Confirmed Sewel!!!

My persistent headache got the better of me this morning, and I had no choice but to ask for emergency appoinment. Ni lah kelebihannya kerja satu wings dengan sepital, nak appointment boleh mintak sesuka hati aje and tak payah queue. Penyalahgunaan kuasa betul.

Doctor yang bangang itu insist to have my urine sample dang dang tu jugak...macamlah kita ni ada built in batang paip kan? But because this headache is irritating, I managed a few drip, hah!!! Pueh hati kau, Doc?

We chat, in between the formality of surgery, ambik blood pressure and soklan-soklan lain yang menyayat hati...and whaddayaknow....

I have been prescribed an anti Depressant!!!

Tidakkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!! We argued. I'm in total denial. I told him, I sakit kepala aje, apasal pulak nak bagi-bagi ubat ni? I can see that he is about to write something in that chit, 'you're not going to sign me off are you, Sir?' Puaslah si Doctor tu sweet talk me, tak de benda lah , tu lah, ni lah...last-last, he came up with this

'I'm giving you a course of 28 days, see how you feel after that and okay, I will not sign you off work'.

Kiah & Bella, in our last meeting, did you see anything that can suggest an indicative of a psychopathic behaviour?

Arhhhhhh!!!! Arhhhhhhh!!!!!! This is very degrading.

(Bersambung.....I need some air. )

Sewel Lagi...

My weekend categorised into 3 splits happenings. While they maintained 'happenings' as in things that literally happened in that 2 days, if I may answer few confusions/questions from my far right shout box.

Husz, happy belated birthday? Not until January dear...and since we are talking about birthdays, January will mark that I am going to be as same age as Kiah. Now you know that Kiah is slightly older than me. So Kiah, toksah nak berangan ye...(haippp..dimanakah sifat sensitivity ku ini) But Husz, I will take this as an early birthday wish.Fenksss (Thanks in cockney accent)

To Yatie, blog gambar anak beranak pun takde hal...bagilah kitorang tengok.Manalah tahu, laki you hensem ke...waduhhhhh!!!

Siti Azrai, since you have been here, I'm sure that you are aware of the immigration formality thus I am not a qualified person to dispense advise. I have had few of my applications in the past turned down and that maybe made me understand how the HO people work and how to speculate decision.But please, other than what you already know from reading, fire away the questions.

The One With Tertinggal Mobile Phone (Happenings 1)

My boss, my partner is so convinced that the work stress had taken its toll on me.I was advised to take on another leave just to chill but being a denial that I am, I just passed this work hiccups as one of my occupational hazards.Bongkak betul.Although the sign is so clear...one being I tertinggal my mobile phone kat office untuk kesejuta kalinya. I was so excited making plans with MB nak jumpa Hjh Leemah (yang current statusnya menjanda until Friday) and suddenly remember that yesterday was her 1st Wedding anniversary. Dalam pada membuat plan, I left out one most important person in my plan, yakni Hjh Leemah sendiri. I did not confirm where and when to meet, but expect everyone to turned up happily on Sunday at where they were supposed to turn up.I had to rush back to office on Sunday morning just for that bloody Sony Ericsson. The first person I call was MB and of course, MB terpaksa scrap plannya dgn I, takut orang putih tu kecik ati and without MB, camanalah I nak beronggeng jemput Hjh Leemah. We had to devised.Sorry lah ye, Hjh LeemahRam.

The One With Being A Weekend Vegetarian (Happenings 2)

My beloved F, is a Vegetarian. A staunch vegetarian. When we first met and the first 2 years together, me eating meat is a no no in the house.I had to clean my mouth and make sure there is no traces of animal in me before I gi jumpa dia.Macam sial kan? I did made an effort to be one, mana tak nya, hari-hari kena brainwash...everytime I speak about buying fish and chips or KFC, F will then lecture me on things like, kalau I makan drumstick, F will them visualise any legless chicken walking around poorly sebab aku dah makan kaki nya, boleh tak macam tu? Or an entrapped chicken that can't make an escape for freedom sebab kepak nya dah dibaham oleh aku yang kunun nya tak ber peri kemanusiaan ni. Weihhh......tak banyak sikit, terkeluar lah jugak that image of wingless and legless chicken dalam kepala hotak I. I started eating salad and some pretend meat and this effort lasted only for 2 weeks and there I was, scoffing Big Mac again. Mampos lah!!! Disebabkan I ni boleh tahan jugak keras kepala nya, F can't do much but to lift the ban on animal eating from me. Only I have to eat it in the kitchen. Takpelah kan...

Anyway, last Saturday, I was out to do food shopping (by myself since kaki si tua tu sakit) and while combing through the freezers, I realised that I was so deprived of many nice things to eat and of course, they are animal for goodness sake! I become angry, sensorang. Most of the time when I am with F, I only eat vegetarian food, kerana chenta lah katakan....(chenta hapa benda ni, sekarang ungkit balik?) Sekarang ni M&S, Morrisons la, Waitrose la semua tunjuk grilled Turkey in their Xmas ads and for sure anything like that, will not be on our table during Xmas dinner. I came home home after shopping looking stressed, according to F. It is not until last night yang I bagitau dia that I feel that I was made to feel deprived from things that I want. Why can't I bring back KFC and why do we had to be in a separate room bila I nak makan ayam and why fish and chips is still banned from the house. Of course this gave F confirmation that I am indeed depressed pasalnya sebelum ni tak komplen pun. Banyaklah cantik...just because we speak out when we not normally do, kita ada mental instability ke? Sedap kan..orang putih ni buat conclusion?

The One With Midlife Crisis (Happenings 3)

Orang kata, orang pompuan takde midlife crisis. Well, I really beg to differ. Sesiapa pun boleh ada crisis kalau dia nak. Okay..I may resign to the fact that lately ni I felt quite mentally challenge. What you do expect, I never laugh so much in my life when I was attending our KLCC summit (as Kiah beautifully put it) we sat in that restaurant sampai kena halau, we eat, we drink, we gossip. I realised that is what I missed. A banter with a friendly and familiar faces...none of us was intoxicated and the only thing that was stopping us is that we realised that among us, 2 dah berlaki. I had so much fun In Dublin...and now in London, I just feel so crap. MB dah selalu tak jumpa and JT pulak...hishhhhh!!!! Sakitnya jiwa!

With F, my weekend is exclusive (unless kalau aku auta dia kata kena kerja, tapi lepas pergi Dublin la..pergi Birthday party kat Cambridge la...) Nak angkat telephone pun takut. I'm not sure what it is. It is only fair that your partner want only you after a weeklong of busy working pattern yang kenkadang tak jumpa langsung.I can understand that and I am happy to submit to this commitment demand. Macam motormouth, I told F about how I feel.Nak bergaduh sangatlah kan...

I suddenly feel that my life is so boring while orang lain buat tu buat ni, here I am feeling so recluse. When I was younger girls my age were trying out Marlboro & Salem Lights, ber experiment dengan pakwe (siapa budak TKC tu?) keluar clubbing and what not, I was at home being this nice docile girl with less demand to my parents. I feel so trapped. I even scared to cut my hair very,very short and highlight gila babi without thinking that father might mati sakit jantung menengok anak nya yang sorang ni. I asked F if I can do that and selamba aje dia cakap, keep it dark, I like it dark. But what about what I like?

F summarised this conversation into 'you are not ready for commitment, you hate being with me, you want to have fun with your friends and not me' and anything sewaktu dengannya.

I don't know what to think.

Sewel World

This is my 335 post (wuihhh..BIG DEAL!!!) and also my second post for today, live from work. Kesimpulannya cuma satu, yakni, Makji Esah telah melakukan satu perbuatan yang terkutuk, berblog dari office. In my profession, ni adalah dikira salah satu dari dosa-dosa besar, pasalnya, I work with the NHS where so many lives depended on it, akan tetapi, where others macam nak mampus saving lives, here I am still in my puny dirty office, typing this post. Like usual, my life stories takde satu pun boleh dijadikan iktibar. It is either I will tell you that

i) It is okay to tak bertegur sapa dengan sedara mara, mak bapak and kengkawan yang telah meng cross kan hati kita or

ii) It is cool to be gay, bisexual, omnisexual and whatever sexual orientation yang membabitkan diri kita dengan apa-apa saja, asalkan tidak ular and anjing (sebab Makji Esah takut ular and anjing) or

iii) Orang-orang kat Malaysia tu, dah dibagi public transport yang canggih tapi masih lagi tak berdisiplin dengan berpura-pura tidur dan mengabai kan mereka yang mengandung dan yang berpura-pura mengandung padahal terang-terang perut pompuan tu memboyot and conveniently disregard the sign to allow the seat to the memerlukan, sepuak lagi yang masuk train macam anak-anak kambing Mary and tak nak kasi chance pun orang yang kat dalam yang nak keluar and yang paling keji, dalam bus RapidKL meraba pompuan suci macam I ni dalam bus, akal mana ha?

I just realised I have not properly congratulated my SCANDAL, yang telah confirmed mengandung. Dalam pada dia busy berkerja dan mengomplen, sempat jugak dia membiarkan dirinya ditebuk tupai.Well, Kiah, tahniah semoga tercapailah cita-cita mu mendidik anak-anak tupai harapan bangsa. And kepada sesiapa diluar sana, ketahuilah oleh you all yang mengandung ni bukannya perkara mudah, walaupun masa nak membuatnya amat mudah, in out gussshhhhhhhhh!!!! Kiah is now having a hard time dealing with her emotions. Please, kalau dia nak makan roti canai, tolonglah belikan sebelum dia mengirai you all jadi roti canai.

I just finished my last session with a sexually confused middle aged man today. I have been seeing him for the last 6 months, we actually finished our work 2 months ago but because dia ni kiranya pesakit chronic jugak, I will have to keep my door open for him in time of crisis. He was referred to me again last Monday and because I am also in crisis and the only way not to think about my personal shortcomings is to keep myself busy, I agreed to see him.

