can he gets attention...walaupun attention yang cenggini?

 

Well. Ajuwan is a has been. Susah kot dia nak terima kenyataan yang dia dah tak famous. Pergi ibadat pun tetap tak happy walaupun dah pergi berkali-kali. He is very good at provoking people. And it is also obvious dia adalah lalang dan suka dengar cakap orang.

 

Orang macam ni pun...well, I would blame the follower yang puji dia melangit, unless follower dia pun gila macam dia, then it explains everything lah. Walaupun follower dia berjuta, yang komen tetap lah seciput. Sebab nak watching him is a free entertainment...and seeing him meghoyan mencarut carut  adalah hiburan.

 

Macam tengok pompuan latah. We know we shouldn't...but if we stop...then that's it.

 

Tapi apasal Ajuwan suka gaybashing eh? Dia tu jejaka muslimin mulia sangat ka? Bukan ka dia candidate penghisap lollipop hidup gak?

MCC

It stands for Minah Ceritaku Ceritamu.

This may be new to you...tapi kalau uols dah seasoned macam Kiah uols akan tahu siapakah MCC ni. How long have you been reading this blog eh?

MCC ni sekarang ..dah famous. In her own right. Zaman blogging nya agak kabur. Ye lah, para ilmuan mananya nak famous kann? Well, tengojk gak lah ilmu apa yang nak ko sampaikan. Ilmu jaga anak? Ilmu masak? Ilmu memikat laki? That one can jalan. But if your blog is something like promosi diri maka...payahlah untuk digemari.

 

Si MCC ni, from what I gather, she will parked herself at so many blogs. Blog yang famous la. Blog Kak Teh.....blog Kak Lang...blog Kak Chik what have you. Blog I pun dia ada parking juga. But I suspect MCC's interest to me was the association with UK. Elehhh.

 

Our path crossed twice...yelahh MCC ni peminat I. I dulu glamour...ye lah, expatriate diluar negaralah katakannn...ye!

With the rise of social media FB and the lot, nak jadi famous di alam maya ni senang ja. Gunakan lah saluran buatan Yahudi tu. Betapa kita anti dan menyampah kat orang Yahudi, dek kerana kepakaran Yahudi lah some of us dapat mem famouskan diri.

So easy...all you need is just a differ of an opinion or just a slight radicalism in thought processing. Pastu ko tulis dalam pesbuk. Ko maki hamun la sesapa pun. Well...make sure mangsa maki hamun you tu orang famous. Setakat maki hamun orang sebelah umah dalam hati will not make it far. Macam Ali Abdul Jalil lah...what he has to do is gunakan bahasa karat karat lagi nista melambangkan kuturunan nya. Shiannnn mak pak si Ali ni.

Then...kalau you set-set yang pro or anti vaccine? Hahh....keluarkan propaganda u through FB. You rasa vaccine adalah agenda medical industry untuk memeras intelegensia uols, u hujahkan dalam pesbuk jua. Tak cukup dgn itu, sila up kan persona uols sebagai seorang yang hostile dan meremeh-kutuk ideologi orang lain. Zasssss....u be amassing followers. Konon nya you telah berjaya menghurai sentiment mereka dalam penulisan you.

 

All these differing opinion will make you famous. You adalah jentera kata-kata yang tak terluahkan oleh mereka puak-puak yang tak pandai nak mengappplikasi kan idea mereka dalam bentuk tulisan.

 

Not everyone is cut to write, ya?

 

So what is the story with MCC? Setelah berjumpa barang dua kali dengan MCC, my heart tells me that there will not be any more to it. Pelik perangai nya. You know, people who gaves out impression mahu bersosialan tapi bila bertemu, you rasa dia macam psycho tudung saji gittew.

 

What is socialisation and what does social inclusion is all about?

 

Bila kita berjumpa kawan baru, kita borak2. Kita pi la minum kopi..or makan-makan. Jumpa dalam alam maya kenkadang kita boleh joke-joke dalam tulisan tapi joke direct-direct kita tak reti cara. MCC talked about herself non-stop. Haiyoo. In a way I am thankful la jugak memula because then I ni tak lah payah bercakap banyak.

 

She talk, she talk and she talk. Because we are at the eateries, of course lah the longer time you spent at your seat, you have got to keep ordering food or drinks. Wah..selera makan boleh tahan ya...macam macam jugak di order nya. Sampai I dah rasa penat dan pelik dengar dia cakap, I pun cakap lah yang I nak kena balik.

 

So, bila time kira bill, MCC hanya duduk senyum tunggu I bayar. Padahal I hanya lah minum dan dia yang lapar pi pilih tempat makan tu dan order macam babi feedlot. Opps.

 

Bila dia keluar dgn kawan I pun, macam tu jua gaya nya. Order persis babi feedlot, and orang lain bayar bill. Pastu dia bersidai kat rumah orang tu macam tak reti nak balik sampai my friend dah buat aksi aksi terlelap.

 

After that, perhubungan diteruskan lalu FB, which is thank heavens bearable! Tapi seperti biasa she will make a very loud statement sampai memualkan. BIla nak suruh I beli barang, oh can you go to Boots kat sini, sini and sini address nya...in a way to show off la yang she know her way around London. Weii...Boots ada serata UK okay??

 

Then bila I kat Spain, she tulis panjang2 on my wall offering spanish translated words...eh? And yang paling tak sanggup, start visualising Spanish men.

 

Tu belum lagi dia share fantasi nya pasai jantans ye uolssss! Tapi dia ni berimej Setazah.

 

Nowadays, dia amat active di FB, terutamanya di wall jantan-jantan bermikiran sado. Comments that she made. As if she thinks she is one of the guys.

 

Of course since I taklah serius dalam perhubungan kami, selepas I rasa dia ni set-set yang tak boleh I nak bawak balik jumpa kengkawan sekapal I, maka I hanya membiarkan dia begitu saja. Sekali sekala dia akan buat komen menyakitkan jiwa yang secara pantas I padam sebab I malu membaca nya.

 

See, I malu tau baca. Dia yang buat komen tu tak rasa apa-apa gamak nya. But what can you expect when she can openly share her fantasy aboy about men?

 

Pastu dia kata orang sekelilingnya kata ghopa dia macam Naelofar. Naelofat ada lahhh heh. Pastu dia kata ghopa dia macam KimK pulak. Ye lah, dia kan ber vangga dgn kuturunan kuah Nasik kandaq campuran dia tu.

 

Setelah itu I dengaq cerita dia amat famous dalam media social. Kat memana ja dia ada. Potong stim Kiah betul. Pastu dia suka buat komen lucah melucah and I also read somewhere she will private message people to gain information about some eligible bachelor.

 

Recently she made the mark again..of menjadi batu api.