Like always, he needs reassurance, which is easy to give, with a right words. Sometimes, I am so tempted to make suggestions. Hmmm...this guy is married with 2 kids but have been having homosexual thoughts eversince he can remember. For the last 2 years, he have been seeing a man half his age. He loves this man however, he feels that he is turning into a woman, emotionally for allowing his homosexuality takes charge of him.He feels the need to be with his wife so that he can renounce his masculinity.

Sewel ke, tak sewel? He is so graphic with his thoughts, macam dengar audio porn pulak. Today he confessed to me that he chose to see me (a female worker) because he feels the need to boast his ego as a man. Apa kejadahnya?

Like always, I am blessed with naughty and evil thoughts for my patients, and I certainly have plenty for him. Looking at him, there is no indication that suggest that he prefers a stick.But nowadays, looks are very deceiving. You can still do Aznil Nawawi and announce that you are straight like an arrow just because you got 2 kids.But, how am I to know what he really prefer kan?

Man say that we woman are selfish. We tend to want more than what they can give.In Malaysia, the jantan gatal will use this as an excuse to embark on an affair. Listening to this man, enough to tell me that it is really man that wants more than what we woman can give. Most cases are when men actually don't really know what they want. But still making unnecessary demands. Where have I heard that? JT kan? Si Tembam yang over demanding tu? Mana dia hah? Wouldn't you all like to know?

See you soon.

Mood Terbalik Episod 1

When I went home recently, 2 days before my flight back to LHR, I managed to sit tight at home and spent time with my father, whom I obviously avoided. Hmmm....bukan tak suka, but cannot stand the guilt trip my father is capable of giving, especially to his anak derhaka ni. It was the longest 48 hours, not that I regret at all but being already detached, physically and emotionally, giving in to the usual banter is something I try not to get into.

Orang kata, make use of all the time you have with your parents when they are still around. If you are a logical mathematics bastard, you may agree but as you know, anything can happen sekarang ni. Adik or abang can die before your elderly parents, and when they're gone, you will regret not being nice or spending time with them. This has happened to me. Speaking of being nice, you really should, tak kiralah to who, anak ke or mak bapak. Only, we are not obliged to. I have also seen parents regret of not being there for their kids.

I known few people who are not 'kamceng' with their parents or adik beradik. I'm sure they have their reason. It is so easy for people to say, alaahh, kita ni hidup tak lama, biar bygone be bygone lah.Well, itu you, bukan I. Senanglah you cakap kan?

I have my reasons.Since I arrived, I havent call my parents to tell them that I have safely arrived.Like I said, bukan benci or anything.My father and I are very close and after coming out from his shield, I learn to fend for myself and it is not easy.When I was bullied at school, I will call him and mengadu habis-habis.He was a busy man with places to travel, but he always have ways to reach out.In return for his loyalty, I submit to all his demands although that left me a very unhappy person.

At times I can be very lonely here and at times, I am this young girl who needs a father and a brother even. But, they are not within reach.Leaving KLIA every visits is not easy. I never allow any of my family member to take me to the airport.I don't like to look back. I don't like leaving them behind.

I'm not sure if one day I'll regret this, not being 'friendly' to my family. I told F that I miss my family. F said I should call. Speaking to them is only making things worst than they already are.This is just my way of coping. We are just different from one to another. People with unlimited supply of opinion are free to say how ungrateful I have been to my parents.But surely, they will never know how it feels.I think this is probably why I decided not to have kids. I am one myself.

(Nampak sangat kan, makan gaji buta kat office sekarang ni. Boleh buat posting tu before lunchtime)

Boring Stuff

Racked with guilt (ceh,aku cam pandai-pandai aje) TDM, boss ku yang berambut ginger itu, since semalam lagi dok hantar text la, call lah just to ask if I am holding up well (baru padan muka hang, ingat apa, I ni tak pandai menjawab ke?)

My partner reckoned that both of us behaved like 2 schoolgirls, as in, I dok merajuk-rajuk and si TDM dok memujuk-mujuk. The thing is, I told TDM that I was upset with her (as I write this, my kemarahan dah jadi past tense) When she was pestering for the reason, kepalaku yang beku beserta slow reception yang semula jadi, I can't think of why I was annoyed with her. Si TDM ni pulak, perhaps guilty gilababi (ye la, kat sini, kalau boss cakap kat orang bawahan tak bertapis, siaplah kena bawak masuk Industrial Tribunal)

I decided that I really have to rise above my shitty feelings by agreeing to speak to this Asperger guy, nak bunuh diri sangat katanya.With me already feeling like to kill someone and this guy dengan tak fed-up fed-up nya nak bunuh diri sendiri, our combination was perfect like a hair gel. When the session ends, I realised that all I did was staring at him. I let him talk and talk, answering his own questions and confusion, while I just sat there giving him a blank stare. I think that what brought my mind back to the room is when he asked 'What do you think I should do?'

Today I went to work an hour late. I decided to have a lie in longer with F, something that I have not done in the longest time. From what I previously wrote, you may guessed that we have a such volatile relationship. Sometime we do.We fight and argue and we both never win. I am such a headstrong character.And I often wonder why F had stayed. (Ni tak termasuk kisah-kisah kain buruk we all yang dah puas ku war-war dalam blog ni tanpa rasa malu)

On the tube, I realised why I was so upset with my boss. I was having a hard time at work prior to this, with all that back stabbing and stuff. Si TDM helped a lot, in her own way. Her tongue may be very sharp but she is giving as good as she can get.I have a lot of respect (walaupun my spare time at work banyak dihabiskan bersama Miss Nigeria bergossip mengutuk dia)

I made a list of my feelings today and in the end, I discovered that I was upset because I feel that after all the work that I have done, she still think very less of my capability and all made worst by showing me up to the bosses (by sending her emails to them) Tak sakit hati kau? I tried finding other similarisation, and I remember this guy, a friend of mind once told me how he fell out big time with his dad. This guy kira nya kera sumbang, didn't mixed with people his age and orang kampung and keep himself to himself. Although all that, he is very docile to his parents and will work very hard to pleased them, tak kisahlah orang nak cakap apa. One day, terjadilah satu masalah kecil and what his parents did was to listen to outsiders rather than believe in their own son. This guy told me, 'I can stand when people bully me, disrespect, slander me of all kind but what I can't take is my own parents not having faith in me'. Hah...sampai sudah lari dari rumah. Tinggal mak bapak, tinggalkan kampung.

That is how I really feel about the whole thing. Not so much on the orang sewel issue but with people that I looked up to the most, boleh question my ability. But, as I was told, 'This is business, we still have to deliver our service'. Meaning, segala feeling, feehlong boleh bawak gi masuk dalam longkang. Cisss...

Don't Read

You be surprise to know that there are some people who get their kicks by ruining someone’s day. I so believe that this is true. I have been having difficulties at work since I returned from my break (trust me, I wish it was longer) I don’t know why I become over sensitive lately ni and not wanting to blame it on the moon or more precisely my menstruation cycle, but this shitty feelings is generated from someone who can’t stand seeing other people ‘normal’.

Nak kata counter-transference (the psychological term people at work use if you carrying a burden of someone else’s shit eh? betul ke ni? something like if you pinch your right thigh, tah macam mana the left boleh terjangkit sakit nya...macam tu lah, if I'm not mistaken) it sounds like it. One of my special friends was recently impregnated during their limau Bali fuelled night of passion. By the sound of it, kedua-dua pesalah itu macam dalam denial tapi nak buat macam mana kan? It is so difficult to say no to the tupai and with the ‘L’ licence (Laki), maka tupai-tupai bebas menebuk lubang keatas kelapa-kelapa mereka. Susah betul, tak dibagi, dikata derhaka pulak kan?

Ada sorang lagi pulak tu, kena kapur bila gi gunting rambut. What’s with the timing lately ni? I’m not saying that this tupai or bloody hairdresser really set out to upset; it is just bad timing where every little mistake can erupt cam cirit-birit like chronic dysenteries. Sial kan? Nevertheless, to whom with extra baggage, what else can I wish for you but a smooth pregnancy and Bella, kau bomb ajelah kedai tu. Pueh hati.

I get easily irritable lately ni. Big chunk of it is due to some PS** at work yang tengah datang bulan gila and really kerjanya semenjak Jumaat lepas is to menyakitkan hati aku. I must say that majority of the next of kin to a PS** is doubly sewel than the affected one. For so long I have learn not to take things too personal with my patient and of course, we have our day’s yang macam sial, macam gula-gula and macam kopi tawar.

Things that I hated the most is when the bosses decided to side with the sewel’s and dengan tak ada etika dan moral nya, face you off to your patients. And you are now left with feeling so worthless, just because the patients are the clients.

Today, my boss si TDM decided to pour the hard dettol on my 5 inches wound (drama...drama...) by sending me an email, with copies to big bosses listing out the complaints made by the Sewels against my service and questioned my ability to give out treatment. I was shocked and stressed and until now, 12 hours later after I opened that damned email, I still can’t do anything but to stare at my computer screen.

I feel like to cry and I must tell you that I am not the sort of person who easily cry unless if I am hurt. I think I did cry dalam hati and nak terlepas jugak sikit-sikit when I told my partner. Out of anger and frustration, I replied TDM’s email. I answered all her questions and on the comments of my competency, I just wrote,

‘As for that comment, as a trained and qualified XXXXXXXX, I am confident of my own ability to manage the crisis situation, however if my non-panicky response in that situation suggest to them that I am incapable of attending to the patient crisis, I wish not to comment further but to ask you and the management to supervise me’.

After this email was sent, I took time to analyse my own state of mind and my inability to keep myself behind the wall of professionalism. I read my email out to my partner, who remains my best advisor. We agreed that it was emotional and rather confrontational. For hours I was agonising if I should apologise to TDM, but if I do that, they will never know how upset I have been over this.

TDM called few hours ago, just to check on me and to explain herself. I told her that I am upset with her for not backing me up and how she chose to take side with the sewels and by doing so, undermining my credibility (the only thing that I have at work) Do I feel much better after speaking to her? I am an inch close to ask for to be demoted voluntarily.That bad. This may be a small matter at the end of the day, but sometimes damped match stick can light the biggest flame.


**PS -Paranoid Schidzophrenia

Love Tales

Elviza, si Ratu Takleh tidur malam tu (mesti tidur dalam opis ni...macam orang yang kerja kat Klinik Pergigian Suster Ngesot tu) was asking to hear/read about love story. Untuk menyambut seruan itu (since I noticed that semenjak dua tiga menjak ni, aku macam dah takde cerita lain dok mengutuk JT aje) Takut la nanti, you all suspect yang I am concealing my real feelings pulak towards him. Real feelings? Benci adalah!!! A woman usually have high interest in love, not saying man are not but we woman, suka benar me reminisce kisah cinta, jadi and tak jadi. Macam la takde kerja lain. Hish!!! I now will share with you all my love stories yang terbahagi dalam category-category Balada, Irama Malaysia...eh silap nyah, category Requited, Unrequited, Putar Alam, Monyet, Project Angkasawan and Bangang. I’m sure there is many more catagories but as I am not a love expert and most likely at 34 only a love novice by nature, my love category is lesser than average. By telling this, you will now know that I am the most self-absorb, boring, perasan nak mampos, gila and anything sewaktu dengannya. I must remind you that my love stories are general, ada unsur seksual, persaudaraan, sumbang mahram ala-ala Mawar Merah and just simply, mengarut.

Requited (Cinta Berbalas)
Obviously, one my cinta berbalas is my cinta to my family. Tu pun baru dua tiga menjak ni. Masa kecik-kecik tak kira, although I know that my parents love me unconditionally. Adik beradik masa kecik semuanya cinta puaka and terpaksa. Geng hari ni and tak geng esoknya.But since masing-masing dah tua dan dah duduk jauh-jauh ni, my brothers and sisters are the best. Recently when I was in KL, my two sisters went to so much trouble finding me a Roti Jala. Of course la kan, Roti Jala in exchange with Mark & Spencer bra....macam la aku tak tau. But the feeling of sisterly love is more than the material value (walaupun Mark & Spencer bra itu lagi mahal dari Roti Jala) and the bestest part is to be together again on the same table without bitching about one another. Bless.

With my current partner, our attraction was mutual and the rest is history (walaupun adakalanya aku rasa nak bunuh dia) This is always the difficult part of the requited love. First, when you like someone and that someone is feeling the same, you got to balas their cinta. For substantial amount of time, you’ll be very happy.Then come to preserve and to maintain the longevity of love, which is not easy. At this time, you balas your own cinta because kalau nak tunggu orang tu, sampai mampos la. The love is there, just need nurturing and it is very hard to get the other party enthusiastically involved. Is this a love fashion? That wear and tear after certain amount of time or is it just men, who after number of years, become dysfunctional?

Unrequited Love
Yang ni, tak terkira banyaknya......Anuar Zain la, Acis lah (well, best woman win lah kan, Sheila?) Raja Nazrin la, ish...

But there was, a cinta tak berbalas story when I was 18 to 19 years...I was in NCUK, Shah Alam. I was at this time Siamang’s unofficial girlfriend. I still remember him. His name is Ayob and he was at that time working with my uncle. Siamang has a habit of making me feel so uncertain about him and about myself. During the period of uncertainties, I befriended Ayob. He is so good looking; never mind me, but who cares. The most important thing that time is that he has the look that kills and I was worshipping the land he walks on. He must know that I fancied him but, siapalah nak kat aku kan Kiah? Sampai tua lah tak lakuuuu...

Putar Alam
Siamang.Who else? We are talking about a man who swept me of my feet, promising earth, wind and fire, nak seberangi lautan api (eleehhh...lompat across longkang pun belum tentu) The same man who proposed and promised that he will eternally love me and no one else in this world and back again. The man who crooned Peter Cetera ‘Glory of Love’ kononnya untuk aku. ‘We gonna live forever, knowing together that we did it all for the glory of love’. As a woman, I can only dream if these kinds of lover exist. But this lover of mine eventually marries another woman. This lover of mine cheated on me, twice. He is the epitome of ‘Bumi ini berputar diatas paksi nya’. Really celaka.

Monyet (Puppy Love....eh..anjing kan takleh pegang?)
Honestly, I don’t think I have one. I am a late bloomer, tak reti nak ber chenta-chenta ni. Father said once ‘Masa sekolah takde nak cinta-cinta’ and so I wouldn’t dare. Furthermore, boys at my primary school are gundus and I entered Convent School during my secondary year at school and after that, MRSM...yang mana bebudak lelaki nya, okaylah...for example JT. Harap muka aje once upon a time dulu hensem. My first love is when I was 16 and he was the only man I ever love (ni tak campur unrequited love, okay?) And I really envy budak bohsia TKC tu yang kecik-kecik dah pandai French kiss ye?

Cinta Project Angkasawan (High Speed Love)
My own definition of cinta Project Angkasawan is cinta yang kenal hari ni, ajak kahwin lusa and break up next week. Wuishhhh....adalah 2, 3 orang. After siamang, during the rebound period, I met my Angkasawan no.1, a mid thirties millionaire. Many was surprise why his money didn’t enticed me. Jawapannya, money is one thing. I guess that my problem at that time is that I want something that I can’t have. Although I quite like to have his money, I cannot see myself falling in love with him. Adalah dating barang sekejap. He like to take me out for dinner and for a pompuan malas masak like me, cinta yang macam ni memanglah dialu-alu kan. He is under lots of pressure to beranak, maklumlah dah cukup umur and desperately looking for wife. Until now I don’t know what he sees in me but for sure, I broke his heart not long after we met. I hope he is now happily married.He is indeed a good man. I je yang sewel.

Angkasawan no.2, adalah budak yang 2 years younger than me. I tell you, I don’t do younger man. You must be at least 5 years older but this man is really persistent. Bad timing. I was on a rebound and yes, I used him to get over Siamang. Like Angkasawan no.1, I also wish him well.

Angkasawan no.3, one of my clerks. Ni kes, syok kat I, tapi bagitau kat orang lain. Sampai kat Pakcik jaga gate pun dia pi bagitau. I was about to leave for UK and then came his proposal, by text message. But it’s too late, rocket dah nak naik masa tu. And rocket tu masih belum turun-turun. Tersangkut kat Twickenham.

Bangang
I and my cousin used to think that our uncle (our mother’s half-brother) is hensem maut. Ish...really the sumbang mahram kan? This uncle and us are not that close so there is no such thing as uncle’ly love between us. We thought we fancy him or sesaja nak tiru cerita Mustapha Noor that ‘Mawar Merah’ where he fell in love with his anak buah and later died in a car crash.Tak kuasa laa...

Another of my cinta bangang is when I was younger (berapa umur tak ingat ni) and I was talking to one of my friend that I wish I can marry Chef Wan, so that ‘masak memasak serah padaku’. Bila ingat-ingat balik, apa? Kahwin dengan Chef Wan? Who needs Radio Station? I might end up physically and literally jahit mult dia dengan mesin jahit Singer.

Let’s do this as tag. I like to read yours, tak kisah lah sesiapa yang baca ni. Love stories is forever very interesting. Elviza, if you reading this, you may now go to sleep as I have successfully bore you to oblivion.

P/s To whose yang pernah baca blog Kak Peragawati Top. I must say, this is one that I enjoy reading the most. Good for my mental health. Unfortunately, his musings come to a halt and I never heard anything. There was a nasty rumours saying that he died in a crash. I keep on going to his blog, still no updates at the same time really hoping that the rumours is just rumours, after all, orang memang suka buat cerita-cerita mengarut macam ni. His blog become the victim of nasty people who posted nasty message during his absence. One day, it just gone, and only invited readers can read. I vaguely remember his email address and posted a message to him. I never hope to get a reply. This was months ago. Last Monday, I checked my mail and I saw an email coming from Peragawati. I am so relieved. Although I may never know who he is, at least, who ever he is, he is not dead. And he will be back. Maybe. Kak Prag, if you’re reading this, thanks for your email and hope to see you back in action soon. I miss you.

Happy Birthday to Belladonna......yang menyambut besday nya yang ke 03 hari ni....ehemmm

Happy Halloween

Opps, sorry lah yea, Sue Typhoon, but I had no choice but to join the celebration memuja hantu kat sini. I'm too old to do the trick or treat round lagipun, memalam sejuk ni (nowadays pukul 4.30 pm dah macam 9 malam) siapalah yang nak pi mengetuk pintu rumah orang nak gi mintak sweeties, nak mati beku ke?

Speaking of Halloween celebration, I did my bit by membeli topeng dracula yang dijual kat Tesco, demi memeriahkan Halloween Party organised by my office. Ikut hati tak nak pergi, but since dah cuti lama ni, kenalah tunjuk muka kat bosses, of which is the real 'hantu'.

Today is the day that you can see berjenis-jenis hantu, macam dalam catalogue pulak. Ada hantu bawak penyapu, ada hantu bawak sabit, bawak cangkul sikat (?),hantu liplap Kak Melah pun ada taw...alaa..tanduk lip lap tu, and ada jugak, yang tak pakai topeng hantu, tapi perangai hantu yang pergi rumah orang lempar telur ayam. Ni lagi celaka punya hantu!!!