The extent of what she will do to be in the game.

 

Dahagakan perhatian sangatkah sampai kan negative attentive pun dia mahu?

 

I actually rasa kesian. Sama macam saya rasa kesian pada Ajuan Ali. Si MCC ni terus dibagi perhatian oleh orang-orang yang tahu lubang tergolek nya. When one day she really tergolek, all they do is to laugh.

 

Some of us are oblivious. WE cannot see the damage we are doing to ourselves and to others. Ada yang tahu tapi, tak nak cakap apa-apa sebab tak mau gaduh.

 

Sekarang ni MCC adalah batu api ronson yang tegar. I think everybody around her know where she is heading, the level of destructions. But people are just talking behind her back.

 

(Me and Kiah included..tapi kan kitorang ni adalah penganalisa screen captured info ja)

 

Semoga one day si MCC ni akan dapat tengok yang dirinya tu adalah interesting..tanpa menjadi parasite.

Sent from my iPhone

Taking Sides Part II

This business of taking sides is sucks.

 

With friends, at least dengan kelebihan mulut longkang yang later will be excused for 'speaking your mind', you can just say..heyy..leave me out of it. Betul tak?

 

But kalau yang berpatah arang what not tu is a relatives yang tak boleh nak di elak, camno lah tu?

 

Here a strory. This elderly couple...well, idok lah warga emas sangat, but just passed pensioner stage and still in a good shape. I tell you the bini (sadly is a relative of mine) memang dari muda ialah cap longkang. With all these modern technology of environmental modernisation, her mulut is still longkang. Perangai pun longkang. No amount of umrah , haji usrah or syarahan Mufti Menk yang dia dah pi will change her longkangness.

 

She have got away with it for so long because no one wants to spare anytime to confront her. Partly kesian kat laki nya. Lakinya baik. Well...okay lah. Baik lah kann...apa yang weols nampak. Belakang we don't know.

 

You know the sort of people yang walaupun mulut cam shial but you still manage to detect some ounces of goodness? Well she is not it. I know of people yang mulut laknat but then you still ada hati nak cakap, well, takpalah..despite mulut cam shial tu, hatinya baik. Makcik I ni takda langsung zarah kebaikannya.

 

Okay. Recently ada gossip liar yang later turned out to be true yang lakinya telah berkahwin baru. Baru dalam ertikata baru is 13 years ago!  And the heaven opens, I tell you. How we find out is that dia pompuan longkang ni masuk spital because she pitam or whatever. Then masa kat spital didepan congregation yang melawat dia, dengan kelongkangan abadi dia boleh pi cakap kat semua orang yang disitu, that this (her predicament) is because lakinya dah kahwin lain.

 

Her laki was there. My mother was there...so thanks to modern technology, we got to know about it through family whatsapp. Her bedrest status didn't stop her malukan lakinya. All the name calling...walaupun wire and drip penuh sekelilingnya, mulutnya bak halilintar.

 

Si tukang pencerita (yakni my cousin yang menaip message whatsapp live telecast) kata even if she is hospitalised because of stroke dengan mulut herot berot, dia masih mampu menyumpah seranah laki nya.

 

Behind her back, we said that she deserved whats coming to her. The uncle is a decent man. So we got invitation to kenduri, and the aunty longkang dah khabor kat segala sedara mara, that she will not go if Uncle got the invite.

 

Since peristiwa berdarah depaorang (err the kahwin lain episode) hidup sedara mara menjadi payah because of 'imposed' demanded allegiance.

 

Their anak dah kena paksa not to visit apaknya, if not aku bukan ibu kandung mu.

 

In the end, semua sedara mara terpaksa take her sides sebab taknak dia drama Tamil.

 

My argument now is....why semua orang bingai nak jaga hati dia walaupun dia macam civai perangai nya? I told my mother that now she is the eldest in her family, she should really put a stop to this. The woman is a mad one. Yes true, we don't layan orang gila but layan and giving in is two different things.

 

Macam Ajuan Ali laaa.....we can say, jangan layan all his crap bags. But if someone had a put stop to it, takkan dia masih lagi nak jadi sasau gittew kan?

 

People worry about having caught or being in the middle, don't want to be in the difficult position etc. But bila orang tu dah obvious nya salah, why must you spare her?

 

So what if you laki kawin lain..diusia usia kau berdua patut ke Mekah and beribadat sesama. Nak buat cemana kann?

 

Yes, she has been duped for 13 years...orang tu nikah lain dia tak sedar. How come eh? You so engulfed in your perangai jahat tuhan butakan mata you kearah benda jahat depan mata you.

 

Now the aunty is fighting for divorce. Within the last couple of months, we have been caught in so many crossfires we don't need to. Sedara meninggal and both estranged couple were there, kita nak tegur pakcik tu pun takut makcik naik antu. The pakcik being himself will come and socialise with all of us, tapi bini dah menjerit. Anak cannot see their father.

 

Bodoh sangat!

Penyepit Azwan Ali

Tajuk apakah yang mengaruts ini uolss?

Ye, disamping berita jenayah yang lain dalam Malaya ni, hari ni jua saya terbaca berita yang AA telah ditimpa musibah dimana penyepit nya telah di copet. 

Macam2 musibat/musibat yang telah menimpa melayu sorgaaa yang berfeeling-feeling diva divana, dewa dewata nih...

Takziah saya ucapkan. Semoga AA tabah menghadapi dugaan ini. 

Seperti dilaporkan...Ajuana ni alleged yang dirinya yang kurus gilerr itu telah disihirkan. Wahh wahh..dijaman serba moden ni, ada lagi manusia yang nak menyihir Ajuana Ali ni. 

Apakah criteria nak kena sihir ni uols? Adakah kita perlu mencarut, memaki hamun sepanjang masa lantas mempercepatkan proses penyihiran kita?

Adakah kita musti se famous Ajuana untuk melayakkan diri kita disihir?

Adakah saban pagi kita kena upload video kita kira deduit (yang tak la banyak mana punnn, balik balik itu ja duitnya) huntong menjual rendang nya?

Adakah kita perlu upload video kita ja melayu yang mampoo breakfast kat Kopitiam mahal dan sopping di Peviklion dan mengutuk pepara melayu-melayu tak berapa sorga yang lain?

Entah lah...keshiann makcik ni. Agaknya pasal tu lah dia kena sihir..katanya....(err tak pulak dia kurus kering, kannn?)

Sebagai melayu sorga, dia nak jamu anak-anak tahfiz mai baca yassin halau puaka from his Astana, pastu seperti biasa, mana melayu yang menjilat tapak kakinya akan jatuh taraf melayu sorga. Tapi nak dijadikan bala selepas dikencing dek Ustaz Tahfiz, bibik-bibik upahan pulak telah menyebat penyepit dia...