The kids will start knocking on your door, screaming 'Trick or Treat' and as a tuan rumah, kenalah bagi cekelat ke, gula-gula ke or anything to please the little devils. But dalam pada 'Trick or Treat' ni, kena jugak jaga-jaga, because ada jugak yang akan ambik kesempatan merompak rumah orang pada malam-malam camni. So far, I will only bukak pintu for bebudak kecik aje, kalau budak besar...kalau nak treat, gi lah ketuk pintu rumah Cik Lee Novotny kita tu ye. But misti dia tak dengar kot, sebab dia kan tengah sibuk dengar lagu-lagu hantu puaka Kak Melah Liplap itu.

I wonder if I should take part, dressing up as a hantu to do my trick or treat round tonight. Instead wearing the conventional mask, maybe I should do the Asian hantu...dressing up as hantu pocong ke, Suster Ngesot ke or Nang Nak. I bet you, bukan setakat gula-gula aje yang aku dapat nanti..silap-silap, mati kena tembak kan?

Selamat Berhari Hantu, you all.

Missed Call and Mishaps

Isyyy...lupa pulak nak bagitau you all yang masa I balik KL that day, I missed out on telling si JT yang I will be out of range for couple of weeks (hish..chantekkk couple of weeks apa nya?) Plus, si tembam tu bukanlah manusia penting dalam my list untuk dibagitau kan? I am such a nasty person. When he asked what is my plan for raya, I told him, I takde buat apa, dok kat rumah aje. The poor mamat mulalah memasang plan nak menyambut raya dengan I (funnily enough, he texted his plan to me on the 10th, the day I arrived KLIA) and I pulak, bantai switched off my mobile until last Saturday.So si Tembam itu bersama plan-plannya hanguslah. Adakah ini salahku? Waduhhhh.....partly maybe.

Text received on 10th October at 11.25am 'Can I celebrate my first Eid as a single man in London with you? It will be fun. Let me know what is your plan for raya. Love, K. (erkk...LOVE? Sejak bila pulak pandai pakai L word ni? Sapa bagi hang kebenaran?)

Text received on 1oth October at 12.33am 'Let me know, please'. K (Ish....baru hantar text tak sampai sejam dah suruh orang balas? Ingat orang free sangat ke?)

(To cut this short, I retrieved 12 text messages sent by Jantan Tembam on the 10th October, the 12th one was a bit blunt, I have been texting you, your mobile is off. This is such a childish way to let a man down, a behaviour that I don't expect from a person like you. Pls call. Kx. Macam puaka kan? Dia ingat ni zaman Idi Amin ka boleh gertak-gertak pompuan camni? Pulak tu, terserlah kebangangannya, dah dimarah nya I, pastu macam muka seposen, boleh dengan arrogant nya suruh I call dia. Sewel sungguh!!!)

In total, from the 10th until 21st, he left me 33 text messages, majority asking me to call him back and 66 missed call recorded by Vodafone from his mobile. And this is supposed to be my school friend yang kunun nya nak menyambung sillaturrahim?

I gathered from my mobile messaging service that he actually stop calling on the 22nd, the day he heard from that Pilot man yang I masa tu dah macam nak mampos berpoya-poya kat KL. Ciss..orang jantan ni takleh lah nak simpan rahsia. Especially bila info yang mintak dirahsiakan tu berguna untuk puak-puak dia. I was just being polite, telephone lah si Mamat pilot ni nak wish Selamat Hari Raya. And the pilot, being a good friend that he is to JT, terus gi bagitau si kawan dia yang tak reti bahasa tu. Lucky I tak bagitau si Pilot ni bila I balik London, mau nya si Tembam tu duduk bersila tunggu I depan arrival hall kan?

Nevertheless, I arrived safely at Heathrow with the immigration, as usual menanya soklan-soklan yang tak perlu walaupun VISA dah terang benderang depan mata.Alhamdulillah, lepas kuih-kuih raya ku masuk kat green lane custom tu. Yang sakit nya, 21 keping Wii game versi lanun yang I bawak balik tu, semuanya takleh pakai, tak multi region kaedah nya. Seharian I search kat internet to see if any Nintendo UK outlet offers any modchip installation. Haram....satu pun takde. Camno kita nak main game ni, Hjh Eton woiiiiiii??????

The Malay Ramblings

Exhibit Penyakit Hati A, Murtabak Ayam...sila tengok tanpa kelip-kelip

Exhibit Penyakit Hati B, Sila makan hati dengan serta merta, From Lto R, kacang rebus, kuih keria, popiah basah, lemang original & Ketupat Palas, untuk tatapan mangsa-mangsa kebuluruan di Eire & East Anglia.

Seeing new development around TTDI made me sad. I am so used to the green scenery after MOFAZ office. With so many new Damansara’s, pelangi lah, mutiara lah, the old TTDI look too modern for my liking. Lucky my father has now moved to United States of 9, so TTDI can expand sampai dia meletup.It is unrecognisable.

Syukur alhamdulillah, I have eaten everything that I was cravings for. From Roti Jala to Popiah Basah and the claypot rice. And Murtabak too, thanks to Jen. Sakit jugak kepala bila mengenang nak drive all the way from Subang Jaya to Taman Melawati (Sue Typhoon tip off) in search for Murtabak. But I bet Taman Melawati is not what it used to be 20 years ago. I wonder if that MELAWATI atas bukit signboard is still there?

I have packed my luggage, the first one. I have another one (we brought two, MB’s is now filled with foods) and mine will be with our clothing’s. I have been busy running my own errands and neglecting my family, my mother especially but I have made a promise to myself that I will be coming back more often, like every raya.

To you yang I tak sempat nak jumpa, believe me I have every intention nak jumpa but my time is needed somewhere else. I got bad tooth ache and my mother is kind enough to set me an appoinment with my dentist cousin (also lama tak jumpa, bila sakit baru ingat sedara kan?) to get it fixed, besok pulak tu. Habislah plan nak skodeng Anuar Zain kat KLCC dengan pompuan-pompuan glamer besok.Sorry ah? To pompuan KWSP yang sungguh tak berhemah asking me to surrender my nationality just because of my request to withdraw my puny amount of caruman, semoga tuhan lah yang membalas budi bahasa akak yang tak banyak mana tu.Tapi musykil la, tu kan duit saya kak? Ciss...takpe, ada ubi ada batas, satu hari nanti, merasalah kereta akak rosak pastu akak kena naik bas, boleh? To the bank officer AM Bank (nama bank pun tak glamour) yang macam nak tak nak layan I semalam dan siang tadi, ingatlah...you tak akan mati sakit gigi if you smile to your customer.

The thing is, I am so used to people in the government offices in the UK or their commercial industry servants to treats their consumer indiscriminately, greets you and apologise profusely if they can’t attend to your needs. I remember having to go to Richmond Council to get my council tax refunded and the officer is mega busy but still acknowledges me and promise to get right back to me once he disengage from his commitment. That akak KWSP, boleh bergurau senda with her office mate while we (me and MB) duduk depan dia, waited almost 5 minutes for her to be ‘disconnected’ from her happy moment.Tak mintak maaf pun. Senyum pun takde. We are like at her mercy. For once, I want to give her the benefit of being a Muslim (this kakak wear tudung, sure lah alim sikit from I ni) so, as a woman, takleh lah kan tak tergedik-gedik over friendly at the counter layan pelanggan. But, kitorang ni dua-dua pompuan kak, senyum pun takdelah masuk neraka nya.

Another thing, sekarang ni adalah pulak cerita dua celebrity bergaduhan dalam TV. This Azwan Ali guy, I last remember him looking ‘boleh lah’ but now, he is either mega ugly with bedak sekati and that goggle eyewear and converse like pondan tak cukup umur (ish..sorrylah...I have nothing against gay man, but he is just one disgusting case) or just dah gila. Some years ago, if I am not mistaken, he sued TV3 and Ogy for making fun of his feeling...emm, for someone educated, he is so lembik to ambik hati like that. Now pulak, I saw him on telly semalam ke or that day, he announced that he will not forgive the pompuan who kunun nya slandered him.Aii...cakap macam tu pun nak masuk TV ke? And the TV people pun, why they nak layan that ‘sensasi’ issue, macam lah takde sensasi thing yang lain nak tunjuk. I also read the interview they did with Siti Nurhaliza, ada ka pi tanya, Siti dah berbaik ke dengan your husband ex wife? Weihhh...rasa macam nak cari pulak if there are any articles in the Hello ke, NOW ke kalau-kalau ada article Jennifer Aniston berbaik-baik dengan Esah Jolie, eh Angelina Jolie.

I nak kutuk banyak-banyak pun, I am still a malay, pakai la Fair & Lovely banyak mana pun, my skin will still chocolate colour gitu (lainlah if I sleep in that Michael Jackson’s capsule kan?) My mentality is if not worse is still the same, suka mengutuk orang. So, I can only moan, moan and moan for you all to read.

I’ll be flying back to London soon and will not have time to update my blog as this laptop will be seating beautifully in his sarung. I’m going back to US of 9 tomorrow without my laptop and will go to KLIA direct from there.

To all especially Bella and Cik Kiah, thank you. To Yanz, panjang umur, kita akan jumpa jugak. To CD Kak Melah, akan ku cari jua di Seremban. To Jen, what can I say, thank you seems so little. To Stephen & Lizs, terimak kasihhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh kitakkkkkk.....kitak duak nang bagus gilak.

Best Wishes.

Murtabak Update

Semalam I pergi pasar malam you all. Taktau la apasal, tapi hati macam nak makan murtabak, not ordinary murtabak but the murtabak that is only available at pasar malam. So, my sister pun hangkutlah I gi satu pasar malam (tu pun kena tip off by her friend) kat area Seremban ni. Punyalah happy hati I nampak pasar malam. Mata terus lapar, I bought so many kuih yang susah nak jumpa kat UK bit by bit untuk di share dengan MB yang bakal ku visit tengah malam nanti (by the time I posted this, I am already at MB's house)

Masuk aje pasar malam, dengan senyum yang macam kambing gatal, I went searching for murtabak.Dalam hati dah kata, I will hambik gambar that murtabak untuk ku tayang kat orang yang gersang murtabak (Makji Eton & Mak Leemah)

Tu lah, niat dalam hati dah tak betul kan? Jalan punya jlan, cari punya cari, tak adapun murtabak. Yang jumpanya apam balik aje.Sedeyyy I tau.

Moral dari cerita saya ni, jauhkan lah diri sendiri dari hati busuk.

Sekian

Satu Hari Di Hari Open House...

Cik Kosui dengan Cik Jeniffer Lopez ni apasal nyebok kat sini ni?

Eh, apasal Burger Ramly Ayam Special enterframe lak ni? (Gambar Hiasan)

Aku telah kembali ke kampung halamanku 3 days ago. At the risk of sounding like Tenggang, I really mati kematu kat sini.I have no one to talk to. My nieces and nephew still see me as a foreign props dalam rumah.The phone line is so bad that I cannot use the dial up (mana tak nya, ada cross line and I can hear some pakcik-pakcik mengumpat) The TV, hish...the astro, the NTV7, the RTM’s and few more channels consequently repeat their program tak habis-habis. I swear that I have come across Kwek Mambo Anita berbelas kali, Cit Cat beratus kali and all the drama’s....bila budak-budak kecik dah tidur, barulah boleh tengok CSI, tu pun yang dah ditayang kat UK 6 bulan lepas....makkkk!!!!!

But the advantage is always food. Bangun pagi, dah ada roti canai atas meja.My mother’s helper, Bibik by 12noon, dah start ambik order, mau makan apa? Since I balik, I have eaten rice countless time. My abdomen memang dah terburai and I am missing LA Fitness badly. The worst part, my mother tak kasi I bawak balik Diet coke, takut sikecik-kecik tu semuanya nak minum, and it is bad for them. And 3 hari jugaklah, I kurengg minum air, mana taknya aku berberak batu?

When my sister arrived from Shah Alam yesterday,I insisted that she drive me out to town. I told her that I am bored, really bored that I can kill someone just for fun (bongkak tak?) She in return, have better idea.Diajaknya I pergi open house rumah my relative yang I dah tak pernah jumpa since I was 6 years old. Well, again bukan nak tunjuk sombong, I am very selective nak pergi-pergi rumah orang ni.Bukan apa, I ni bangsa tak bercakap. I will only go places that I know I’ll be behaving normally.How can you be over friendly with relatives yang you jenjarang jumpa? God knows my parents agaknya tengah-tengah malam secretly buat sembahyang hajat with hope that Allah boleh turunkan rahmat, tukar sikit perangai anak dia yang macam sakai laut ni.My aunty lives next door. I have been in Malaysia for over a week now, but belum sekalipun I jalan beraya rumah dia. My mother keep getting messages from her to ask me to call over, datang makan tapai ke hapa. Apa? Makan tapai? Jokingly (well, I don’t joke...tapi tak nak nampak kurang ajar sangat, I memain jugak la) I told my mother, that I will only come if dia buat roti jala. I bet 20 years ago, if I were to answer her like that, she will then start bersyarah, kalau kau tak campur orang, kau kahwin nanti, orang tak nak datang.....but knowing me, I also have answer for that, baguslah kalau orang tak datang kan, takde habis duit nak beli beras ke, hapa ke....

Since we only see each other, every 5 years, of if lucky, every 2 years, my mother, like ibu sejati with heaven under her tapak kaki, have opted to remain calm and collected and understanding, even bila I tidur sampai pukul 9 pagi pun. Seeing her like that (my mother is now nursing my sick father) made me insaf and I try to give her what she wants.She never rest.I would have given up (especially bila ingat-ingatkan yang laki dah la perangai cam puaka) Ibu Mithali tu mak aku....

In the end, with no other better offer,I agree to raya rumah my relative ni. My sister told me that he is now a famous singer (takde la famous mana nya pun) and recently married anak VIP jugak. Okay lah, he also anak VIP. I can’t remember the last time I saw him, because his family lives in Subang Jaya, and because his bapak is so rich, he goes to private college rather than menadah muka kat sekolah MARA macam I ni.

We went to his mother's house. I have to introduced myself to them, maklumlah, dah lama tak jumpa, muka masing-masing pun dah lain. Me and my sister is so convinced that mak dia cucuk botox or tak pun, pakai susuk. Mulut!!!! Disebabkan ramai orang, me and this famous relative of mine, cakap pun setakat hi and bye, but it is so obvious that he have a little bit of interest nak bercakap-cakap dengan I ni (so is everyone else) because I live in London. Wehh..kalau I duduk Puncak Alam or Kampung Melayu Subang you all tak nak cakap-cakap ke? Me and my sister then kena introduced to many glamour-glamour people. My sister keep whispering..Hey..that one is sipolan, this one is sipolan. I pun macam orang bingung...I don’t know anyone but I know, their open house got satay. So, I am not interested to suaikenal with this so called ‘famous amous people’ and quickly adjourned to makan satay.

Watching Malay drama (ada jugak yang best nya tau) making me very menyampah to certain actor/actresses. Ada yang scene dalam kampung, tapi mekap tebal cam Makhayyam Fiona (siapakah itu?) muka putih, leher gelap...where got orang kampung wear mekap like that? The male actor, with one line of dialogue, tapi ada 2,3 facial expression pastu hayun-hayun tangan cam orang jual ubat. Very the tak jadi, tau?

This scene is very the kelakar one, one female ‘artiste’ ni, seat next to me masa makan. Well, I must give her credit for her friendliness walaupun ada ala-ala terpaksa gitu. She must have heard that I lived in the UK, and she friendly asked ‘ What do you do for life?’ Ermmm....nasib baik I paham, but my sister yang jahat tu keep raising her eyebrow, signaling yang dia pun rasa nak gelak. I pun jawabla pertanyaan dia (telling her what I do for a living, entah dia paham ke tidak agaknya, maklum lah kerjaya I tak le glamour macam kau kan, Kiah?) and I asked her back, ‘What do you do?’ ‘I’m an artiste’. (She could have said ‘I’m an actress aje, sebab my sister kata dia ni berlakon aje kerjanya.) She then started talking about her career, of which sangatlah tak interesting nya. I think she sensed that I don’t know much, and she start lah membebel about the industry. Me and my sister was just listening and looking at her, as we all pun tak tau apa-apa, apart from my sister bayar her monthly Astro subscription aje. Agaknya, after she realised yang dia je dah bercakap-cakap berejam lamanya, she politely invite me back into talking by asking ‘ London tu jauh tak?’ Eh..kau apahal, tapi berdum dam cakap cam international actress pastu tanya, London jauh ke tidak? Ish...bak kata my sister, janganlah kutuk dia, maybe she genuinely tak tau.But I can't stop laughing til today.

Hahahahahahhahahhahahahahahahahahah.....

Update

Ni yang benerrr inihh. Aku diraba Indon you all. Macam cilako!!! Punyalah I ni menitik beratkan hal-hal health and safety, tup-tup, waduhhh.....diperkosari Indon.Cesss!!! Begini ceritanya, tu lah dia kan, ada kereta tapi nak naik rapid KL. But honestly, I rather not drive here. Yesterday, after balik dari kubur and melantak sessi pagi, kat jalan nak masuk Subang Jaya from Fed.Highway tu (alaa..yang dekat KFC tu la...tapi KFC nya dah kemana, Makji tatau la) I was driving on the left lane, kira tak laju lah ni macam orang yang balik Johor tu yang drive macam minah rempit versi naik kereta, siapa tu, Manal? Tiba-tiba, adalah satu people carrier ni terus menyelit from left. I was in total shock, thinking that if only I was a bit faster, musti sama-sama berdentum.Seperti biasa I with my over dramatises imagination, dah la baru balik dari kubur (at the same time, pi visit kubur my senior and junior who both perished in road accident) kang ada pulak yang akan dihantar masuk kubur. Habislaaaa..siapalah lagi akan diharapkan mencari CD Kak Melah bersora kering tu kan, Lee? Habis dalam ½ jam jugaklah I trauma, dek terkenang-kenang my near miss tu.Speaking of kubur and mati accident, aruah senior I kat MRSM and aruah junior I kat PPP ni, dah lebih 10 years passed away. After how many years, barulah dapat ziarah aruah Nini and Nai. Semoga tenanglah hendaknya.Meh la you all, sedekah fatihah...

I keep seeing this RapidKL bus everywhere, so I talked MB into getting on one. Macam cantik aje, ala-ala bus kat London. Cepat jugak bus tu, takdelah macam bus METRO yang macam lahabau yang selalu berhenti tunggu sedara-mara dia naik tu, harus berejam nak sampai KL.So, MB pun ikutlah, lagipun, bukan ke I nak gi dating dengan Bella & Kiah, so I dah buat plan siang-siang nak goda suruh Kiah hantar balik, which Kiah obliged dengan penuh kasih sayang. I was enjoying the sight of Subang Jaya and Sunway Lagoon area, tiba-tiba I rasa macam ada lipas merayap kat my right arm.Puas jugak I wonder, ada ke serangga dalam bus yang secanggih ini? Well, you never know kan, kalau serangga aje tak apalah, buatnya ular menjalar from tingkap bas nak masuk dalam baju, macam mana? Speaking of which, banyak betul forest developement kat area Subang Jaya yang dua puluh tahun dahulu ialah area pokok kelapa sawit. I keep thinking, kat manalah ular-ular dalam palm oil farm tu nak re habitate? Haruslah tumpang tidur dalam bus RapidKL kan? Ceh...I told you already, my imagination cam sial one...