Wah wahhh..persis kehilangan uang emas nan berjuta, Ajuana telah hangin dan ugut nak sebarkan dalam IG dia. Hik hikkk...IG ye uols, bukannya balai pulis.

Mesti penyepit yang hilang tu adalah bertaraf Queen Anne ya uolsss...tak pun bertatah Swarovski juta-juta rega nya...

Disini, I ingin menyeru kepada uols...marilah kita berdoa untuk Ajuana dan penyepit nya dipertemukan kembali...

Aminnn.

Sent from my iPhone

Taking Sides

Uols..bebaru ni kannn ada cerita pasai seorang VVIP yang 'terhilang' dari rumah nya....maka risaulah segala family member. Ya lah, si VVIP tu ada penyakit ingat-ingat lupa kearah lupa terus gitu.

Maka, habis jentera media social dikerah untuk mencari apak/uncle/swomi yang hilang ni. Menurut pak guard mereka, si VVIP ni keluar naik teksi.

Then adalah sorang kawan I ni, dok message I kata, eh my Uncle hilang...and terus lah forward kat I gambor VVIP tu. Dalam hati I, bila masalah ko bersedara dgn VVIP ni khennn?

But knowing this girl, dia suka cerita yang dia ni actually bersedara sparepart dgn ramai VVIP, sampaikan dgn kita punya PM pun ada bau-bau tahik meow dgn dia. Tu diahhh...semua sedara mara set-set VVIP terkemuka giitew.

Dia ni pulak, kalau ber gossip about satu-satu perkara or people, dia punya sumber tu macam lah dia ni duduk sebelah rumah orang tu.

For e.g. lah kann....this famous guy ada scandal dgn segala anak ikan yang akan di camouflage kan sebagai anak buah lah, PA lah..itu lah ..ini lah..padahal secara terang-terangan nya ko akan tahu, apahal si polan tu tetiba berpangkat anak buah, padahal si Polan tu berasal dari Kampuchea. Sejak bila pulak ko ada connection dgn Kampuchea, unless ko memang dah pernah produce anak tak sah taraf kat tempat tu, kannn?

But yes, duduk didalam lemari baju ni payah ye uols...one may wonder, why you want to be in the almari baju in the first place? Of course this beg a big can of worms and more questions to be asked and argued, so, lets just not go there....

But pompuan pembawa mulut lagi bersedara dgn segala VVIP ni ada banyak pulak sumber berita kononnya adik beradik this guy sendiri dah fed up dgn perangai nya. Wahh wahh....once I asked, mana ko tahu...kot la dia nak cakap adik dia yang bagitahu I sendiri or somewhere along the line ko dapat info dari mulut kuda kannn?

Tak, sebab dia terkantoi dgn soalan I, dia pun kata, ala, semua orang tahu. Katanya....

So, berbalik pasal kes kehilangan VVIP dementia tadi, si Milah bersedara VVIP  ni tetengah malam message I kata VVIP dah dijumpai dan dia sebenarnya dibawak lari oleh family isteri tua nya. Then mulalah si Milah ni kata elehh, family bini tua memang suka control la..macam-macam la....

Sebagai seorang yang agak terror la dalam bidang organic mental health ni, I cakap lah, maybe dia tak tak ingat kot yang dia ada dua bini, and he is incline to go to number 1. Selalu jadi camtu tau uols,..ada sedara belah my father yang dah kematian bini jaman tok kaduk dedolu, diakhir hayat nya dia dok tanya mana aruah bini nya..padahal bini kedua nya tu dah berpuluh tahun gak jadi bini dia.

So mulalah si Milah pun melancarkan serangan moral terhadap bini dan anak set-set pertama. Memandangkan Milah ni pun adalah bini ke 3, memang tak syak lagi lah side siapa dia nak ambik kannn?

Disini daging nya....kalaulah suatu hari nanti kita berjodoh dgn laki orang, I mean, kalau bukan lah kita yang goda jantan tu knowing his circumstances, then itu jodoh nama nya. I know a girl yang kematian laki, ditinggalkan dek laki dgn anak2 yang kecik...bila anak yang tua dah masuk jah 2, barulah hatinya dah terbuka nak ada pasangan hidup. But jantan yang berjaya mencuri hati nya ialah laki orang. They met through work...and this guy dgn directnya pada satu hari ajak dia kahwin. Nak kata pi dating memadu kasih tu takda lah, only group lunches gitu. Dia pun adalah hati gak kat mamat ni.

But she gives syarat to him....your wife need to consent to this. So dengan bini yang masih muda lagi, well, not the age where ko layak mendapat adik angkat la gittew dan berbagi laki...of course 1st wife tak kasik. Tak cukup dgn 1st wife tak kasik, dia kena serang dari segala macam angle pulak dgn anak2 orang tu, kawan2 first wife, sedara mara 1st wife...dan mak pak si balu ni sendiri. Ya kengkawan , my fren ni pun family nya tak kasik dia jadi bini kedua.

Bila si balu ni diserang, kengkawan yang ada disekeliling nya ....decided to remain neutral in whatever it is that happened between my friend and that person. 

Wahhh....I am talking about friends yang tahu the back of their stories. I know some of them juga kawan dgn 1st wife, but the friendship is based on sebab suami nya, meaning kalau takda lakinya idoklah dia nak kawan dengan diorang. 

Our friends? Of course set-set bini orang is so against kawan kami ni nak menikah lagi. Every single ladies yang lain pulak ala-ala go for it girl. So it creates a divider amongst us. To some extent, a lot of FB culling I tell you. Tengok pesbuk macam drama petang TV3. 

Being neutral in some situations is taking the easy way out. I know some yang malas nak menyakitkan diri and at the same, want to remain supportive to my friend. Ni set-set yang bila tengok kawan tu kena maki dgn kawan sendiri, dia kata dia tamau takes sides.

I pulak...okay, maybe pasal I tahu sebanyak sikit. Of course amik laki orang is not on. But here's also a story of 2 random people fell madly in love. Some of us cakap jugak, takda salah nya jadi bini ke dua...bukannya ko rampok or kikis duit orang tu. In a way, you want to show love and legalise sex...hehehe (betul kannn?) or would you rather laki ko jadi cam tokey Chenna yang lain berderet pompuan simpanan nya sebab deme mampooo?!

The solution there's plenty of fish takleh digunapakai langsung here...because, kalau ini cerita memilih ikan, dah lama si balu ni kahwin. 

Me and few friends had to take sides. It's a matter of principle. She has done so much for us and she is a good person and did not deserve the kata-kata nista. The least we can do is to be her friends and memberi kata-kata perangsang seperti, I will come to your nikah do. 

How can you stay friends with her and her pencerca and remain neutral? No, I won't and I will choose a side. 

Apa kena mengena cerita kawan I ni dgn VVIP tu? Well, sebab bila dah jadi cenggini pun persatuan bini-bini muda seantero Gombak Setia nak rebut kuasa. This VVIP mesti lah pergi menghilangkan diri dgn relahati kat umah bini tua nya, kan? Kalo tak takkan sendiri tahan teksi?

Tak tahulah circumstances apa sampai dia berbini dua, but being an ex Minister, dan henshommm, of course dia mampu. So kawan I ni dok la ngumpat si keluarga bini tua tu, macam lah dia pulak bini ke 3 orang tu. 

Okay moral of the story yang tahapa-hapa ni, sides is there to be taken.

So, take sides wisely. Jangan amik side sebab ko pun set-set bini tersorok pastu ko sokmo rasa teraniaya. Pigidah. Jadi bini ke 3, apa teraniaya nya jantan itu dan diri mu?

Bibik Babik Part 2

Selama-lama ni....when my sisters dok mengeluh about their Bibiks, all I can say (dalam hati laa) is that...ehhh teruk benau kah? Misti korang la yang jahat nehhh...kulikan onggaji tu macam2...and all that anak-anak yang serupa anak siamang, manalah onggaji memasing tak ngidap PSTD kannn?

My Amma had her fair share of Bibiks trouble. When we were little, Amma hired onggaji that we are not allowed to call them onggaji. Hishh..onggaji is pretty much parents substitute. If we don't like them, we have ways to tell them how and Amma bear the brunt of it. 

With my first Bibik gone..though I must say my cats (and me) did at some point mourned for her loss. That 1st bibik loves my cat..all of them. Sampai sekarang I masih tertanya-tanya, apalakah dan manakah salahnya semua ni?

Tak cukup baik kah I? Tak cukup kah kebebasan yang I dah kasik? The amount of time I have been pulling my hair finding answers, dan nasib baik lah tak botak.

Then I managed to get the 2nd one. I asked this mate of mine yang kononnya banyak lah contact. With my ciput bajet, she managed to get me one and warned me that I need to spend some time training her, because there are cases where this Bibiks are originated from places where the sun didn't shine and that they never heard of stereka or mesin basuh. Hishh like that oso got ye gievn that we are in 2015!

I was told this bibik is 50 and she asked if if I mind about the slightly advance age. For someone who is 43 and lasak bak Angelina Jolie, 50 is nothing la..bukannya I nak suruh dia buat acrobatik melampau kemas rumah sampai tak tido. I wasn't around when she was received by my colleague. All that was presented to me is a woman who is Amma's age approximately, tempang and to add to all this, bercakap bahasa Indon purbakala yang hanya dia ja yang paham!

Mengenangkan kawan I yang dah tolong...and money that I have paid, I sanggupkan saja. My 1st criteria ialah...you must love cats.

Yang hado? Dipandang nya kekucings I macam pandang anak tiri. We are talking anak tiri if ko nikah dgn bapaknya yang meskin. Kalo apaknya kayo bak Mat Al Fayed, biorlah anak tiri kau ada 26, ko akan bermanis muka laaaaa dopopat jam.

But she had a go at the work...she knows that to still keep her job, she have got to be nice to anak-anak bulus. But when I am not looking, dihambat nya bebudak tu dgn penyapu. 

Her cleaning skills is a lot to be desired. Same goes with her personal care. Atas dasar kemanusiaan, I ask my colleague to go out shopping to get her stuff so that she can look and smell presentable. 

Yes, we have to teach her everything...not only that you spent time teaching, her quality of work punyalah...and you got to spent more time redoing it. 

Bila kena tegur...disuruhnya kita hantar dia balik tempat mak bapak nya. Wahhh...ko berfeeling anak-anak dara sunti mehhh? 

While I was away for 2 months, my colleagues yang kena deal dgn dia. So I was spare the episodes tikam diri sendiri dek tak tahan dgn perangai nya. 

I keep telling myself...so I can't kid myself anymore. This Bibik is a liability. She is old and serba serbi takleh pakai. I had closed one eye and bersabar sebab Bibik ni kalau masuk waktu she will cepat2 gi semayang, so that sort of appeal to me lahhh, I suka cenggitu so I can tahan kerja kurang effisien nya.

But her mulut laknat and her dirty looks on my cats yang I cannot tahan. So when I was away, I was seriously thinking of letting her off, takpalah with all the duit yang dah rugi. I haven't pay her so I ask her to go claiming her wages from her tekong who sold her to me. I told her and her tekong, you have obviously duped me into thinking that you can and would work for 2 years, hence the big fee you are charging. So, claim your wages from the fee your charged me and I will halal kan apa yang lebih tu. 

Maka bermulalah drama....her tekong don't want her back. Bibik started meroyan asking me to reconsider and say that she will sanggup a pay cut.

Then of course, hati I kan mudah kesiannnn?! 

Then it was Raya Haji. Everyone has gone home leaving me with Bibik and her bahasa kebangsaan yang I tak faham langsung. On raya day, Bibik pestered me for her wages. I said, wait lah...today kan holiday manada nya bank bukak? Everytime dia nampak muka I macam dia nampak mesin ATM. As if she doesn't know what wait means.

One day, she disappeared. Eh? Honestly dalam hati I bersyukur because, although I dah berhati kesian..I don't think her staying put will help me so the week after raya tu memang I dah plan nak hantar nya naik bas to belah.

I takdalah merasa apa-apa kehilangan bila Bibik tu lari. Dah la I kena basuh balik rumah anak2 bulu I and from there I realised the extent of ketidak efisienan Bibik ni. So, no love lost lahh.

But....her tekong called and said that apparently Bibik was rescued by her fellow Pulau Madura Casablanca fellows. Rescued?

Bibik dgn bangga nya cakap...yang selama ini keroja I adalah menyeksa Bibik2 I yang sebelum ni and that's why la depa lari. Bibik also said that seluruh kejiranan I tahu yang I ni jahat dan suka menyeksa Bibik.

Bibik claimed that she wasn't fed on top of dia dikerah kerja berat sampai dia tak larat...

Adalah terseksa hidupnya dgn I...tangan nya bercalar balar kena seksa dgn kucing I. Hishh...

I told her tekong first, if you had handled my cats with kasih sayang as an animal lover that you claimed you were, maka idoklah tangan ko akan calar balar.

2nd part yang tak makan tu yang I tak larat...with adanya tukang masak (mind you this Bibik cannot even cook to feed herself) yang memasak hari-hari, kalaulah dia tak makan tu adalah pembohong gamak nya.