Cari-punya cari punya pencabulan hak asasi tu, I saw bunch of fingers clasping onto the side of my seat, siap bercincin batu besar nya, twitching about.Sah, itulah yang menjadi ularnya. I was struggling with what to do. I nak cakap dengan MB yang tengah tidur tu (dia ni suka tidur dalam moving vehicle) kang orang dengar pulak. Knowing MB, will always come up with jawapan yang lagi akan menyakitkan hati like ‘Eh, what do you expect, kalau naik bas kedak ya lah..diraba, semua ya cheap skate, kita ni bukannya naik 5 star limousine’. Lebih baik takyah mengadu. Still wanting to give that Mat Indon benefit of the doubt, manalah tau, ada orang kan bangsa tangan takleh duduk diam...I just reposition my seating so that takleh lah kena kat jari dia tu. I was at peace for a while, until Asia Jaya, of course, bila takde gangguan tu, I pun repostion my seating back to normal. Sampai aje Asia Jaya, maka ular-ular kecik ni pun menggangu lagi. That guy must have notice that I dah tau yang dia ni cuba mencabuli diriku, so apa lagi, bila orang tak layan, berhentilah kan? But, I keep having in mind about what was told to me by my sisters where la ni, berhati-hati sikit bila jalan sensorang, because Mat Mat Indon ni sekarang dah pandai pakai calit-calit or sembur baca-baca kat your face that can make you jadi syok kan dia (eeeee....tak kuasa aku) So, for that reason lah, I tak berani nak buat apa-apa.If I confront him, he will then ‘sembur’ me, maka, balik ke Jogjakarta lah aku kan? So better not, nak raba sangat, raba lah.It’s only arm pun.Tapi, hati tetap sakit. Kalau yang meraba tu Anuar Zain, jangankan lengan, kaki tangan, badan pun ku kasi free.

Bila that guy, keluar request stop kat KL Sentral, barulah I bagitau MB. MB tanya, nya raba kau kedak ne? Aku pun demonstrate la, with a little words and more action, kononnya tak nak bagi orang tau, but my presentation attracted few eyes and dah sah-sah they all tau yang I ni dah jadi mangsa pencabulan. Buat malu aje....(but I wonder, macam mana they all boleh tau...hmmm...only the victim can tell another victim ke?

But, we really had fun that day.The details of my lunch date takyah lah nak cerita pasalnya Bella dengan Kiah pun dah cerita. The food was delicious, coffee, food, coffee again, fruits, chocolate cake and ENO. ENO? Kenapa and siapa yang gersang nasik sampai kena makan ENO? Kalau lah tak kerana Kiah nak balik cepat sebab takut kat laki (ye ke laki kau garang, or kau sesaja nak balik cepat sebab nak pulun coklat and try seluar dalam baru?)

To Bella, kami nak mintak mahap la ye...punya lahap nak makan, lupa pulak yang you takleh makan udang, tapi, sila salahkan si Kiah ye, dia yang order.I can’t wait for another convention...perjanjian syaitan nya next week. Maklumlah, nak kena tunggu sorang careerwoman escape dari tempat kerojenya. What’s next? DO ME ke? Lepas makan, boleh tak kita minum kopi kat tempat yang you all kata ada Anuar Zain tu?

Misi seterusnya ialah, mencari Kak Melah. Dimanokah ekau, Kak Melah oii? Kat KLCC takde, kat Carrefour takde...kenalah I pergi balik kat tempat memula I jumpa Kak Melah...kat Rock Corner, Subang Parade tu.I ni, puas digelakkan dek orang because sibuk nak carik Kak Melah.Tapi takpe, demi kasih sayang kat kengkawan ku yang sorang ni (blog you I dah lama tak buka la...pasalnya line tak clear, that day nak terkantoi I tau, anak buah I sikit lagi nak nampak) akan ku jejaki jua Kak Melah yang dah tua tu.

Best wishes,

Makji Esah

Intermission....Promosi Penting

Nantikan...persembahan teater muzikal 'Aku Diraba Didalam Bas Rapid KL' di kompleks kebudayaan Dato' Siamang Gagap, Seremban Negeri Sembilan.

Untuk pertanyaan tiket bayar, tiket free atau sneak preview, sila hubungi Cik Melah Ram di kakmelahliplapsorakering@yahoo.com ataupun nantikan update selepas Makji Esah balik dari membeli Burger Ramly kat USJ 14. Sekian.

Untuk Kengkawanku Yang Amat Dicingtahi...

Nasi Lemak & Mee Rebus For Breakfast

Nasi Lemak Jual Dibawah Pohon Bambu ($2.00 aje....daun pisang lagi..kau ado?)

Kepada adinda dan kekanda ku (Makji Eton & Hjh Leemah) yang berada diperantauan, terimalah gambar-gambar yang menyayat hati ini. Wasalam.

Daripada saya yang tengah berjoli katak tanpa batasan di Malaysia,
Hjh Esah

Raya Update (Jalan- Jalan Di KL)

Demi memenuhi hajat kengkawan dan juga hasrat diri sendiri, maka Makji Esah dengan semangat kereta waja nya (pehal nama kereta Waja ye?) turun ke KL hari ni. Hajat dihati macam nak naik RapidKL but memandangkan segerombolan lagi orang nak ngikut, maka I dengan MB pun kenalah naik kereta. Berbekalkan memory ingat-ingat lupa jalan-jalan kat KL,maka we all pun drive lah dari Subang Jaya ke KL. Nasib baik tak tersesat sampai Sungai Buloh ke hapa ke, kiranya, pandai jugaklah aku ni jadi sattelite navigator.

Destinasi pertama ialah KWSP di Jalan Timur/Barat (?) Apahal gi KWSP kan? Hehehe...adalah plan nya.I was told that any Malaysian with intention to migrate, boleh withdraw semua duit KWSP. It was so canggih that I can get my statement printed through the kiosk, takyah amik nombor beratur bagai.Banyak duit ku tau, Hjh Leemah. Kau ado duit EPF? Ado? Well, sebenarnya, disamping balik raya, we all pun ada plan-plan tersembunyi sikit. I went and ask this kakak tudung that insist on skeaping English walaupun I bercakap melayu dengan dia, ala-ala Noraini Jane. The kakak KWSP tudung said, I can withdraw all if I want to migrate but with condition, I kena surrender my Mykad. Haiyooo....mula-mula ingat nak go ahead aje, but bila pikir-pikir balik, kalau surrender Mykad, nanti passport mati, nak renew cemana kan? But still, I’m allowed to withdraw money from account 2 yang sebanyak taik hidung tu.Hmmmm.....kena bermesyuarah ni.

Second destination ialah Ampang Park. Ini adalah atas arahan my friend si Tyra Banks tu (bukan nama sebenar) yang mintak dibelikan Office Window Vista versi lanun. Pehal Cik Tyra Banks kita yang dah kayo tapi masih nak pakai software lanun ni, taklah Makji Esah tau. I pulak macam orang bangang gi approach all the VCD seller tanya ‘Ey, lu ada jual XXXX pirate punya ka?’. After few people ku tanya and tak berjaya, I asked MB yang sungguh bagus PR nya tu gi cari pulak. Berbekalkan direction yang dibagi oleh sorang amoi jual VCD haram ni, dapat lah kami cari kedai computer ni. I went in and asked if they sell that software and this guy dengan confidentnya tanya kat we all, you nak yang original ke yang copy punya. Waduhhh....I pun jawab lah, ‘wouldn’t I be in trouble if I asked for the counterfeit copy?’ (sesambil buat-buat muka innocent) That guy dengan gentleman nya cakaplah ‘I don’t condone the piracy but I can show you the place where you can get the pirate software’. Cehhh....maka selepas itu, masuklah kami ke kedai apek ni yang dipenuhi segala software-moftware haram ittew. Hah..pueh ati kau, Tyra Banks?

Bila dah lapar, we all teragaklah nak makan kat Burit Ombak....ish..Bora Ombak. I remember coming here 2 years ago but MB’s sisters teringin nak pergi and since we all dah ada kat Jalan Ampang yang gampang tu, maka kami pun teruslah pergi ketempat yang kononnya dipenuhi oleh celebrity tu (ada ka Sila Majit makan mee kolok di sia?) Ptuihhh.....tutup pulak tu. We returned back to Ampang Park and makan kat this very small cafe yang jual Chee Chong Fun yang sedap tu. (But in the end, sampai la jugak hajat kakak-kakak MB nak makan di Bora Ombak yang banyak nyamuk tu. We went there for dinner)

At this point, I can no longer be in a car. Driving in KL nowadays is worst than driving in Central London, in fact, Central London is far more better with no mat-mat motor yang tah dari mana datang tetiba main muncul aje pastu, menyelit-nyelit dengan sesuka ati atuk dia. We travelled to KL Sentral and Central market via the PUTRA and alhamdulillah, segala barang yang dikirim oleh kengkawan yang kegersangan kuih raya dah dibeli. So Tyra Banks and Nuri (nama sebenar) kuih-kuih kiriman you all dah ku borong. Tyra Banks, kitak sik mauk kuih batang buruk ke?