3rd, kerja berat? Dengan kederatnya yang sebanyak itu...apalah kerja yang berat sangat sampai most of time I jumpa dia dia tgh terlelap atas sofa?

Babikkkkk la sangat.

I cakap la dgn my friend yang tukang supply ni....I think you all hantar lah dia balik negeri dia..because not only that she can't work, dgn keadaan dirinya yang dah nak habis season tu, tah tah besok orang lain pulak yang kena jaga dia.

And I cakap la jugak betapa bengang nya I yang kawan I ni sanggup la bagi I tenaga kerja yang ghopa ini!

So, now the useless Bibik has gone. 

My cats are soooo happy!

Cerita Retis

Uolss....

1. Semalam, sepulang nya saya dari Negara UK yang lain, dekat underground station Victoria, saya nampak Tengku Adam aka Keith Foo dgn makwe dia. Mereka berborak dalam bahasa melayu cakap pasal ramainya orang dalam tube itu. Saya dengar tapi berpura-pura menjadik Pilipin.

2. Umum telah pun mengetahui betapa laknat nya mulut Chef Wan. Oops. Dia taruhhh anak buah nya dalam pesbuk nya. Katanya set-set tu femalas dan tahunya tidoq aja. Dia la kluaq duit bla bla bla. Cakap pasal sedara-mara persis kerbau balau ni, saya percaya, selain dari Chef Wan, kita juga ada jugak bersedara dgn set-set ni. Di hari raya tu hari, saya barulah terperasan yang hadik hipar fomfuen saya ni pemalasss nya ya rabbiiii. Kerja dia hanyalah menchantikkan diri, main smartphone, tengok TV, makan doyan, makan Nasik himpit campur segala condiments, tidur, main sikit-sikit dgn anak-anak dia, tidur, makan, main phone...cam gitu lah ulang -ulang sampai dia berambus balik kerumah makpak nya. Bila saya skodeng FB hadik hipar saya ni...keroja nya ialah update status macam dialah yang berbasah lengang baju kurung membasuh pinggan. Bila saya cuba utarakan isu ini dalam rancangan gossip adik beradik, ghope-ghopenya adik2 saya yang lain dah masak dgn perangai femalas si pompuan ni. But sebab lakinya yakni adik saya tak cakap apa, maka hal ni didiamkan sahaja. Uols rasa, kalau saya khabarkan hal ini pada adik jantan saya yang tetiba-tiba berubah menjadi Jibby laki Kak Mah, adakah saya bakal disaman dek adik saya tu?

3. Setelah puas memberi gambaran yang dia tu klapaq kasih sayang jantan, maka Abby ADIDAS  berlaki jua. You would think yang fomfuen of Abby's disposition would at least adalah rasa memalu sikit bab bab gini. Tak ye uols...hik hik. When she came out with statement, tak sabar nya nak dapat baby, it will immediately direct your mind thinking of the process untuk mendapatkan baby tu. Abby ni kan orang yang kuat agama...katanya..lillahitaala sana dan sini...tapi hal hal vanity cenggini, kurang sikit kemaluan nya.

4. Azwan Ali dan kempen anti-melayu jebawok nya. Dialah yang ber level tinggi. Sapa ja yang sokong dia terus diangkat menjadi great malays. Siapa saja yang puji-puji dia terus dia suruh uols muhasabah yang dia tu gah gah gah. Sekarang ni dia dah jadi towkay rendang. Katanya tersedapp dimuka bumi. Setiap pembelian akan dihadiahkan dgn promosi dalam intagram nya sebagai great customer. Bila dia sarapan kat OTWC ataupon sopping di Pavi, dia akan buat statement, see my level? Ko mampooo? Ye lah..ko sorang je lah yang berlevel sarapan or bersopping kat situ. Pastu dia akan buat pose-pose wajah gampang yang hanya monyet je nak pandang. ------I pun dalam category monyet lah gak sebab I dok tengok hari-hari. I am so addicted to pain that I have to torture myself looking at him.

5. Orang yang rasa dia macam retis. Well, ye lah segala macam hal dunia dia dia nak kena publish dan bagitau orang..sampaikan nak bagitau laki..please call me pun tulis kat wall laki and bukan PM mailbox lakinya. Gambar I lap yu Yu Lap Mi banyak nya jgn cakap lah. The whole world (or their friends) needs to know how steady they are...walaupun hakikatnya in private dia doklah ngadu kat kengkawan ketat yang lakinya macam siamang lah gatal nya dan tak memberi perhatian total padanya albeit segala macam promo yang uols nampak kat pesbuk tu. Bila time anniversary ka, birthday ka..mak datuk text ucapan pesbuk nya...nasib ja takdak live radio station dalam pesbuk yang dia nak tuju lagu. Kita yang tahu cerita sebenar ni, rasa nak tikam diri pun ada.

6. Ohh ni lagi sekor academician yang perasan retis. Kejap dia rasa dia macam Kim K dan lusanya dia adalah Nilopa. She just had to put her fingers in at selagi ada discussion ataupun post kat dalam pesbuk tu. Nak tunjuk pandai dan interesting but came out obnoxious. I am sure she is her students laughing stock. But seeing her so delirious, I have now resigned to the fact that all that was done sebab dia kurang perhatian and she is getting it at all cost be it menyebok kat wall orang, menjaja cerita ku cerita mu or membuat komen bangang sana sini.

Decorum's has now extinct.

Bibik Babik Part 1

Two days before Raya....one of my cats went missing. Ishh..ishh. Dia panjat washing machine and escaped through the grill.

When I mangkit sahur, my niece told me yang si Bee (nama separa sebenar) dah takda. Problem dgn si Bee dia adalah kucing yang dahulunya hidup dalam sangkatr sebelum di rescue oleh anak buah I. So, bila dia terlepas, samada dia tahu ke tidak nak balik...tuhan saja yang tahu.

Two days before Raya also, when my niece dah siap nak berangkat balik ke kamfung untuk cuti-cuti raya, dimalam yang hening itulah jua maka my Bibik telah dijumpai berkhalwat dgn jejaka Yenna ni. 

Astaghfirullahalazimmmmm.

To cut the story short, I finally have the courage to say to her KAU BOLEH PERGI MAMPOS and drove her to a bus stop few miles away. I didn't even looked back. I was so hurt. I telah menatang dia bak minyak panas, overlooked her flaws, diamkan aje bila dia menjawab, turn blind eye bila dia dok kat sofa macam mem besar with two feet's up, let her reign over the remote control and few other things other maid wouldn't dare dreaming of doing when their boss is around.

I tell you...I bear and I persevere all that nonsense from her...number one because she looked after my cats very well sampai obesity melampau and second because she pressed my clothes well.