Knowing me, I can’t help to noticed segala benda-benda yang tak berkenan dihati and dibulan yang mulia ni masih jugak nak mengutuk. I observed a few occurence yang tak perlu and how I wish, after all these years things will change.Many things has changed, too many, from roads to buildings. Malaysians are capable in altering plenty things, and if only they can alter themselves (their mentality) to a better.

a) I was at KL Sentral MAS office to book my seat back home (tak nak lah kena himpit dengan orang-orang jakun lagi kan?) while we were served politely by a nice lady called Vijaya (promote, jgn tak promote) ada pulak Pakcik Pek ni, terjerit-jerit kat counter sebelah. Well, if I’m in his shoes, haruslah nak marah-marah kalau dapat false info over the phone. MAS are very good at misleading people over the phone tau? But for him to abuse that poor counter girl sungguhlah tak perlu. His attitude reminds me of my inflight incident where I was verbally abused by some jahanam yang tak sedar diri. Marah satu cerita, kena menegking-nengking ke? Speaking of which, why are we Malaysian still tolerate this kind of behaviour? No one should be abuse in their workplace, and that Pakcik Pek, should be removed rather than be allowed to air his grievances macam orang jual ubat kat dalam MAS office tu. Cubalah buat macam tu kat Council office ke, Royal Mail ke, haruslah kau kena remove dengan security kan?

b) PUTRA under/overground. Sungguhlah canggihnya and thanks, for the airconditioning. Tapi, kenapa orang dalam tak dibagi keluar dulu hah? Kenapa semuanya nak masuk train macam anak-anak kambing Mary? Lagi satu, bila orang nak keluar, yang berdiri-berdiri tu patut make way lah kan, nak bagi orang-orang senang keluar. Ni tak, terpacak macam Shah Rukh Khan tak jadi.MB was almost terperangkap dalam train because she can’t come out on time.Ikut ati nak aje I jerit kat Shah Rukh Khan tak jadi tu, ‘Weiii...PODAHHHH’. By the way, is the word PODAHHH means ‘lalu sikit/tepi sikit’ in tamil? Tak pun ‘Gi mampus kau’ boleh ke?

Well, akhirnya, selepas puas mengembara KL (never again with car, ptuihhh) we safely arrived Subang Jaya at 8pm. Masa ni lah nak mengacau bini-bini orang. Bini orang nombor satu, bila ditelefon, tengah tengok ‘Desperate Housewife’. Ish..so telling kan? Puas ku goda ajak jumpa, takut laki katanya, nak gi raya rumah in laws. Ciss...tapi hati meronta nak berkhalwat dengan I kan?

Bini orang nombor 2, well tengah tidur dek demam kata laki nya. It was after a while that I realised that I tak acknowledge pun laki dia masa ku telephone. Kurang ajar betul. But I did call back and berborak lah aku dengan laki orang tu (yang suara desperate cam nak berak bunyi nya)

Ni nak tanya, apasal hari-hari ada cerita hantu kat TV la ni? Hantu Pokok Pisang la, Hantu Jeruk Perut la, Pontianak Sundal la....and pastu, budak-budak Academy Fantasia tu tak sudah-sudah ke nak buat concert? Bosannnnnnn tau.

Update

Raya kedua today. Like anak tak mengenang budi, I choose to make myself scarce away from home and sought refuge at my sister’s house in Subang Jaya. I told my mother that I got berlambak open house to go to, and I need to go as the open houses are my friend’s yang kalau tak pergi ‘nanti kengkawan kecik ati’. Cehh...macamlah banyak kengkawan. The real fact is I’m so bored. My sister (the one that I talk to most of the time) is following her hubby to jalan to rumah mak mertua and she and her lot will be out of coverage for couple of days. My younger brother a.k.a. my supir whom service is no longer required as he langgar red light on our way to pasar malam that malam raya (nasib baik aku tak mati, tau?) is far too busy with his friends plus we are not on speaking terms after his attempt to get me killed in road accident (drama nya I) thus tanpa service nya, tak keluar rumah lah aku plus I really got sick of my cousins, aunties and tah sesapa lagi sedara mara yang tak habis-habis gigih nak melacurkan I dipagi-pagi raya tu dengan segala mat-mat bujangan,dudaan dalam kampung tu.

Yes you all, since malam raya and pagi raya, I kept on getting introduced to Din lah, Mat Zain lah, Fadil lah, Razali lah from my relatives.Dalam pada datang rumah I bertakbir boleh lagi buat continuity appointment nak datang raya besok. My relatives are really treating me like The Memoir Of Geisha and introduced me to at least 6 jantan sekaligus.One of the guy was even so daring to tegur I in front of my father on our way to kubur.Haiyooo....lucky we all in a raya mood kalau tak, I’m sure that guy will become the latest ahli kubur, if I decided to tell my father that he is ‘stalking’ me from last night. Now, I’m a drama queen!!!

Believe me, this guys are all not so bad looking. I even go to same school (sekolah rendah) with one of them. But apa lah masalahnya some still membujang and kena reject dipertengahan jalan, tak tau la. Believe me, although the age different is not that great, I look like a schoolgirl compare to them. Suddenly all men my age dah berupa macam bapak orang la ni. Why eh? Tak cemburu ke they all nengok Anuar Zain yang makin hari makin hensem tu?

Nak dijadikan cerita, all 6 came to my parents house (perlu diingat...ni they all masing-masing datang different time tau) that pagi raya and like anak dara sunti (sunti hapa....suntuk la ni) me and my younger sister do the hidang air, replenish foods and let the orang tua melayan the jejantans. Padan muka kau, kan? Nak benar datang rumah, sah sah my parents tau I ni takde kawan, they just thought this jantans are budak-budak kampung anak their neighbours. By 5pm, all my relatives were calling me asking for feedback of their proposed calon. ‘Ey, ekau bekonan tak? Kau goma tak budak tu?’ Yikssss...

In the end, I only entertain 1 out of 6. Just because this guy satu sekolah rendah dengan I. Nothing romantic as we all pun dah kenal each other since we darjah satu and he can’t do much because I know about his sejarah silam kencing dalam seluar. But we had a good laugh and he was the one who drove me to Subang Jaya today. Pandai tak aku mengambik kesempatan, Kiah?

We were joking about how his kakak ipar (my relative yang berbau-bau taik kambing tu) keep promoting me to him, unbeknown to him that the girl that she was campaigning about was me. I asked him why he is still single (after telling him that my reason of still being single is just ‘tak laku’) he just keeps mumble tak jumpa yang sesuai lah, takde masa lah, sibuk kerja lah...(ye lah tu) I secretly suspect that he is a closeted case. Active betul gaydar ku.Somehow, I can tell whose metro sexual and who’s homosexual. Cabul benar mulutku, kesian mamat ni.

He offered himself as my supir (I told him about my brother) and gave me his mobile phone number. He dropped me off (I tak ajak dia singgah pun, takut my sister gi cakap pulak kat orang yang aku naik kereta dengan dia...hah...gossip sekampung kan?) and we promised to see each other soon. He asked me again, why am I still single. Seperti biasa, ala-ala Mrs Marple nya aku ni, jawablah ‘same reason as you’.

What ever that is.

P/s Lisz, terimak kasih ya, merik tauk kamek suruh nangga cerita Sila Majit ya raya petama. Kamek sukkk gilak. Nya nang kacak, bah.Kenak anak duak yang tua rupa kedak bapak sik kacak ya..haiyoo.

Selamat Hari Raya

I safely arrived KLIA on Wednesday. With MAS. It was delayed for 2 hours and according to the pilot because it was due to the heavy traffic at Heathrow but what was obvious is that it was too many people with too heavy luggage and it took me almost an hour queuing with the people at the checking in desk keep having to unload/off load their heavy bag. So kesian, but they only have themselves to blame. Dah tau luggage allowance ada 20kg, yang gi bawak barang sampai 40 kilo, siapa yang suruh? People usually resent on paying for extra baggage charges as it might be equivalent as paying for another fare home. Nak tak nak, kenalah adjust, bawak keluar itu, bawak keluar ini kan?

I have this check list of things to do before leaving for KL, and macam biasa, list will still be a list, implementation takde. I was working on the day that I was due flying and only started looking for clothes to pack at 4pm, knowing that I had to be at the airport at 6pm. Ni lah baru namanya frequent traveller, Kiah. Hari ni nak fly, hari ni baru nak mampus nak pack baju seluar dalam bagai.

To all my friends, Bella, Kiah,Lee, Makji Eton, Aizee and Sarafina, haiyoo...I do have to apologise.Tah hapa penyakitnya sekarang ni Royal Mail buat strike tak habis-habis, my Eid card with intent to send to you all dah kena return. Yang menyakitkan hati, Makji Eton, I dah bungkus bagi hadiah to cheer you up sempena hari-hari raya ni, tapi Post Office boleh direjectnya parcel ku, boleh? Tunggulah ye, maybe lepas raya or quite rightly lepas Royal Mail strike ni sampailah ye.

My journey with MAS was an unpleasant one. First, I was abused by this man who decided to behave like a 12 years old boy. Nak dijadikan cerita, I think it was past midnight and I think I was somewhere between the English Channel dengan Italy/France and was dozing off.Tetiba terasa macam ada benda pressing hard on my knees that was unusually positioned (they’re on top of each other) and I saw this person in front of me reclining his/her seat very, very low.Dah la kaki I panjang, I can’t move my legs. I had to ask MB to approach the passing steward to ask the person infont of me to adjust their seat. Si steward ni boleh cakap ‘saya takleh buat apa-apa, Kak’.

Certain people ada habit yang bila dah naik economy class tu tapi nak behave macam naik business class. Dah tau tempat duduk kecik, considerlah orang depan belakang, kan? I had to ask the person in front of me to adjust her seat, tapi they all buat tak layan and I had no choice but to manually adjust/release my legs and of course, the impact to the front seat was significant.Tiba-tiba muncul lah sijantan ni.He must be kneeling on his seat and asking me what is my problem. I said to him, I had to move my legs as they reclined their seat lower till it presses against it. This guy dengan accent kandang babi nya, teruslah cakap kalau I tak suka dia recline seat dia, I boleh duduk tempat lain, things like who said we can’t recline our seat semua jadah keluar dari mulut dia. I cakap balik, I’m not saying you can’t, I am asking you to be considerate, I’m having problem here. He just went, ‘Is your leg 8 foot?’ As I was explaining, he keeps cutting me off until I had to say ‘can you let me finish’. Akin to a bully, he just ‘No!!! You listen to me!!!’ Knowing that this type of people, maka buang masalah kalau nak layan pun, I terus cakap ‘Well, I’m going to stop talking to you now, but I am not responsible if you’re uncomfortable as I will be moving my leg as and when I like’. He keeps on blabbering and I just tell him ‘Stop talking to me and why don’t you just piss off back to your seat’. He just stood there keep staring at me macam kaki bully tak cukup umur. I am so close to remark on his babi-face look but nanti jadi racial discrimination pulak so what I can do is to be as sarcastic as I can by telling him ‘Are you going to keep doing that for the next 13 hours? Suit yourself’. I terus makan kacang and that ugly looking pug nose guy terus duduk all the way KLIA with his reclined seat.