Things with the cats, agaknya..or for a fact I know that masa I dapatkan dia, my so called agent pembantu maid-maid pelarian sedonia ni....gakanya dah warning dia siap2 yang, nothing else matters but the CATS and making sure Boss kau makan. So yes, this maid of mine memang tahu where she stands with the furkids. 

Kalau kucing hilang, dia lah yang akan trauma dulu. You can see how relieved she look when cats returned or found. Tak payah I buat poster kucing hilang, dia akan harass neighbour neighbour I to let them know about the missing cats. I rescued numbers of stray cats knowing that I can rely on her menjaga anak-anak bulu I sementara I berpoya tengok wayang dan juga kerja terkutuk yang lain.

I only took the cats to the vet and she took care of them and making sure tablets are swallowed at all cost...I was spared from the scratch and bites.  My maid is the hero in this cat love story.

But I am beginning to notice yang dia dah lain. It crossed my mind that she wants to do a runner. Well, I can't say I am surprised. She ran away from her kononnya Boss yang kejam and landed on my hands. So if she had done it before, what stopping her this time?

Near raya, she told me that she wanted to go away. Wah wahhh....not that I ni kejam la kann...tapi I ni nak balik raya, so anak2 takkan nak tinggal tak ber supervisor? So I asked that she compromised with me...like let me balik the first two days and she can be released after. Mula2 tamau ya..dia kata she had janji with other maids (branik kau!) but batu-batu api serta penasihat undang2 I dah sound I, jangan bagi muka and that's what I did, I tak bagi muka pun. I stick to my gun.

Her weird composition become so obvious...half way through mengemas opis I, she will want to excuse herself balik rumah kata nak sidai baju la...apa la..ini la...

Still, I feel weird but I don't think of anything worst.

Malam my niece nak balik raya...was the malam last terawih. I came home from doing round of looking for Encik Bee. I was all over the place. Sedih tau. My niece also went round looking. WE stopped our cat rounds at midnight. She told me she tak sedap hati and want to check on the maid. Then I got phone calls from her...that Bibik was caught with a man in her room. NOT only that, my nephew took it upon himself pi belasah Yenna kekasih bibik ni and whaddayaknow....polis pun datang. I came home still clad in telekung into rumah yang dipenuhi darah.

Mak datukkkkkk. Dugaan nak raya. Dalam pala hotak I that time..I have got to sack this bibik and aduhaii, sapalah nak jaga kucing2 ku.

Tu belum lagi I kena grilled dgn Pak Polisi...and my day ended at 5 am!

Here's what had happened last raya....

1. I spent 3 days raya'ing at kampong. My best raya in ages...but unbeknown to my mother...everyday I sneaked back to Shah Alam quietly to check on the cats and balik kampong semula. I told her I pi raya umah this uncle lah..that uncle lah...kawan ni..kawan tu...

2. That night, the night Bibik was discovered with Yenna tak berbaju, I also discovered that she had already packed her bags. MY KPC neighbours bagi lah tahu yang ghopanya the Yenna is her regular occurrences. Wahh wah...not that I am jealous that she got more action in her life than mine ye?  True enough memang dia nak lari. But I scuppered her plan. I dah halau dia dulu.

3. Encik Bee masih hilang. (But he was found almost 10 days later in such a state)



Bersambung....

Edisi Teringat Zaman Lalu...

Waalaikumsalam uolssss.....ye, kepada yang dah memberi salam dengan pertanyaan, bila nak hapdate blog. Wahh wahh..idok ke nak Tanya, makji dah makan? Meh saya hantar kepci delivery sekotak.

 

Sejujurnya..hik hik hik..I mmg la busy. Nak tulis pun takde benda yang sensasi nak ditulis. Kalau start menulis kang, ada pulak yang terasa I tulis pasal depa and start beremosi. See, cerita hidup kita serupa dgn cerita hidup orang lain kenkadang kannn? Watak je beza. Kalau kita ingat laki kita ja drama queen, laki orang lain pun ada drama jugak malah agaknya drama besaq ngalahkan Chef Wan.

 

Kita gaduh or hangat hati dgn BFF kita, orang lain pun gitu gak masalah nya. We may have different subject of issues altogether but between people, tetap akan ada issue.

 

Blog ni tak ada manfaat lebih-lebih lagi apa yang I terasa nak tulis adalah kutukan terhadap orang-orang yang menyakitkan hati I. But again, as much as I ni cepat rasa sakit hati kat orang, macam tu lah juga orang lain kat I.

 

So marilah kita menulis tentang benda-benda yang boleh dijadikan iktibar. Ye lah sangat.

 

You know, suatu ketika dahulu saya pernah memegang kerjaya serupa Mak Piah. Contracy saya dua tahun saja dgn kompeni tu. Tapi saya hanya sempat berkhidmat selama 18 bulan.

 

Kerjaya itu amatlah tak disenangi oleh aruah Appa. His insolence towards the career is somewhat generalised. Mungkin jugak dia berdoa supaya jodoh I dgn syarikat tu tak lama.

 

Tapikan uolsss.....kalaulah tak kerana pengalaman dalam kompeni tu, I rasa, idoklah I menjadi manusia yang macam sekarang. Dahulu kala, I amatlah sombong ya...well still is, but ada jua masa dan ketika nya. Dulu I tak suka jumpa orang, senyum jauh sekali dan dok lah menyorok bila orang dating rumah. In school, I was the last one dapat kawan. Dah nak dekat hujung tahun, baru orang sedar I ni wujud. Masuk asrama sangatlah menyeksakan. Sampai ada orang cakap dengan I, I ni dalam hitlist untuk dibuli sebab tak tegur senior.

 

To those who envied us the kebaya ketat ladies, well don't be. You don't know what it was like to get past stressful days when all you want to do is cry. Wahh wahh....

 

Okay..aokay lahhhh. Flight attendant it's not a BAD job. There are always two sides to something. I came home to a recession period. I don't come back to gomen or GLC office. I had to apply for jobs and lucky enough to be accepted in that bank depan restoran Syed tu. How ancient this was, bank tu pun dah melingkup.

I ada love-hate relationship with the job. On the surface, memang lah glamer ya...ko malam ni fly gi mana nyehh? Ohh I ada London flight gittew. I got the pleasure to have breakfast in Tokyo and dinner at LAX.

 

But the work is ya tuhan. Yes I earned minimum of SGD 1800 (in the 90's ye) but I can tell you, I have never work any harder than that! Flight crew adalah juga...

 

1. Waitress

2. Safety Officer

3. Baggage Porter

4. Bar Tender

5. Toilet Cleaner

6. Baby Sitter

7. Policeman

 

If you are not good at taking photos, you are still expected to operate a camera. Syukur pada tuahn, masa tu idoknya ada digital camera yang ko boleh try test tengok gambor kau, kalau tak, sokmo ko kena buat dua tiga take, kan?

 

All you can think about was, bila la bond aku nak habis nehhh sebab aku nak resign dah hehhh. Training nya 3 bulan ya. Please don't think that training tu hanya mengajar cara2 tolak trolley. Ko ada exams segala yang passing mark nya ialah 80%. Tu belum lagi trainers dok drumming into you how you need to look after yourselves as it is part of corporate image.

I enjoyed flying during my the first few months. I enjoyed the work, probably because it was new to me and quite challenging. Selepas itu, ianya menjadi macam SIAL! At times I was sooo sick of it. The agony of the irregular eating/sleeping hours, ko rasa hidup kau bak pesakit HIV jaa...demam tak baik-baik. Before probation, ko takut nak amik MC ye sebab takut kena extend. Ko kena kilat kasut your ward leader...sebab dialah akan menentukan ko pass probation ke tak. Crew dalam probation dipanggil P Plates dan dimasa ko memegang lessen P ni, adalah haram jika ko amik MC. I have days when I really have to drag my feet to work. Ko mandi bersabun banyak mana pun ko tetap gak rasa badan ko tak segar. Kan Mak Piah?

 

Sometimes for me it was bad that I akan nangis masa mandi dan tetengah blow rambut. I cried because I dreaded going to work, I dreaded the work itself- the nonstop labour intensive work where you literally walk to London.

 

Nak pulak masa standby. Standby meaning that control centre could call you up for any flight, especially if a crew had reported sick on that particular flight so you have to take her place. Ko jadi patung cendana tau kat rumah...nak keluar beli eskerim pun takut. Tu belum lagi ko dapat flight bangang....ie turnaround flight.

I don't know about other airlines but I am sure our works is almost identical. It is a super labour intensive!! Crew will enter the aircraft about 20 minutes before boarding of passengers. In 20 minutes here's your checklist...

•Set up newspaper trolley, cut all the newspapers meant for 200+ people and display them nicely

•Arrange the menu cards

•Dress the toilets with moisturiser, edt, toilet paper and rolls, make sure lavatory call light is working

• Combine headset bags, 3 into 2 because 1 bag only has 50 headsets and there are probably more than 120 people in the cabin.

• Heat up towels

• Do a security sweep for the cabins

 

Crew jantan..lain lak keroje nya ye.

 

Stewardess are the ones who face and serve passengers most. Our duties are all cabin-related. Jantans are in the galleys. Macam chef tapi chef kepada benda yang dah siap masak. They prepared drinks too. The stewardesses are the ones who face the wrath of passengers most of the time.

 

If you must know, stewardesses aren't allowed be seen in their uniform apart from the airport. On the way balik kalau ko rasa nak tapau Nasik ayam kat SS19 tu, toksah mimpi okay? Buang sampah depan rumah pakai uniform pun takleh. So, sila lah tahu yang cerita Pilot Café tu adalah penipu dimana stewardess bley pulak dok berganding dgn Captain. Mau mati meh?

 

Bila touch down, all you want to do is to go home, remove your makeup and take a shower and sleep. You know the feeling of being so tired to the point where you can't sleep? Happened to me so many times. When I get home I cry and remove makeup at the same time in my bed, when it takes me so long to fall asleep. I think there was countless times and unknowingly I cried myself to sleep. It's that bad.

 

By the way, I was such (still is) a docile person. I jarang kena zassss dengan senior crew. You know, hierarchy is a big thing in the airlines. Nak makan pun kena tunggu lepas senior ko kata, okay..u go and eat now. SQ. Like even when you eat you must ask your senior to eat first etc). I didn't get bullied or anything. I do know of other crews who did get it hard from the baju hijau. Err, kak Long pakai baju hijau ye...kita budak hingusan pakai yang kaler biru.

 

In this job, still in your blue kebaya, don't bother argue or explain your actions. For example if your Kak Long asks you "why you do this??" And if you try explaining yourself, it is seen as being argumentative and defensive. You should just say "sorry I won't do it again". Even if you are right, you are wrong sometimes. It doesn't make sense and I hate this.

And if your boss tells you off and tells you how to do things the "correct" way, you just got to just say  "oh I'm so sorry. Thank you for sharing with me I will take note". I cannot stand it. Obviously I don't mean it but I HAVE to do this to survive.

I tell you, passengers are easier to deal with as compared to the crew. Once you have awesome crew, it's considered a good flight even though you have nasty passengers. We fear passengers sometimes. We cannot say no. This is really bad because it has led to some passengers being so spoilt, unreasonable and they demand for the moon.

Let me tell you ya...local and SEA routes have the highest complaints rate. Ko buat flight Europe sector, aman damaiiiii. Orang Tanah besar, orang Tanah gersang gelap..and orang melayu kalau mengomplen....wahhhh nombor satu. Kalau ada nombor yang awal dari nombor satu maka itulah dia.

How do I handle nasty passengers? When someone is nice to me, I will be nice to them too. Kindness begets kindness, it's really natural for you to treat someone who is nice to you the same way. But for those who are rude to me, I will still treat them with some respect cause after all they are paying customers however obviously I won't be as nice to them as I am to really nice passengers. It's so difficult to be nice to nasty people.

Ada passenger yang buat ko macam....ye lah sebab dia rasa dia bayar flight tu maka dia bayar kau lah...nak mintak ayor, idoklah kata please ke menda. Picit lampu, got attended and seraya gampang anak satu dia akan cakap, APPLE Juice !

 

Tu belum lagi Yenna yang terasa dia set-set educated ber Englishkan Downtown Abbey yang buat remark condescending seperti, aren't you not going to offer to hang my coat off? Dia tu dah lah naik class EY aje ya?

 

Business class are a lot easier because all they want to do is sleep. Semuanya supermodel yang taknak makan...sampai ko pulak rasa takut dia pengsan sebab tak makan. Class EY pulak..hok olohhh...call lights bergemerlapan macam pokok Xmas adanya.

 

Passengers Mat Salleh adalah paling cool....suka jenjalan datang galley dan mintak air. Passenger Tanah Besar? Duduk sejengkal je dari galley, tetap gak tekan call lights ye. Fookey sangat.

 

On top of all these, I tell you...I really learned a lot. My tolerance capacity tank has increased. So much I am able to tahan my current job now.

 

I am also thankful that for this work, I travelled so much. I did fall into a bad trap dan ngabihkan duit shopping. I saved a lot of money.

 

I do come across young and bitchy crew who think they are good and right at everything. Now with FB segala, macam macam luahan perasaan yang you boleh baca. Hek lehhh. You think you so important ka? Don't fight the world la sayang.