What upsets me is that the cabin crew did nothing to stop the altercation. As it is I felt so bad have to argue and disturbed people peace but the crew did not take any notice and I bet, kalau lah I ni Mak Gagak with a burly beefy boyfriend, mau mati kot kena tumbuk jantan tu. I keep telling myself; never again with MAS.The fare was exorbitantly expensive with a crap service and lap kaki food. I die to find out siapalah head of the cabin crew recruitment. The crew are not well groomed with faces all full of zits. Lainlah kalau I dapat free ticket ke, I should have stick to the unpretentious Emirates, biarlah stopover lelama pun kat Dubai. How on earth MAS boleh dapat best cabin crew award pun tak tau lah. Maybe they’re nicer to the foreigner and first class people. So discriminating.

I had so much fun today, beli baju raya at Subang Parade. It was so cheap and nice. I was struggling to combat my sleepiness, menguap sana menguap sini.We went to Giant to beli barang for raya and at the check out counter, masa bayar, MB was told that her credit card was declined. I doubt that happen and I suruh MB tanya that young man if the card requires a pin. That man cakap ‘Aah lah, dia mintak pin number’. I look at MB and sighed over the sombong-bodohness of them. Tak tau, tanyalah kan. Kata nak promote year 2007 visit Malaysia, haruslah foreign card sekarang dah pakai chip and pin. Ni tak, terus cakap declined padahal tak decline pon. Sakit hati tau....

Kiah, lupa nak cakap dengan you tadi, tak kedai CD mana yang kau pergi, aku dengan senang-senang nya boleh jumpa cd ‘FREEDOM’ yang kononnya kau satu Malaya susah nak cari tu. I saw ‘RAMLAH RAM’ as well, terus ingat kat Lee. Lee, kalau you all nak, cakaplah ye. Greatest collection tu.

To all, thanks for the raya wishes. I am now in the United State of 9, having a quiet time with my family with a dial up internet connection. Wahhhh!!!!

Selamat Hari Raya to all of you who reads, from me and my family. Here I am, masih kuat mengomplen walaupun dah nak dekat habis puasa.

Update

Atas permintaan Cik Kiah (kau dah mandi ke belum, nah?) maka, terimalah update ku yang maha seciput ni.

My flight ticket arrived in the post 3 days ago.Syukurrrr....it was rather memeningkan kepala, since all my bank details masih pakai address lama and I pulak, masih la takde masa nak pergi telepon bank nak tukar address (tapi boleh lak berborak dengan JT, cemana tu?) Kerana ketidak-efficient-nan MB, maka we both have to pay extra £100 for this ticket, tapi...quoting MB 'elehhh..kita kan dah kaya' maka, kalau boleh, I dah tak mau ingat-ingat lagi that cheap ticket yang dah terlepas dek kemalasan MB nak respond email I.But looking at the bright side, this time we all dapat balik makek belun MAS, yang direct and takde stopover mana-mana.

Yes you all, after my Nandos date (walaupun tertipu) I dengan rela hati pergi minum kopi dengan silahabau tembam tu, last Monday. Apa hal, suka dating hari Isnin kan? For those who thought that we both re living drama hindustan during our last date at Nandos, as in, I walked away ala-ala sang girlfriend yang tengah mengamuk gila dengan pakwe nya, dengan lari meninggalkan JT kat meja makan sensorang, perlu diberitahu yang adegan ini tidaklah berlaku.Walaupun si JT masa tu tengah mengalami sawan babi yang kronik plus tak reti bahasanya yang aku ni nak balik pasal dah gelap, I am not THAT cruel to leave him there by himself.Plus, malu lah kan...nanti orang keliling kata apa pulak.Macam aku pulak yang bermasalah, padahal nak blah sangat pasal nak kejar tube.Although I told him that I need to run, I actually didn't . He must have read my body language that he decided to snap out of his wallowing-self-pity moment and we ended up walking out together from Nandos. It is so obvious to me that he is emotionally disturbed and with me walking out (konon nya lah) is going to crushed his self-esteem yang dah tak ada tu. Work experience taught me a lot about dealing with 'sensitive' soul ni. Hish...bila I kenang-kenang balik segala kes-kes serial killer or mentally induced murder case, maka tak usah lah nak buat drama dengan orang-orang cam ni.Plus, dia ni kan kawan sekolah I, apa-apa pun, sympathy misti ada kan, Kiah? Walaupun hati menyampah gitu. However, dalam taknak-taknak hurt his ego tu, sempat jugak I cakap kat dia 'K, you are really making me feel uncomfortable'.Haiyooo....JT masa tu pandang macam nak dicekiknya leher I.That managed to made him speechless dengan mata buntang nya and until the I reached the Underground Stn, we do not exchanged any words, maybe sebab dia terperanjat kot, yang aku pi bagitau kat dia yang aku sekarang dah rasa amatlah tak selesa.

JT didn't call me for a good 48 hours. Not that I'm counting but the freedom of not being 'harrassed' is so vivid that I am capable to remember berapa lama.I thought, okaylah...dah sakit ati lah tu, maka aman lah hidup ku pasni tanpa gangguan.But last Wednesday, he surprising rang. I was at F, macam biasa, masuk duty jaga sipatah kaki tu.We talked for 40 minutes and he was very apologetic.Maybe because I was restless that day that I can give him that time of the day or I was just turning into my psychobabble mood nak melayan si jantan-kronik-emosi ni.

Like a broken radio, JT dengan tanpa segan silunya start feeling sorry for himself, telling me how lonely he is and how he feels confortable in my company.Macam akauntan bertauliah jugak lah I dok remind him that we just met, although we have known each other long ago tapi masa tu, siapalah diri ni yang tak dipandang oleh jejaka hensem cam dia.(Padan lah muka kan...)

JT start asking about me, if I'm seeing someone...buta kah matanya? I never failed to wear my commitment band, buat-buat tak nampak kot?

'I'm with someone, we have been together for 6 years now'. 'You should have told me' 'Why?' 'You gave me hope' 'What sort of hope?' 'Ahhh...you don't understand'
'Yes, you're right, I don't understand'

We meet for coffee after this phone conversation. I was happy as Larry, ye lah.He must know where he stands with me now.Lepas dikatanya aku yang bagi dia harapan, harapan apa pun taktau la, JT asked to meet for coffee and me, knowing there is no longer an expectation, plus I kan suka minum kopi, terimalah invitation nya.But JT was as stressed out as ever.

Nantilah I update what we talked about during the coffee meet.

Update

I dapat dua tag dalam 3 hari dah tak ber blog ni. Puasa punya pasal, I didn't carry my laptop around (jugak pasal 2,3 hari hujan semanjang...pehal tak tau..Autumn dah start lah tu kan?) Semenjak puasa ni jugaklah, activity main ular kat tempat kerja rancak digugurkan sementara pasal taknak dapat dosa makan gaji buta. Ye lah tu...

Yang betulnya, tak update pasal penat. Penat kerja, penat puasa and penat jaga orang patah kaki yang semakin hari semakin menyakitkan hati. Tapi, dalam penat-penat, boleh lagi pergi buka puasa minum kopi dengan Jejaka (yang perasan dirinya) Idaman Malaya tu. Dalam pada kena jadik nurse, boleh lagi melayan Jejaka Tembam Idaman Malaya tu dalam telepon. Hish...apa ni, kata tak suka, layan bakpo?

Well, some men will say, if we be upfront (as in kalau tak suka, cakap aje) and then, they will get the gist. Well, some men. SOME MEN!!!

This man, dah ku tak layan, dah ku avoid cam nak mampus...and to the extent, dah ku sindir/kutuk/humiliate kebangangan nya yang mutlak tu depan-depan muka dia, masih lagi tak paham. I think that it is so true with men, with their selective learning difficulties. They will pick and choose apa dia nak paham and tak nak paham.

Why I still melayan?

a) Pasal nak update about him in my blog? Hish...sebelum dia or without him pun, I can still write.
b) Pasal diri sendiri gatal ke? Cesss...tolonglah, Anuar Zain ke kacau, takpelah jugak.
c) Desperate sangat ke? Me or him?

Kesimpulannya, when look back to why ex wives yang dah kena seksa/pelangkung/tipu dek laki semasing and balik semula ke pangkuan beruang tu, ever wonder why they did?

Tak layan, di kacau. Men says women are too noisy...as in cakap banyak..pok pek pok pek. Maybe true. Pok pek pok pek ni adalah antara activity yang therapeutic yang menghilangkan stress yang mainly datang dari jejantan ni.

Honestly, we women want a quiet life. And life is so quiet without a man.And a quiet life can also be achieved by giving them men, what they want. Dia nak jumpa and ajak minum kopi, dah la tu, cakap sekali aje tak cukup, cakap dalam phone, text message....hah kau!!! Harus tak kau jawab..ok la..ok la ?

Motif tetiba lak ada unsur-unsur women's lib ni?

To Guile & Hjh Leemah, akan ku usahakan tag mu. Tapi Hjh Leemah, tag mung tu macam payoh la...dah le kawe ni bukan computer savvy.....