 

Think again, kalau pangkat susah sangat nak naik during those time you keep on banging about how you can just tell people off yang tak kena dek mata kau, perhaps ko buat scene reflection sikit. Analyse sikit mulut kau yang macam longkang tu. Humble pie doesn't taste nice but, it is edible.

 

So yes...I appreciate little things and how I can spot air around people's head from miles away.

 

I learn to apply make up on...(not that I practise it anyway), buat bun cantik2...and maintain fringe cantik2. My weight is never 61kg above sebab kebaya do not come stretchable.

 

So...that's all for now. Yes..kerjaya glamer..but ko hidup dalam macam dlm goldfish bowl most of the times. Expected to look nice and moving about.

Kita...Dan Mulut Kita

I think a lot about the dead people recently. 

The news of people's passing in the beginning of Puasa, seems to stimulate the thinking even more.

Recently a friend remind me of my hutang kat dia. Err, speaking of hutang...yes, if we dowan to susah mati..or having to make that long walk looking for sipemberi hutang in our afterlife, we better start paying back hutang.

This friend cakap something along the line dia takut I mati. In a logic mind, you will say this 'nanti kalo ko mati' if kawan kita tu nak memanjat gunung..tak pun kalau naik MH. Ops. Tabbaik. Maafkan saya Chairman MH. 

Apa maksud kawan tu cakap macam tu, I pun tatau.  But lantak dia lah..mulut dia. Kita on the receiving end ni dengar sajalah. Dah pun namanya berhutang. Then I teringat funerals that has taken place in my own household. After funeral or maybe on the way to tanah kubur, an appointed speaker will announce that if si mati ada berhutang dgn sesapa, sila jumpa so and so the family member. 

So lepas hati I tersentap dgn kata-kata kawan I ni...(err I thought I should write that I paid my dues as much as I could, but maybe dia tak suka cara camtu when I just paid one chunk at a time..well, kalau I tahu mulut dia akan menjadi macam ni, I will do direct debit RM 5 sebulan, so that gives impression yang I ni gigih bayor hutang dia) I pun call my sister and my loyar...eh, you know this so and so...if anything happen to me besok lusa, can you open that red file and pay off my outstanding loan?

My sister jawab.....ko apesal? You owe people money eh? Not like you..usually is the other way way around. 

Loyar jawab....is this why ko angin dari pagi tadi eh?

To which I said, nevermind. If anything...you pay this person first. I don't want to die feeling upset. Nowadays people die just like flies. Sakit tu sakit ni...tak sakit pun bley mati. At this age...you should be really thinking of it. Of course I wish that I die happy not upset. The worst feeling in life is upset. Sad is okay. I am just about menyampah dengan rasa sedih because knowing me, tengok kucing kaki terpeleot pun I rasa sedih.

But I hate getting upset..because this feelings stays. Because upset commonly is a mixture of sad and anger. 

You know the type of people yang cakap..this is the way I am that I speaks out my feelings? It takes a lots of guts to do this. For eg that Azwan Ali man. His mouth is a sewer I tell you. Yes..he may have a good heart but to be able to carefully choose words that are hideous kumulus nimbus gittew? 

Heart and mouth is two separate entities. When we don't like that person that much perlakuan mulut jahanam would be easier. Because on top of us feeling bengang dengan orang tu there is also the needs to hurt them. 

Kan? 

There should be boundaries with friends. Masa I dok oversea, I don't bring back friends..physically or emotionally. Rumah ku syurga keww. I tido and tengok TV. I do a little bit ibadah....hik hik hik (yes, and tak sebanyak you laa) so, this friends that I talked to day in day out stays well out of my bed...my sanctuary.

Here....yes, we need to apply hidup bermasyarakat...hatta kawan edisi ngumpat sekali pun. Friends ask you to tengok cerita kat TV so that we all could berjemaah giving review pun nak tak nak terpaksa gak ikut. Yes..that can be fun. Only when you have the time. Where have all my times gone? Kerja la beb...cari duit, nak bayor hutang you. 

Hutang yang I tak minta but expected to pay. Macam berhutang dgn mak bapak la. Bila kita susah, makpak tolong...but we have to beringat to pay. In some case, macam I...I pay in bulk lah. Kucing wants to eat. I takda baju baru takpa but cats must get what they want first. 

Si pemberi hutang pun...patutnya kalau dah nak berbakti tolong sedara mara ka kengkawan, you know that by sacrificing duit you yang banyaklah jugak tu..you should also forgo other perks like mendapat dividen ASB kalau deduit tu tak dibagi pinjam. Takyah lah cakap I am short of a huge divident sebab ko lambat bayor duit keww. Kalau gila nak divident, toksah lah kasi orang pinjam ye tak?

I, of all people should know how to spot a sheep. Power alters your mind. This happens to everyone. To Pak Ustaz etc etc. Place yourself in the position of authorities...then see how you want people to nods the heavens down to you.

I do this too. I gave money to my mum. Supposedly when you gives, ikut resmi memberi...the people who receives can do the heavens they like. But the power of giving of me, menjadikan I lebih kurang gampang nya dengan setan. I start telling her how to spend it and I sakit hati pulak knowing she then dermakan duit I yang bagi to my brother yang at times thinks his savings account tu sentiasa dipenuhi duit. 

It was times like this (bila dah kena batang hidung) then I realised what a bastard I have been. 

Try having people under your payroll. We sings about betapa baik nya kita dgn dia so they can and shouldn't do us wrong. But when wrong occurs....habis kau kena carutz dalam blog.

No one should really take pride in possessing mulut macam laknat. It's okay if there's a cause..ya lah, kalau dah situasi macam haram yang memrlukan ko mengeluarkan lahar, maka kalo takleh tahan, kasik la kan...with iman still in tact. So, idok lah kata-kata tu kejiss sangat. 

There's always a time, a place and a person for this kata-kata nista or ayat2 yang bisa mencabuli hak asasi perasaan. Kalau kita rasa nak kawan lama dgn orang, berfikir lah banyak kali.

But then again, words can't kill you. But it can damage people emotionally. 

I am in the phase where I nak diam saja. Nak cakap lebih-lebih, I pun ada tak betul nya. I cakap dgn BFF I ni yang hati I sangat terluka dgn sipolan-sipolan ni. I have been nice to them. I know I shouldn't expect them to be nice to me back in return sebab I ikhlas lah nak buat apa2 yang I dah buat. But, perlukah nak melukakan hati orang? They are, undoubtedly nice to me too...but I wish that they see that invisible boundaries that just because kita ni dalam BFF zone, or..if we think we have a hold on that person i.e. orang tu banyak makan budi kau ka, kata-kata macam sial shouldn't come out. 

Sedih ni..but tak apa lah heh....after all, who wants to know kan?